To be unreasonably scared of weight training

[blinder]

So, I keep hearing that the way to fitness is lifting and weight training. Also, the women who do it seem to genuinely love it.

I recently joined a gym and so I now could start a weight regime, but I’m scared to start. My fears -
Looking like an old and flabby harridan amongst all the strong and fit people.
Getting injured (what if I ruin my knees or put out my back?)
Boredom. Oh I pick something up and put it down again? Twenty times? Then another thing? For an hour?
Being so weak that I can’t make any progress.

Please, weight trainers, give me tips to get past these fears and get into lifting. I know it’s good for me. I’m just intimidated by it.

I felt like this to begin with a short course with a PT is necessary when you being weight lifting. You need to know the correct form so you don’t end up with an injury. It’s not like just hopping on a cardio machine. Also they will increase your confidence and once you have the knowledge you can then stop paying out for a PT.

Proper lifters will come in and say how useless it is because it focuses in high repetitions so it's more about general fitness and toning rather than building any muscle. However it's a good introduction to techniques and getting used to actually lifting weights.

”Proper lifter” reporting for duty here

my problem with Bodypump classes is that I see so much bad form. Particularly in people squatting.

Body pump is much more of an aerobic work out than weight lifting. The only bit of it that challenges me weights wise are the weighted bicep exercises because I’m not a Bro lifter who skips leg days. Every day is leg day for me!

As PP have said @blinder if you want to get into lifting heavy, book in for regular PT sessions. Most gyms offer packages of5 or10 at a discounted rate.

Ive always done physical stuff (mostly dance then aerobics Jane Fonda style) but I’ve never really been athletic. Working with a PT and learning to lift heavy has been a revelation and I’m fitter now at 62 than I’ve ever been.

And much fitter than most 20 year olds. I certainly get a LOT of support at my gym. No “middle-agedharridan” judgement. I’ve had other gym members cheering me on when I’ve done really heavy sled pushes, for example.

PS if you want to build all-over body strength, the sled is brilliant and needs very little technique.

Following, I'm not a member of a gym and csnt afford a pt

My local council run gyms have Lift It classes. Good and cost effective way to learn to lift properly.

Btw, I see my PT at home. I have my own weights now but she used to bring them with her. A PT is never a cheap option but you don't necessarily have to do it at a gym. And I do the rest of my lifting at home with YouTube, but PP are right that you need to get technique cracked first to prevent injury. Once you have that, building up muscle mass is actually significant protection against e.g. injuring your back in everyday life.

Really?

that does not happen! It’s actually quite hard for women to get that bulky muscle mass. I find that I am leaner. I have rock hard quads. You can see the definition of my hamstrings and abs and my arms are really well shaped - great for summer short sleeves.

I have recently started a body pump class,. Was really impressed with how much I enjoy it. Weights and repetition and low impact so easy on my old body

@NightmareSlashDelightful
If you do downward-facing dog in yoga, it won't be too much adjusting to do a push-up. (Probably.)

I wish this were true. I’ve been doing sun salutations for years and still always collapse on the push up. My form is probably abysmal. I also have very weak arms.

I’ve found my people here!

My PT always combined strength and metcon (metabolic conditioning) in each session. So the first 30 minutes will be strength work: usually heavy compound lifts (deadlifts, squats) or sled pushes and pulls. If I’m really lifting heavy - deadlift sets between 90 and 100 kilos or squats at 50-60 kilos, then there are no supersets - but lots of rest between sets of 3 to 5 reps.

And seriously, lifting heavy is easier than the metcon stuff which is usually HIIT based, with NO rest gaps. So the other day I was lifting (or rather, failing) at 100kilos deadlifts for the first half hour.

Then I was on the stationary bike, doing rounds of 2000 metres, keeping my RPM at 100 and at the end of each cycle, on the floor for 10 burpees - just to catch my breath!

That was much harder than getting 100kilos off the ground!

re Push ups - start with eccentric push ups! You don't hold at the bottom, you lie on the ground and then shove yourself back up (flat back, obv). It starts training the muscles you need without needing the level of strength required for a standard push up! I can still only do like, 5 standard, but it's more than I could do when I started!

okay thank you @shrodingersvaccine! I’ll try that.

also noting the sled from previous poster.

also relieved that this might only take 20 mins!!

