To be nervous about explaining my daughters injury.

[Elephant193]

I'm a regular poster and have been here for years but NC for the purpose of this post. I feel a bit silly, but I have anxiety and we all know how irrational that can be.

My just turned 3 year old DD wanted to sleep in her happy napper sleeping bag last night, she got it for her birthday and has been obsessed with them for months.

I put her inside it and zipped it up but as she's a tiny little thing she was too low down so i lifted her up by her wrists to bring her out of the bag a bit. Big mistake.

Long story short I've hurt her wrist in the process 😞

I'm certain it's not broken and there's no swelling but she says it hurts to touch so may well be sprained. I'm going to have to have it checked out today regardless so have told nursery she won't be in and why, I just can't shake the fear that somebody is going to think I've deliberately tried to hurt her and make a referral to social services on the grounds that I've told them it's my fault?

Am I being irrational? Am I going to get into trouble?

In and out of A&E in 20 minutes?! Wow how times have changed. I was there for 6 hrs when my toddler had a sprain. Waiting. Just waiting.

Speaking if which if you are a middle-aged or older adult who plays rugby then please stop and get a hobby suit ale for your age, at least 3 adults in the queue in front of us for x-rays all had broken bones playing rugby.

Don't worry about it and no from how you've described it absolutely no need to goto A&E! (to the poster saying 'goto A&E FFS' can you imagine - "yes i'd like you to check my child's wrist, they say it's fine now, there's absolutely no sign of any injury and they're perfectly happy, but I'd like it checked out none the less just in case you someone thinks I'm neglectful).

Just as you mention you're a bit anxious regards stuff like this- You say you just picked them up by the wrists, this is very small force, unlikely to cause any damage. Children hang from their arms all day, people swing children around and around by their hands, bodies can take this kind of force all day. Injuries tend to occur from sudden jolts in a new direction or falling onto a limb (like an outstretched hand), especially if it pushes it in a direction it wouldn't normally go.

If you're pondering whether your child has an actual injury that needs checking - distraction works well, don't just keep asking them if it still hurts give them a drink, play a game. If they're really injured they're likely to guard the limb, avoid using it, or be very difficult to distract. If they do do these things, and they are consistently difficult to distract or avoiding use of the limb, or it looks abnormally swollen then these are absolutely the kinds of injuries that should be checked by a medical professional.

If you do present to be checked deliberate injuries in children will always be considered as routine assessment however there are particular injury patterns that occur normally and those that differ and tend to be deliberate. If A&E are asked to check a wrist or ankle following a fall/play related incident it's unlikely to cause suspicion and not something that should put you off attending.

Children are out to stress you. As a toddler I ran into a chair and cut my head open...no big deal, just needed a few butterfly stitches from A&E...but it was New Years Day and my mum said she felt so shamefaced cause she was sure everyone thought she was hungover/drunk and not caring for me. She was entirely sober and not hung over. I was just a little eejit who didn't look where I was going!

If it makes you feel any better DP I was once carrying my son, who was 6 months old at the time, down the stairs. I slipped and he left my arms and fell all the way down the stairs! I was distraught, we went to A&E and I had to explain... but he was fine! It's hard to say from a distance of course but your DC sounds melodramatic!

If you do take her, be very honest and accurate about how it happened. My concern wouldn't be abuse, it would be that pulling her up a bit by her wrists would be enough to injure her, maybe her joints need to be checked.

You can still break a small bone in the wrist and the wrist is still moveable. My youngest slipped over in a gym class and landed on his hand. I found my husband trying to stuff him into jacket the next day to take him to school when he was complaining about a sore arm. I swear there must be something missing in male DNA or maybe it's wanting to get off to play golf rather than waiting around at the doctors. I took my son to the GP who said it was probably sprained but they were okay if I took him off to be x-rayed. He had the wrist x-rayed and the person doing it said that on her screen it didn't look like a break but the radiologist would review it. We got home and then got a telephone call that there was a break. Then it was off to the fracture clinic for plastering. The plaster apparently reduced the pain. So a broken bone is not necessarily obvious.

My mum dislocated my shoulder by pulling me back hard to stop me walking in front of a car when I was 3. I remember it clearly, one of my earliest memories. I don’t blame my mum! She did it with the very best of intentions, these things happen OP, don’t worry and tell the truth.

My dad shut my hand in a car door when I was 5. Technically, that is what happened but in reality, I was sitting in the back seat and I demanded to close the door myself. He said no and warned me to keep my hands tucked in safely, but I went to grab the handle as he closed the door. Bang - broken finger.

My mum's friend's husband was play-wrestling with their son and his previously wobbly tooth came out, so he told his teaching that his dad "kicked him in the face and knocked his teeth out"

Basically, kids get hurt all the time and they're shit at nuanced storytelling

My DD was about 3 when she dislocated her elbow trying to twist away from her big sister who was trying to bring her to me as she had a dirty nappy. It was back in quickly and the hospital said it is a common injury, often from parents trying to protect their children from, for example, trying to run across the road.

Like many others here, I’ve done something very similar!
When DC1 was 2, she was walking up the stairs carrying her story for bedtime, I was carrying newborn DC2. DC1 lost her footing, dropped the book and turned quickly to see where it had gone, very nearly swan diving head first down the stairs. I only had one hand available, so grabbed her by the arm to stop her falling. At bedtime she was saying it hurt, there was no swelling or anything, and she went to sleep. Next morning she still said it hurt, and would use that arm. I took her to the hospital, absolutely terrified that they’d think I was abusing my kid 😨😨
The nurse who saw us couldn’t have been more brilliant. She called it “pulled elbow”. She said it’s a really common injury in young children, and 9 times out of 10 it’s caused by the parent trying to stop them from hurting themselves more severely! Or by playing the game where a child is holding two adults’ hands and swings through the middle by their arms. She quickly popped it back into place, without even a whimper from DC1 and we were on our merry way, never heard anything more about it.

I did this! DS was falling down the stairs and I grabbed his wrist to stop him and dislocated his elbow. I cried far more than he did!