AIBU about DH’s photos on phone

60 replies

RoseA89 · 30/04/2022 18:34

Hi all,

My DH and I were talking about photos of ex’s on phones. DH has children from a previous marriage. He said all his photos of his ex were deleted. However, I have just found out today that he still has hundreds of photos of his ex wife on his phone. Some with the children, some on her own and some of the two of them. Also has photos of pregnancy tests when they were trying to have a baby. I’m really hurt by this. Should I confront him or am I being too sensitive?

Thank you.

OP posts:

HippeePrincess · 30/04/2022 21:26

How old is his phone?! You can’t have been together long if he still has ex and kids on his phone.

ChateauxNeufDePoop · 30/04/2022 21:31

HippeePrincess · 30/04/2022 21:26

How old is his phone?! You can’t have been together long if he still has ex and kids on his phone.

I don't know how non-Apple phones work these days but I've had my current iPhone less than a week and have photos going back to 2012 on it as that was when I got my first iPhone - when you get a new one you just transfer your backup across. There's lots of apps for storing photos these days so you can always have them on your current phone.

MaryBeardsShoes · 30/04/2022 21:40

Sometimes my phone syncs with my computer and I end up with every photo I've ever taken on a phone connected to my iCloud account on there, and I don't realise it until I'm looking back for something specific. Could that be what happened here?

DressingGownofDoom · 30/04/2022 21:43

It's not really normal to be looking through old photos on each other's phones.
I have photos of dinners from 7 years ago on my phone. I've got thousands of photos and cannot be arsed going through and deleting them. Doesn't mean those meals meant a lot to me. Well, some of them I do look back fondly on actually (hospital chicken salad 😄)

LampLighter414 · 30/04/2022 22:10

He may have gone to his camera gallery and deleted photos he had taken on his phone but these other photos you have found may have been say the ones WhatsApp automatically downloads when you receive photos

gianaInfertilitySucks · 30/04/2022 23:06

Well of course he has photos of his life before you. Of course he kept photos of the tests they took while ttc. Also, his ex wife, will always be the mother of his children, and will always be family.

Chakraleaf · 30/04/2022 23:07

I have never deleted old pics. It would take FAR too long and no point pretending that time in my life didn't happen!

PlasticineMeg · 30/04/2022 23:08

I find it to be a massive red flag when someone expects their partner to pretend his former life and relationships never happened. Especially when children are involved. Positive pregnancy tests are nothing to do with you, you have no right to be mad about that.

PlasticineMeg · 30/04/2022 23:08

Also a big red flag to automatically make the ex the enemy. You ‘won’ him, she doesn’t want him anymore, the end.

Feelingoktoday · 01/05/2022 07:19

redskyatnight · 30/04/2022 18:44

So you don't think it's appropriate for him to have photos of his ex. Therefore his choices are

Delete all photos

Don't delete all photos and lie about it to keep the peace.

I think your requirement that he does (1) is too strict, so can see why he went with (2)

Exactly this. I would have done the same.

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