Is it even worth trying to lost weight?

[toolatetoloseweight]

I am currently in the obese range and about 4 stone over my healthy weight. I basically put on loads of weight in my first pregnancy (6 years ago) and I've never managed to shift it.
I was previously a healthy weight but was a fat child and have always struggled a bit with putting on weight very easily.

I keep reading stats saying how unlikely it is for an obese woman to ever lose the weight and keep it off without bariatric surgery - and it is making me wonder if it is even worth trying at this stage...

For context, I am relatively active - walk the dog twice a day, swim twice a week, run around after kids, occasionally go for a run (3-5km so not massive distances but just to put in context that I'm not so big as to be struggling to get around). I dont have a terrible diet (though obviously could be better!). i know from experience that small changes don't make a difference to me- I need to eat under 1200 calories to lose. I am terribly unhappy with the way I look and dread going out and being see by people. However not sure if it is all just a losing battle at this stage...

I'm just aiming for health really. 5ft 10 and size 16-18 and about 18 stone
I do spin classes 4-6 days a week from 30-60 mins and am building up to 90 min ones. Trying to eat more veg, and more protein

There is thread after thread on here from people who did very low cal diets or cut out carbs and put all the weight back on. Like endless. Also lot of people I have seen who have had gastric surgery have a lot of problems with their teeth health and loose skin due to dramatic fast weight loss

you need to repair your relationship with food, not find a way to make it even worse

eating no carbs is by far the worst idea for someone who already struggles to stick to a healthy eating plan and just makes sticking to it near impossible. Eating no carbs is fine if someone wants to eat virtually no fruit or veg or most of their energy sources and spend all their money on meat and eating eggs and being constipated to lose 10lbs

losing weight, really losing it and repairing your relationship with food and your body is really hard work. But it’s not impossible. It really can be done you just have to stop looking for quick answers. It’s like starting a new job for life. You will make some sacrifices (eating less of the foods you rely on for comfort or undoing bad habits), learning new skills like cooking and reading labels. You will have to sometimes make hard decisions to eat less of or avoid something you really love. But you do not have to give up food groups or eat dust all day long. Those are extreme. There is middle ground. You just have to believe you can get to where you want to be and start every day as a new one. Weight loss takes months, but it’s worth it because you do feel so good, you have more energy, you feel brighter, you want to move more, you feel proud of yourself and healthier. If you want to do it, you can do it.

The NHS weight loss apps are free and easy to use, I would download those to start

also in all honesty, I’m on a weight loss journey and the first thing I had to admit to myself was that I wasn’t honestly tracking correctly to begin. I was over estimating food and forgetting to add things. 100g of pasta is way smaller than you think it is, so people end up eating 200g accidentally and not logging it. I don’t love logging calories but I think it’s a useful tool to open your mind to what you are actually eating

and resetting your metabolism has been proven to not be a thing
fasting is an awful idea for someone who struggles to diet. It is setting yourself up to fail within about 2 weeks. I wish people would stop giving such awful advice. Like drinking water with lemon in it helps you lose weight (it doesn’t)

My understanding is the diets only work while you are on them, and the minute you come off them, the weight comes back on.

The same is true for bariatric surgery, which requires a strict diet.
Figure out how to get around the restrictions, and your weight comes straight back. The stomach is a fairly elastic organ & if you overeat it will still stretch, even after surgery.

Long-term follow up studies show this usually happens within two years of the surgery; after surgery, it takes very little to overeat.

The weight will come off if you find a sustainable way to consume fewer calories than you expend.

I've been 4 stone heavier than I am. Don't diet. Change how you eat.

I needed to see this comment today. I'm going to take your advice and work on my relationship with my body and food instead of punishing myself.

Hi op. I really empathise, I've been you and felt the same but much much heavier. I did eventually have surgery.

Also on calories, I've eaten 1283 calories today and walked the dog, did work, did chores and 45 mins of cardio and haven't passed out.

Read Why We Eat Too Much by Andrew Jenkinson. He basically says processed food is the problem. He says if you do what he suggests in the book you will lose weight and it will last forever but it will be slow - but worth it.

@misskatamari i second rebelfit, just the Facebook posts alone have transformed the way I think. I’m focussing on lowering my set point now, not my weight.

I am about 3 stone overweight and have been for a few years. I am also post menopausal. I have been a vegetarian for most of my life and had a carb heavy diet. Since having kids (not vegetarian) I have made sure I am cooking them a healthy meal and then have been existing and am totally addicted to carbs.
I am pre diabetic and never seem satisfied with what I eat and am hungry soon after.

So, I have recently done lots of research and have started a keto diet. So far my hunger is so much less, I have lost a couple of kg and actually feel better in myself. I am enjoying the food, feel like this is sustainable in the long run and realise that it is a change for life and not a diet. I am doing lazy keto eating low carb substitute foods but plan to eat cleaner as I become fat adapted.

Another who would recommend low carb. It sounds impossible at the start but it soon just becomes normal. I usually skip breakfast then have salad for lunch which will be lots of leaves with chicken or cheese and usually coleslaw. Dinner is meat or cheese with veg or salad. So halloumi with roast veg for example. Carbs still comes out at less than 50g.

I know it gets a lot of hate because you are excluding a food group but we didn't evolve to eat carbs like we do. Carbs trigger insulin and if you are secreting insulin you are storing fat. Get blood sugar low enough for long enough and you switch to burning fat. But it is forever in so far as if I stop and start eating pasta, rice, bread etc all the time the weight will go back on. I feel better on the diet as I don't suffer cravings like I usually do. I actually eat more varieties of veg and greater quantity on this diet than I ever would on my usual carb heavy diet.

