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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To really struggle changing DS’s nappy

68 replies

Holl90 · 04/05/2022 13:30

I feel like a complete failure, my DS is so so strong and he won’t lie down for his nappy to be changed. I put him on my knee and did it that way but he is so strong I really struggle to hold him still, it’s so hard sometimes it takes me a good 5 minutes to recover from it. I know this is AIBU but any mums had this challenge? Any resolutions? Not long until I can toilet train him I suppose. I get really frustrated and hate it if he does a poo if we are our because of how resistant he is and it looks like I can’t manage.

OP posts:
Foxglovesandlilacs86 · 04/05/2022 14:41

SNAFU247 · 04/05/2022 14:37

I used to put one foot gently but firmly on either of DS's armpits - my legs would then sort of be along his body and the pressure in armpit area meant he couldn't pivot his body easily to twist and crawl off. It worked quite well.... though looked really quite a picture if anyone happened to pass by!

I did this with my wriggly ones and it works a treat!

JenniferBarkley · 04/05/2022 15:24

Honestly, I find it a thousand times easier on a changing table - keeps them confined.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 04/05/2022 15:47

nearlyspringyay · 04/05/2022 14:21

Changing poo standing up depends a lot on the consistency of it! Mine had toddler diarreah...

I had to sit on the floor, head in my crotch, leg over chest and give them a high value item like keys, phone or a pack of wipes.

I'm trying to picture this and can't 😂

OP do it standing up, much easier. Or give him your phone for a minute.

ZuliKyanLarsFoz · 04/05/2022 15:48

I put our change mat on the floor and popped on a Hey Duggee episode... kept him still

DinoRock · 04/05/2022 15:53

JenniferBarkley · 04/05/2022 15:24

Honestly, I find it a thousand times easier on a changing table - keeps them confined.

This works until they stand up and start dancing and you're terrified they are going to fall off

IDontLikeMondays88 · 04/05/2022 15:56

I do it on the floor. If it’s just a wet nappy I let him stand up. If it’s 💩then he needs to lie down and I find reading a book/ singing or letting him fiddle with a favourite toy helps. Or a tv show to be honest. Hard when you are out somewhere but anyone with a toddler knows what you are going through 😅😅

IDontLikeMondays88 · 04/05/2022 15:58

I also had some success with sitting on the floor with my legs in a v shape with him facing away from me so with his head at my crotch. Meant he couldn’t really roll over but he doesn’t like it - screams!

KeepYaHeadUp · 04/05/2022 16:03

Have a novelty item (toy, keys, TV remote) and only let them play with during bum changes!

Blossombouquet · 04/05/2022 16:05

My ds went through this stage.

I second what southlonder02 said:

give him something to hold/play with that he wouldn’t normally get

ZenKaleidoscope · 04/05/2022 16:06

Have you tried giving him a toy to mess with while you change his nappy?

DressingGownofDoom · 04/05/2022 16:24

If you're with family they should be helping you! If I have company I issue a call to arms for nappy change helpers!

ChocolateHippo · 04/05/2022 16:34

Leg over middle. Be brutal and don't feel guilty... the quicker you do it, the quicker it's over for him.

Alternatively, Peppa Pig on YouTube on my phone used to work a treat with my DC when we were out and about and I had to keep it fairly civilised.

Burgerqueenbee · 04/05/2022 16:42

This has become a daily struggle since my dd started crawling (she never bothered to roll over when she couldn't get anywhere) and it's ages until potty training stage for us. I'm dreading having to change a poo while out and about.

FoxtrotSkarloey · 04/05/2022 16:51

With DC1 I used to pop my leg over him to get him gently still. With DC2 I'm exhausted. Even that fight is tiring. She gets my phone for 5 mins. It's done quickly without tantrums and we're all much happier for it.

FilthyforFirth · 04/05/2022 16:52

I struggle to change DSs nappy on my own and nursery have commented that it always takes two. My DS is not quite 18 months yet. I find him almost freakishly strong!

No solutions, just solodarity. I will be potty training asap..

MassiveSalad22 · 04/05/2022 16:53

I never understand why pull ups are meant to be easier, doesn’t that involve taking trousers (and shoes??) off too?? I think I’m missing something. I just either do it while they’re standing up or have them lying down in front of me and pin them down by the arm pits with my feet if really necessary.

