To not understand “engagement shoots”

[SaltandPepper22]

Seems to be a Thing now that when you book your wedding photographer you also get an engagement shoot.

My instagram feed is full of them at the moment. Couples walking through woods/meadows/forests looking into each other’s eyes, pretending to laugh and nonchalantly hanging out of trees. Most wedding photographers seem to include them as part of the package so I’m not sure how you get out of having to have one.

AIBU to find them totally cringe?

See also: pregnancy shoots

That cat is rolling its eyes for a reason 🙄

When we booked ours (2014) we got one with the booking but that was because we were awkward as hell and it helped us relax a bit. The photos will never see the light of day because I really was awkward! The wedding photos are lovely because we were having a great time and they're my favourite photos but I think the engagement photos are awful because neither of us like having our photos taken!

We got ours free. It was to get us comfortable with our photographer. We had a great time and it meant that at the wedding we were both relaxed and able to take shots without being nervous.

I didn’t have them. But I don’t understand what you don’t understand about them. HTH

What's there to understand. We did one, our wedding photographer included an engagement shoot as a way to get to know each other, know his style, know our style and to make sure that we would be comfortable in front of the camera. It was a great experience, we got some great photos plus I know exactly what poses/positions suit us.

We got engaged over 20 years ago, and my PiL were SO keen for us to have an engagement portrait, they even wanted to pay for it. We didn't do it in the end - neither of us are particularly fussed, but now, I'm not sure. Maybe it would be nice to have that, but it's really not my thing, nor DH.

An engagement shoot is when a couple get engaged then they pay someone to ‘shoot’ photos of them. Bit like any other photo opportunity really. If you understand holiday photos, baby photos, family photos, then you can apply that same concept (people like having photos of special moments) to help you comprehend the concept of engagement photos.

I didn't get one, but why others do is pretty easy to understand. People like having photos taken and like to commerate special/happy events. Doesn't seem like something to worry about, paying someone to take your photo isn't harming anyone else is it?

🤣🤣🤣 And a variation of nonchalantly hanging out of trees 🌲

Each to their own.

But 'Get out of having to have one'?

Obviously, you just tell your photographer you don't want one.

If they only offer packages with an engagement shoot, you tell them you don't want it and ask for a reduced quote without the engagement shoot.

Isn't this common sense?

We didn't find this to be a problem when we got married this year and were looking for photographers. It was something that a lot offered (presumably because a lot of people want it), but you could easily just not have it.

This!

This!

So don’t do it? Why be judgmental of how other people want to celebrate something that means a lot to them?

Ah, MN at its best, competitive “I don’t give a shit about anything”