I've never seen anyone leave in the middle. If you feel it's too much, you can take the weights off and just use the bar or just one tiny weight by itself. Or you sit out a few sets and start when you're refreshed. And frankly, everyone's concentrating on their own work so not really noticing what you're up to. I've found people really welcoming. I now do BP at home but do miss the companionship in the gym classes.

Yup. Or do negatives. Do the downward bit as slowly as possible. Put off the moment of face plant! Then push up any old how.

My trainer always asks for hand-release press ups. These mean you get your whole body on the floor, then have to summon up abs strength to get back up. It’s as much in the core as the arms. Think of pulling your chest towards your pelvis.

or practice hollow holds. Killer for abs.

I have a mate who has had brilliant results from weightlifting. You need to incorporate diet changes and general activity needs to increase to lose weight. She was big before and looks totally different now. Very inspirational.

I started doing weights a couple of times a week at the gym last August and running once or twice a week. My gym is full of young people who just need to lift a 3kg dumbbell to lose weight, so I know how you feel. I haven't had many results weight wise, gained a couple of pounds if anything, but my diet could improve and I'm probably not doing enough. Everytime I increase weight a problem in my back comes back, which is frustrating. My mind is willing, but my schedule and body isn't! I do feel much, much better for doing it though. I feel stronger and a bit more toned, but I am sad I'm not losing weight, because under the flab is a toned body! I need to stop BFing as I think this is keeping the weight on and this is the issue.

I do get bored of the gym sometimes, but I WFH, so for me it's an excuse for change of scenery and time to unwind mentally. I'm probably hitting perimenopause soon, so I think it is important to have a healthy lifestyle while going through that nightmare. I'm glad I'm getting in the swing of it before it happens.

Glad to hear you’re going to give it a go OP!

Just to add to everyone else’s comments re no one looking at you. I once smashed my nose on the bar and there was quite a lot of blood, not a single person around me noticed. Which was a shame as I was hoping for some sympathy!

I also tried body pump and was shocked at how bad everyone’s form was. I also found the combination of weights and an aerobic workout wasn’t for me at all, I prefer the focus working with weights gives. Lifting (heavy) weights also raises the heart weight, keeps it raised which in turns burns fat. It’s a myth that one needs to do cardio to burn fat.

When lifting weights, it’s about form and also tempo. A trainer will explain the importance of tempo to you. I think there’s so much misunderstanding around weight training and what it does to the female body. Unless you are taking huge amounts of steroids, you won’t get a thick neck or huge arms. Weight training burns body fat while building muscle. Muscle takes up less space than fat, and so while you might not necessarily lose weight, you will drop clothing sizes. For women in middle-age, weight training is more effective than cardio as it raises the heart rate in the same way but puts less stress on the body. However, weight training will only do so much, you need to eat well/up your protein intake.

Unless you’re aiming to do so and prepared to put in an enormous amount of work, you will not get a thick neck or waist. If anything, mine are far more slender than they ever were because I’ve reduced body fat but avoided looking skinny.

Weight training is so much fun and very, very productive in terms of effort in compared to results out. I’d drop any other diet or exercise method before I stopped weight training.

I’ve become hooked on Caroline Girvan’s Iron workout and my new dumbbells have just arrived. Wouldn’t have done it without pump first.

I'm post menopausal. Do about 3 hours of weight machines and dumbbells a week plus an extra bit of core when I'm not in the gym.

The difference to my body is amazing. My arms look great with defined muscles, my tummy is flat with lines coming on well Legs starting to define muscles.
I am a bit obsessed with protein intake

But it makes you feel amazing - DD19 agrees, she lifts - I don't understand how but it makes me feel so confident. I walk taller somehow.

I totally understand your worries about your back. I suffered from back problems following pregnancy and felt scared of lifting any significant amount of weights. But eventually I decided to get a PT so my form was correct then try it. Since then, I've hardly had any back niggles - I've since learned that strengthening the bum and leg muscles takes the strain off your back.

I've never had any negative comments at the gym or felt like people were laughing at me or staring at me. Certainly if I see someone new who is obviously just starting out, I just think good for them!

So pleased you started this thread @blinder. Hope you didn’t mind me butting in for the extra Body Pump clarification and thank you to everyone for the explanation and encouragement. I’m going to give it a try.