@ObjectionHearsay is speaking a lot of sense!

I also read an article on bariatric surgery recently OP. And I was really surprised by the percentage of people who gradually increase their food intake till the surgery fails and they're piling on weight. I thought it was a bullet proof procedure. Very eye opening.
So maybe cut that possibility right out of the equation. It could free your mind up to consider all the approaches PP describe above.
I don't believe any of them are correct that their way is 100% the best.
But there are a heap of ideas on this thread now.
Maybe there's one that strikes a chord. In which case do that!

If you don't want to lose weight, that's fine of course.

If you do though, don't let perfect be the enemy of good. You don't have to become a size 8 and Olympic athlete and maintain that forever, or it's all pointless. What's wrong with losing a bit, maybe you are still overweight but not obese. And so what if you put some back on in a few years? Better than not losing weight now, and still putting on more in a few years.

I am sorry but this is rubbish. Humans invented bread 10,000 or more years ago. Fruit and veg are carbs. We didn’t evolve to eat meat and cheese.
if you want to do a low carb diet as you like it then that’s fine but this is not even true. It’s not just avoiding the pasta and bread that is making you lose weight it is that you are eating less than 1000 calories a day and it’s the low calories that are making you lose weight. I take it you are not diabetic so why are you monitoring your insulin. Insulin sends glucose to your muscles, fat and liver, what makes fat on your body is consuming more calories than you burn. not eating carbs. Look up the law of thermodynamics.

I did do low carb once it was brutal and I injured myself working out. I have lost more weight eating a balanced diet with whole grains carbs than I ever did on the low carb diet, which I couldn’t stick to and was stupidly restrictive

This is what 100 calories looks like. Look how small the cheese is. Meat is the same it’s dense. It’s so calorie dense it doesn’t have any volume and people will be hungry all the time this is why it’s hard to stick to.

https://www.bhf.org.uk/informationsupport/heart-matters-magazine/nutrition/weight/what-does-100-calories-look-like

Reading this thread, I know WW and SW are both criticised for the number of people who yoyo diet on them. But are they maybe the best way to go?

I lost about a stone following SW years ago, but weight has slowly crept back on. I found the classes very patronising hence followed the diet without classes.

I'm currently about 3st too heavy.

I should add I struggle with low carbing and fasting.

It’s not realistic to cut out carbs etc. Only do that if you’re prepared to never eat them again. Otherwise you’ll just gain the weight when you go back to them. I cut out fizzy drinks and I won’t go back to them as it’s been over a decade.
It doesn’t need to be complicated. From living in countries with high obesity to low I think the main difference is portion size. You can still enjoy food. Best of luck.

@SausagePourHomme
It is true. It's not sustainable and quite frankly, not a nice way to live. 1200 is extremely restrictive.

I seen that comment and I’m also dieting I have lost 3 stone so far but still more to go but that comment really knocked me as well.

Thank you, I fear I'll get drowned out by people promoting skipping meals, cutting carbs and listening to a hypnotic pod cast. When really it's simple.

All you need is a calorie deficit to loose weight, and if you manage the calorie deficit slowly and gradually giving yourself time to adjust and learn it will work and it will last.

But everyone always wants to loose 14stone in a day, rather than the realisation that you didn't get overweight in 12 weeks, so why do you expect to loose it all in 12 weeks.

Weight loss should be gradually done, and over a long period of time. Your body needs time and your mind to adjust to a calorie deficit. Stop pressuring your body to loose 2lb a week and aim for maybe 3- 4lb a month.

Relax it will happen.

I would have a week where you record and measure everything you’re eating. It’s really easy for portion sizes to inflate over time. It absolutely is worth addressing your weight. There are so many risks to being obese.

Hallelujah!

They really promote bad thinking about food groups. The word syns is the clue. They are not good food psychology

I’ve been overweight all my adult life and am classed as obese, even though I don’t think I look it! (In denial, clearly!) I’ve tried weight watchers, fasting, Atkins, Dukan and general calorie restriction. But the only thing that has made any lasting difference for me was making permanent, sustainable changes. I stopped introducing or restricting anything I couldn’t stick to. Over the course of 2021 I managed to lose 20 pounds. It was slow (painfully slow at times), but steady, and by the end of it I realised I felt better than a year ago and could happily continue long term.
However, then I fell pregnant at Christmas! So I’m now gaining weight again. But I know afterwards I will continue with my ‘lifelong’ plan - tweaking and refining it along the way.
Some of the changes I made were: running 30 mins twice a week (sadly I’ve had to stop that in pregnancy due to a bleeding scare), walking a fair amount (though I would like to increase that once the baby is here), eating a small fruit plate every afternoon, eating two vegan/veggie evening meals a week, an oily fish dish once a week (was all meat before), having two veggie-heavy stir fries with just a little meat and brown noodles or rice, only eating my own homemade sourdough bread, cutting down to just one sweet treat per day (arguably that could be reduced still!), switching to mostly whole grains. We made Friday treat tea night, when we have something like fish and chips, pizza or pie, so always look forward to that.
There is still more I could do to refine and improve my diet and lifestyle, but taking it slowly and making changes gradually has been the only lasting success I’ve ever achieved. If I hadn’t fallen pregnant, I would likely be another 7-8 pounds lighter by now too. But I’m relaxed about that!
Eating 1200 calories a day doesn’t sound very much if you’re active. I wonder if you’re not eating enough good food and slowing your metabolism by being too restrictive. Or going through that old cycle of working at it really hard for a while, then ultimately failing to stick to it and overeating again. All I know is that dieting rarely works as you can’t keep it up.
Yes, it’s slow and boring and won’t get you quick results, but making sustainable diet and lifestyle changes will work in the long run.