Hi,
I don't know where to start really. Just last night got to me and I am still feeling.
I had a great day with my girls friends - rarely get any time to myself. Non of us were drinking, we just had a walk and chat and some fun. My partner was there with the kids, but left me to it to have some social time.
We then returned home to host a buffet and prepare for that for 12 people.
We got chatting at the buffet and someone asked me about my job. I said I am now having to travel about once a month (I had mentioned this to my fiancé that I will travel once in May, once in June, once in July and once in September.) I didn't think anything of it until....
My partner and I were alone and he said, it would be nice for you to tell me things. I said like what? He said like you travelling away with work every month. I said I told you that. He said, well I didn't think you would be travelling every month. I said well I am for the next five months, except for august. He said well you never said that at the party, you said every month. I said well, I never got to finish my sentence as someone asked me a question. He said that he felt he was being kept out of the loop.
He then said I never mentioned a medical appointment last week. I said I did and we had a two way conversation about it. I could even tell him where we were when we had the conversation. However, he was so wrapped up and consumed in his emails on our day out when we had the conversation, he probably won't remember and he often doesn't remember our conversations or the childrens. He remembers everything for work though but not enough headspace for us at home. I find that if I don't text him with the info, he makes out I am lying and didn't tell him. He doesn't consider that he forgot.
Instead he said that as always I am always right and I always know where the conversation was and what was said etc etc. he shouted at me. Interesting that this was when everyone else had gone home and so had his kids, it was just me and my kids at home.
He was then all smiles when his son came home with his girlfriend, like nothing had happened.
I feel from his outburst that he is annoyed and maybe a little paranoid that I will be travelling with work. He travels with work once a month too and I often don't hear from him when he is away. Yet that's ok, but seems different for me.
Just to point out that he also cheated on me for almost a year with a work colleague from 2019 until 2020 when I caught them out.
Maybe he thinks I will cheat on him.
He just gets so angry with me. And nit picks on my words.
Feel like I have to think very carefully about how I word and say things. And should you ever disagree with him, you are wrong.
E.g. my son wants a PC and not a laptop. My fella got so annoyed with him because he wouldn't shift on his decision.
I am reading into something that isn't there?
Is he overreacting or am I?
Sometimes not sure what's normal any more....