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AIBU?

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Original poster

Do you dine out alone as a woman?

93 replies

HandbagsnGladrags · 04/05/2022 19:07

I currently am. I'm away on business, on my own. Sat in a restaurant, getting lots of 'looks' from people. Am perfectly happy on my own, reading my book til my food comes. Completely not giving a shit until I get sick of people staring. Also, they tried to show me to the shittest table in the place when there were loads of others free. I mean, I'm not that hideous that I need to be hidden away.

AIBU to think that a woman should be able to dine alone without any shame in 2022?

OP posts:
TheSillyMastiff · 04/05/2022 20:23

So I treat myself every now and again to a "date night" one important thing even though I'm single...I don't actually have a date or someone to sit with. 🤣

So I go to a lovely restaurant, I have some wine a nice meal, I always ask for window so I can sit and people watch.

I just watch the world go by, I enjoy my food, it's actually still hot whilst I am eating and I don't have to pause after every bite for "mummy" "DS please don't do that at the dinner table" "use your fork" 🤣

I love it. I cant say I have ever had any people stare at me, or maybe they have and I haven't noticed because I'm in my little bubble of peace.

NalPolishRemover · 04/05/2022 20:24

I love dining alone!
I travel fairly frequently with work & am well used to it.
I'm also fond of room service at the end of a busy day & blobbing out on the bed with tv & wine.
I've never once had anyone make a comment or stare at me in all the years either

pastabest · 04/05/2022 20:25

It's one of my most favourite things to do.

If the stars align and I have a childfree day to myself I will often go and eat somewhere by myself.

Pre children I did it more.

I've only once been treated a bit oddly and that was by a very enthusiastic waiter in a gastropub type place. I got the impression he possibly thought I was a secret diner/food critic though. He definitely wasn't paying the same attention to the other tables and it was so over the top.

purplecorkheart · 04/05/2022 20:25

Yup, do it all the time. I do normally have a book or something with me (to stop me being bored). I have had one or two attempts at giving me a bad table but I politely refuse and request the time I would like (two top). I also go to plays, films, exhibitions etc on my own. I like my own company at times.

In regards to people staring I think we all people watch in restaurants etc whether people are on their own or in a group. Sometimes when you are alone you can be a bit more concious of it but honestly most people don't give it a thought that you are on your own.

SleepingStandingUp · 04/05/2022 20:26

JudgeJ · 04/05/2022 19:27

Why do women feel the need to be doing something though, book, ipad, magazine etc.?

Show quote history

Because I don't want to sit still and silently at a table for twenty minutes waiting for my food staring at the centerpiece because people watching whilst they're eating is odd?

Lampzade · 04/05/2022 20:28

I always dine out on my own. I don’t even think about how it looks
Some of my happiest moments have been when I have been alone in a nice restaurant eating delicious food

RoseGoldEagle · 04/05/2022 20:29

I did this for years when I travelled loads for work, in my late 20s and early 30s. Never had any issues with it, unless I just didn’t notice the strange looks. Figured it’s pretty obvious to work out why I was there, and I needed to eat! 🤷‍♀️

Original poster
HandbagsnGladrags · 04/05/2022 20:29

I feel like I didn't fully appreciate my alone time after all these comments! Next time I will. Now where can I go for breakfast in the morning...

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 04/05/2022 20:30

Are you sure you haven’t got your skirt tucked in your pants? Is that why they are looking?

I’ve eaten out alone and genuinely never noticed any funny looks.

Whoatealltheminieggs · 04/05/2022 20:31

I have done. Never noticed anyone looking really.

Original poster
HandbagsnGladrags · 04/05/2022 20:31

BitOutOfPractice · 04/05/2022 20:30

Are you sure you haven’t got your skirt tucked in your pants? Is that why they are looking?

I’ve eaten out alone and genuinely never noticed any funny looks.

😆 am wearing jeans. Maybe I had bog roll trailing from my shoe

OP posts:
IcedPurple · 04/05/2022 20:32

I've done it countless times, in several countries. Never had an issue. I've certainly never got 'looks' from fellow diners.

DisforDarkChocolate · 04/05/2022 20:33

I love doing this, I can just chill out and don't have to make conversation with any one.

I used to notice people looking but not anymore. I do get shown to the crap tables though.

JoeGoldberg · 04/05/2022 20:36

I do it as much as finances/childcare allows. Love it. Never noticed any staring though!

Toddlerteaplease · 04/05/2022 20:38

Loads of time. No one has ever batted an eyelid.

Isitsixoclockalready · 04/05/2022 20:38

I don't think that it's necessarily a gender thing in that it's probably not the 'usual' thing for people to be eating alone whether it be male or female but I don't see why there should be any stigma about it. Sounds like a great idea!

Mellowyellow222 · 04/05/2022 20:39

I used to travel a lot with work and found it really easy - particularly in the big USA cities.

I do get the odd look in smaller uk cities - I assume they are people watching and making up a wonderful back story for me😂😂

MrsTWH · 04/05/2022 20:40

I absolutely love dining out alone, in peace! I do it all the time, in all sorts of different places and never once had an issue.

My DH on the other hand says he never would! I have no idea why not.

SofiaSoFar · 04/05/2022 20:42

I do it quite a lot - more so pre-Covid when I was travelling more on business.

I really enjoy it, if I'm honest. No one to please but myself, chance to relax and enjoy reading something or just enjoy the meal.

Can't say I've ever noticed people staring, unless maybe they're also looking around 'people watching' while dining alone.

ShinyPikachu · 04/05/2022 20:43

Í do it all the time. I go to pubs alone too if I fancy a drink, I never take a book with me but I'll read MN or FB or play a game on my phone.

I've never noticed looks or had anyone bother me. It helps me to recharge to get out the house by myself and just enjoy some time alone.

I started doing it when I was a single mum while DC were at primary school but I still do it now even though I've now remarried and both DC are teenagers (one has left school, other still at secondary).

sleezeandwineparty · 04/05/2022 20:44

Yes, I bloody love it, such a luxury I have done so since I was in my early 20's.
I don't have to be away, I will go out locally alone. I am married but sometimes it's just so relaxing to be alone eating something nice.

sleezeandwineparty · 04/05/2022 20:46

Never had a shitty look. I have had them not serve me... because they assume I am waiting for someone, but a smile and can I have a menu please soon sorts that out

JoeGoldberg · 04/05/2022 20:48

I also do coffee shop, cinema and occasionally pub alone. Honestly never had anyone bat an eyelid!

Pinklimey · 04/05/2022 20:52

Never felt any shame. No one gives a damn about me; I don't give a damn about anyone else. Felt a bit strange in the covid period as I was worried restaurants wouldn't want to give up a table to one person, but that soon passed.

borntobequiet · 04/05/2022 20:55

I’ve travelled on my own, eaten out on my own, gone to bars and pubs on my own for decades, in this country and abroad. No one takes any notice.