Soo to be husband using my previous depression against me for custody

[AdifferentGoat]

I'm curious to know if anyone else has faced this. I have filed for divorce but my husband is trying to gain full custody re my toddler daughter by stating I'm mentally unwell. Yes, I suffered from depression/PND but since then, I have attended therapy every week and also I have a good job and have been promoted. I'm just wondering whether anyone else has faced. My lawyer tells me to not worry but I can't help but worry. I suppose looking for reassurance 😕

@AdifferentGoat

I get the not wanting to air one's dirty laundry, but remember that that is very different from defending yourself from his slurs. Not that you need to call everyone and say "Now hear MY side....', but you certainly needn't remain silent if 'gossip' reaches your ears about lies he's been spreading. You have every right to set the record straight. But another thing to remember is that he is going to work very hard to get all mutual friends 'on his side'. And he will try to use them to 'spy' (for lack of a better word) on you. So remember to consider carefully what you say and who you say it to. Not as far as defending yourself, but careful about telling others what your lawyer has said, what steps you are taking, your day to day doings.

It sounds as if you're still in the same house? If so, be sure you have all communications/online stuff locked down and locked away. He will be poking and prying, mark my words.

Hey OP, I remember you from your post in February and was rooting for you then!
This situation has escalated pretty quickly because your DH is a narcissistic delusional control freak and you are no longer dancing to his tune.
Don’t panic. Him going for full custody is out of bitterness and spite to ensure he inflicts the most emotional damage and hurt and make you doubt your decision. Don’t for one moment doubt your decision, he won’t succeed with his threats. Read all the lovely and amazing responses you’ve had, everyone is rooting for you, stay strong.
Also, you should take what you are entitled to, 50%. Do it for your daughter.

You come across as a wonderful, caring, loving mother with a huge heart and a lot of good humour (based on your previous insta post). I’m still rooting for you, good luck ❤️

I had PND. When I was married, my ex threatened he would use my mental illness to have the children taken away from me as I wasn't mentally fit to look after them.

We split up to domestic violence and social services were involved. He brought up my past mental illness so it had to be investigated. I was terrified!

The GP report came back and all it said was something like "..... suffered PND but was able to recognise the signs and asked for help. I'm confident if anything happened again, she would seek help at an early stage." The female social worker just shrugged and said "oh PND, that gets a lot of us doesn't it?!" She checked I was well now and then dismissed it. It was never mentioned again by them and it wasn't used against me.

I've had this from my abusive ex and yes you do need to take it seriously I'm afraid. I didn't have PND and was never diagnosed with any mental health issue (I struggled because he refused to help me and left me completely alone with a colicky, fretful baby), but it has never stopped my ex from trying to use this against me in court. In Autumn 2021, the last time he dragged me to court, 7 years after we split, he trotted out the 'mental health issues' line again and the court ordered my medical records since our split be obtained from my GP and used as a court document for all to see. There was nothing in there that would count against me but the massive invasion of privacy was so traumatising.

The best you can do is keep your nose clean and have very good legal representation.

To Greyskies and YorkshirePuddings

Using MH issues against the other parent is not allowed in the US because of the privacy issues and also because of a public interest in destigmatising MH problems.