Artificial garden lawns - what a weird world

[Figmentofmyimagination]

Another installed on our street. I just don’t understand it. Why would anyone do this?

There is a petition to ban their sale for installation in residential dwellings if you want to sign it:

It’s only got 5,900 signatures so far, which seems a pretty low number, given how much of a no brainer this is, imo. Maybe that’s just me.

petition deleted by MNHQ as we don't allow them, we're afraid.

@DdraigGoch so we can look at our garden but not use it...

Is it the worst thing? No.

Is it still a pretty fucking shitty thing to do? Yes.

Why destroy nature and the thousands of tiny ecosystems which inhabit a normal lawn, and create more plastic waste, just so you don't have to wipe your feet when you go inside.

Imagine if someone ripped up our fields and replaced them with plastic wheat - because that's what you're doing to the bees and butterflies and moths and all the other insects, invertebrates etc that rely on natural gardens, and the birds and mammals that live on those in turn. You know, animals, those inconvenient things we have to share the planet with and which feature in the stories we tell to our children.

We've become so divorced from the natural world that some people can't even bear to have it anywhere near our homes.

Plastic lawns are a depressing indictment of some people's mindsets.

I agree it looks rubbish but we are considering it as we don’t know what else to do as our entire “garden” is tarmac (it’s a bit of a former school playground). We’ve had quotes to break it up and dispose of the tarmac but the quotes are over 50k! We thought about raised grass beds but have been told it’ll likely just die due to the lack of drainage and we’d have to make the soil pretty deep for the grass to be in anyway sturdy enough for our small children. Any suggestions welcome!

On a previous thread I learned about moss lawns and clover lawns so it seems like there are other options if your garden isn't ideal for traditional grass. I don't know much about it myself but maybe worth looking into!

The number of insects has reduced drastically.

And farmland is being covered by solar panels.

It’s a small thing you can do to help.

@DdraigGoch we have many refill shops near us and I went into them when they opened.

First I could only do a fraction of my weekly shop there

Second everything was at least twice if not 3 times the price. To fill up my £1 bottle of shower gel would cost me £4.... that's not doable in a family budget. They are very much DINK shops round here.

😭

To people saying it’s an alternative to ‘mud’

1. unless it’s boggy, why is mud such a problem - unless you aspire to a completely sterile life, doesn’t do anyone/children any harm
2. get some grassmats which reduce mud to a minimum but allow the grass to grown through or….
3. go for some chavvy artificial grass!

Bar soap is cheaper and comes in paper. Ditch the shower gel.

The man over the road hoovers his every so often, which does amuse me

I had an little area on a slope where grass just wouldn’t grow well (rubble underneath) so considered it. Also it was a strange long thin shape and difficult to mow. I didn’t go for it in the end. But more education is needed.

Plenty of it to be found in Mumsnet - especially on the subject of "sex ponds"

Why destroy nature and the thousands of tiny ecosystems which inhabit a normal lawn

You're assuming people have 'normal lawns' but that's not going to be the case for most. They may have paving, gravel, messy patches of mud that haven't sustained grass and can't be used. Is it so extraordinary that people want to use their own gardens? Lovely lush lawns aren't options for everyone.

Is it still a pretty fucking shitty thing to do?

There are probably hundreds of worse things.

Also it can look very real. There are loads of different products.

Plenty of it to be found in Mumsnet - especially on the subject of "sex ponds"

Sex ponds evoke similar ire to fake grass. It's not the naice middle class way.

Why/in what way is it smelly?

Artificial lawns and 😝in our street nearly every front garden paved over. 😔.

This 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

What a bunch of snobs.

I have real grass. But if it was more practical, or the lawn didn't grow well I'd 100% get artificial.

So your plan is to put plastic grass down and then let the dog piss all over it on a regular basis?! That's incredibly disgusting.

Of course there are worse things. That doesn't make plastic lawns any less shitty.

And you'd be surprised at what can live in patchy grass, mud, and gravel. Much more than can live in plastic, for a start.

I might get some to put on the rest of my patio as it’s old and ugly and needs replacing but I can’t afford it so will just order some and lay it on top (seen people doing this) and way cheaper than paying someone to lay a new patio.

What's wrong with your cats crapping in your garden?

Unfortunately we have a very large tree in our garden with a preservation order on it. All of our grass is dead as a result. What would you suggest we do if artificial grass is banned?

But what if you’ve you’ve inherited a paved garden and want a bit of soft ‘grass’ underfoot? Surely you can’t be expected to jack out all the concrete base underneath? It costs a fortune! And then all the concrete and paving to the dump. Surely there’s a place for everything? I don’t like it, but with small London gardens that have been paved over it’s a happy medium?

Because I would rather them use the litter tray than the garden?! 🙄