To ask about more odd family beliefs??

[Latenightthoughts111]

Hi again!

following on from my coke can/eating in the street/prostitution thread it got me thinking a LOT about my childhood and I’ve thought of some other odd things I’d like to see if we have in common or not

prefacing this with I am late 80s born to a late 40s DM

main one is only doing one thing per day. DM literally can only do one “thing” a day. Go to Asda? That’s it. Meal out? Yes that’s it then nothing else. Market day in the morning? Sure but that’s it not opening the door to do anything else today thank u!

this was all through my childhood and still now. I honestly was baffled when I heard of people popping to the shops when they’ve already been out that day!!!

another one similar is going out after dark. To be going out after sundown is soooo awesome I love it. It feels taboo to go to Aldi when it’s dark outside and all the buses are lit up. It’s magical! I wish I was joking 😂it was completely forbidden, or to be honest not even discussed, to go out for dinner or anything after school as it was too dark. We never ever went out on a Sunday either. Not massively religious but Sunday was a proper “get ready for school” day with my one bath a week!

any others out there who still feel the joy of the forbidden 6pm journey out into the great beyond???

@PakkaMakka so I'm completely the opposite now. I fix things before they brake. Everything has to be new. I spend far more than I need to keeping things nice and I'm a total clean freak. I'm damaged.

We had a bin in the lounge that was purely ornamental! You go to put a chocolate wrapper in? 'Take it to the kitchen bin!' I still take the piss out of my mum over this 30 years later. And she still has a bin in her lounge that she never uses!

She also had a thing about Doc Marten boots. Absolutely not, no way, no how! Wasn't the cost, she just hated them! Eventually I saved up my birthday/Christmas/pocket money and bought my own and she decided they weren't so bad actually. Two years I'd been asking for some and hearing about how ugly they were! 🙄

@MardyOldGoth I wasn't allowed those either. My mum called them bovver boots.

It was news to me that you could buy new furniture. Even now when I pick something I feel like I'll probably own it the rest of my life. We had rooms with no furniture and we never bothered to buy any for some reason. We moved houses with what we had and if the new house had an extra lounge room etc well it just stayed empty.

And my mum never wanted to drive anywhere more than once either. If you asked her to drop you at a friends or shops etc and she'd already been somewhere she would protest as she'd already had the car out. She made it sound like putting it on the drive and reversing it out were really strenuous tasks.

I was only permitted to drink with meals, and I could have squash. If I wanted a drink outside mealtimes "there's water in the tap".

My dad declaring that to beat the traffic, we'd have to leave for a day out/holiday at 8am sharp. We never managed it.

My mum insisting that no room can be painted blue because it's a "cold colour". My hallway is painted light blue.

Also my mum insisted I have a fringe as a younger child or my hair will get in my eyes. She had never heard of hair clips, evidently. I don't have a fringe now, but am considering it to hide my wrinkles.

Ooh! And we only got milk from the milkman three times a week, one pint, and my parents got annoyed if we drank too much and ran out. It wasn't until I began living with my now DH that no-one else does this and if you want more milk just go to the bloody shop and buy some.

You have to go to the supermarket on a Saturday.

Now when my dad was working and took the car to work and my mum didn't drive it made sense, but long after my mum had learned to drive, no kids home they still did Saturday shopping.

When they retired they still did it.

It's only after my mum died that my dad now shops when he wants to.

@Latenightthoughts111 OP I didn’t know anyone else had the one thing per day situation going on!! Our DMs must be very similar ages and perhaps that’s what it is - and perhaps growing up, one thing actually did take the whole day with transport etc etc but it drives me NUTS that this is still the approach for her now….if the boiler man is coming at an agreed time in the afternoon to service the boiler, she couldn’t POSSIBLY go out in the morning….
Dentist appointment? That day’s a write off
And always having to be eons early for everything!!! Makes me wonder how they’d cope with my work diary with everything back to back and only joining a meeting the very minute it’s due to start!!

Yogurt. It was the 70s. My mother insisted I eat yogurt every day.

Nothing happened during Wimbledon, absolutely nothing.

You must always blow your nose before you leave the house, and if you're are delayed leaving, go and blow it again.

We were often delayed leaving, we were out by the door when my mother would have to check all the cushions were plumped up on the sofas. Always.

Meals ran on for hours. As a child this was boring.

Even I was expected to watch the news and read a paper, at age 3 my lunch was combined with watching the news.

After school I was allowed one cup of tea and exactly three biscuits, and limited to one childrens programme.

The self-denial thing. To this day I feel guilty about spending money on myself. Buying for other people? Go for it.

Everything I had as a child, I was expected to share with my spoiled younger brother. I refused once and my mother stuck her face in mine and said ’You NASTY little girl!’ I was about ten and I remember thinking ‘She’s weird.’

If you didn’t see my original thread please have a look as it’s all about not drinking from cans!!

Drinking from a can!