Bumbers · 04/05/2022 16:54

This thread has made me feel so much better. I am struggling so much to change DS's (17 months) nappy So glad it isn't just me.

Bornin1989 · 04/05/2022 16:54

Haha I'm glad you posted this, it's what I needed to read today and I definitely don't judge you! My DD has just turned 7 months, she's had constipation for a couple of days so I gave her stewed pears. MY GOD THE POO, it kept coming, and coming, and coming. Meanwhile she was rolling, then weeing, and I was wrestling to keep her still, giving her a toy to hold... Then she wee'd again after I'd cleaned her up and put new clothes on her, then the poo started AGAIN.

I cried afterwards, it was horrific 😅😂

doadeer · 04/05/2022 17:02

My son is a massive 3.5 year old and in nappies (he has additional needs), you are stronger than you realise. If he is really pushing then yes leg over his torso, have all the wipes ready so you can be really fast. I do lots standing up aswell.

FlamingoOrange · 04/05/2022 17:10

Does he have a song he likes? Both my kids had a song they loved as toddlers (DS1: wheels on the bus, DS2: that annoying Daddy finger song); I could make them comply with most stuff they hated if I sung the favourite song in the most excited voice I could manage.

AliasGrape · 04/05/2022 17:17

MassiveSalad22 · 04/05/2022 16:53

I never understand why pull ups are meant to be easier, doesn’t that involve taking trousers (and shoes??) off too?? I think I’m missing something. I just either do it while they’re standing up or have them lying down in front of me and pin them down by the arm pits with my feet if really necessary.

Yes!

Especially when out somewhere. If we’re at home and she’s in a dress with no leggings or anything then they’re easier but otherwise no. We do use them though as she seems a lot comfier in them, but they’re not particularly easier.

EmilyBolton · 04/05/2022 17:22

DinoRock · 04/05/2022 13:41

Nightmare isn't it. Have you tried giving him something to look at while you change him? A book?

This. Distraction.
give him a toy or Get him to say nursery rhymes or sing song with You whilst you’re doing it. I even used to do a game of who could be most silent for longest ..hard not to make a noise squealing when thrashing around..or playing “statues” . Right now he is playing the game of I am in control by refusing to stay still and his attention is on that. Distract with something of your choice instead.

But also Tell him before you start, what you are going to do once you have finished- make it something nice even if for a few minutes of a game or cuddling or something- tell him if he lies still to change his nappy will be done so quickly and you can get on with the fun activity you’ve told him about. In other words reward him for being still. If he doesn’t stay still then warn him “fun “ thing won’t be possible as he’s taking too long and 3 warnings then withdraw fun activity- hopeful he’ll soon catch on soon.

don’t wait for potty training …bad habits of not sitting still to be changed will mean he doesn’t want to sit on potty either potentially and you’re storing up issues with the whole piece around toileting when it is on his terms only. With pre school kids you’ve got to be able to tell them to use toilet when there is an opportunity even if they don’t feel like it, just so there isn’t accidents or frantic running about Trying to find a toilet when you are out and about.

spiderlight · 04/05/2022 17:25

You can rip the sides of pull-ups to take them off - you don't have to pull them down like pants, so trousers/shoes can stay on (don't ask me how long it took me to realise this 😳).

What worked with mine during his super-wriggly phase was to give him two toys to hold, one in each hand. Use soft toys, though, in case he drops them onto his face (again, don't ask me how I know this 😳)

swashbucklecheer · 04/05/2022 17:25

I kept the shoes and trousers on and used the crotch of the trousers as a handle to pull back both legs at the same time. They couldn't wriggle too far and if they did twist pulling the legs up a bit higher meant they didn't move much further.

MassiveSalad22 · 04/05/2022 18:12

spiderlight · 04/05/2022 17:25

You can rip the sides of pull-ups to take them off - you don't have to pull them down like pants, so trousers/shoes can stay on (don't ask me how long it took me to realise this 😳).

What worked with mine during his super-wriggly phase was to give him two toys to hold, one in each hand. Use soft toys, though, in case he drops them onto his face (again, don't ask me how I know this 😳)

Yes I get that, but then how do you get the new one on without taking the trousers off?? Pull ups are like pants aren’t they? I don’t get it 😂