We are clearly long lost twins!!! Yes I’ve never thought about the public transport thing, she’s never drove so maybe that has something to do with it! I asked what she was doing today and she said she has a gp appointment at ten. So that’s that for the day then I thought haha!!! I don’t know how she ever worked either! Or had fun! Seems like it all started after I came along I guess. We lived with her parents after I was born (no DF in picture for a while) so I guess their generation(1920s born) and habits rubbed off on her? Do you feel odd doing two things in one day? Or dare I ask…three things??? Surely you don’t go to the gp, eat lunch out then maybe, god forbid, go to the supermarket????

I've never really thought about the one thing a day rule, but maybe that's why my mum thinks my life is so hectic?
An ordinary day when the kids were younger , drop them to school , go to work , supermarket etc feed them and then go to gym during their swimming lesson. ' hectic' ' you must be exhausted '

I wonder what DC would say about our silly rules that feel sensible at the moment.

Yanbu op. Except 4 o clock feels late to.me! I don't let my kids know. But when there's an activity/club to go to I feel like it's the end kf the day even though bed time is hours away.

When I first started seeing dh properly and we went out in the evening I felt so naughty! I am 30.now woth 4 kids and same dh and still feel funny going out after 3 pm! I had to be home from school by 4 pm as secondary was 2 towns away. And if I want home bu 4 I would.get lots of phone calls asking howls long I will be!

Also had to be in bed by 6p. Until my step dad left my mum. Then she wouldn't let me go to bed! Ended up keeping me up until 2 am watching horror films. Then made me sleep in her bed because she didn't want to be alone. Then after 3 years ish she met her new dh and I was banished back to 6pm bed times ay 13 years old!

Bath and hair wash on a Sunday. Choc biscuits and cocoa only on Sundays. Tomato cup a soups, one box bought once a week on a saturday- once they were gone, no more could possibly be bought until the following saturday. Can relate to not going out after dark. No playing outside on a Sunday morning.

@Latenightthoughts111 I'm kind of a bit like your mum. I don't like going out more than once. I tend to like to do all my jobs (so ASDA, post office, school run for example) then come back and relax, bra off and not go back out again.

That said I love the dark streets at night too so maybe not so much.

My MIL used to do the one thing per day thing but I just presumed that as she was older and didn't work she didnt have to rush. But she did take ages to do anything. Going for a quick wash or shower- she'd be gone for at least an hour. Making a sandwich? That's another hour.
She was quite amazed when SIL invited people to dinner and went to the gym/sports club on the same day

@ObjectionHearsay omg my grandma used to do that - she told me her mum has told her it was so the lightening wouldn’t be attracted to the mirrors and strike the house 😂 she also used to open all the doors and windows so the lightening could get out if it did strike the house 😂😂 I miss her ❤️

Can’t have the telly on either with lightning or thunder, was that the same for you too?

As it’s raining today I just thought, mum is pretty much terrified of the rain. Is this a thing too? Really really really does not like going out in it. Messages me to tell me it’s raining asks if it’s raining where I am and if I’m going out. Can’t understand going out in the rain and is so anxious if I have to drive in it!

Not being allowed to play out until after 9.30.am because 'the streets have to "air" '
You must eat meat because you need "fibres"
Sunday Best Clothes are for Sunday only.
Sunday Lunch is served at 1.00.pm SHARP
Only tarts use tampons
Mini-skirts are "slutty"
Washing your hair more than once a week makes it greasy.
If you are ill you are fed Lucozade, arrowroot biscuits and steamed fish.
You must wear clean knickers every day, in case you get run down by a bus and have to go to hospital.
Always remove your glasses before having a 'photo taken.
Sunday night is 'bath night'.

And - if it thunders put all the kitchen knives in the draws....

Couldn't start anything new / go out / have people over after 2pm as it was then "getting a bit late". I still get a bit antsy if a friend wants to meet at 3pm for a coffee, shopping or something.

My mother couldn’t compute that, if you’d had a big meal at lunchtime, you still might want a light tea later. I used to love a Sunday lunch, but my enjoyment was always tarnished by the fact that when she asked if we wanted any tea, any response other than ‘No thank you’ was met with ‘What? After that huuuuuge meal?! You want MORE food?!’ or similar.

I remember once asking for ‘Just a toasted sandwich’, as I thought that was pretty safe and not an example of unacceptable gluttony. I got ‘Oh, just a toasted sandwich. That’s all you want, is it? Just a sandwich’. I always wondered why the bloody hell she even asked if we wanted anything!

P.S. I did eventually ask that question as an adult and was told ‘Well, I thought I should ask, but I never thought anyone would actually want anything’ 😏 The last time we had Sunday lunch at lunchtime was a few years back because we could only get into the restaurant really early. Sure enough, over six hours later she asked if anyone wanted tea and, when we said yes, the whole ‘After that huuuuuuge meal?!’ routine came out of mothballs. Thankfully, as an adult, I felt comfortable enough to respond ‘Well why the bloody hell did you ASK?’ 😁

This was my Nan. She’d phone up on the day we were due to visit and say ‘Don’t come out in this’, as if a downpour was the Great Flood 😁