To think my DC is too clever for state secondary school?

[GeniusCreator]

DC is Yr7. Top of year according to what I’ve been told. Read the full series of Harry Potter books by 7 years old. Excels in STEM subjects. Spends ages at home researching science stuff like quantum field theory and nuclear fusion/fission and enjoys it! Designs his own websites and writes his own code for his own games. Primary school were always pretty amazed by him. Secondary school have picked up on him now and have said they’ve never seen anything like him.

He’s already mentioning being a bit bored in class. We live in what could be described as a deprived town and are not well off, no family to help out, so would never be able to get him into a private school. I did check with the private school in the next town but there are no scholarships available.

WIBU to try to crowdfund for private school fees?

He needs a much higher level curriculum than the state school one to continue stretching him. I honestly think he’s destined for amazing things.

<only slightly light hearted>

Is that right that I can ask to have him moved up a year? He’s one of the youngest in the his current year though (August birthday).

Most schools will suggest this if they believe it’s the right thing to do. As they haven’t said anything then it may be for a reason.

Why not speak to them and see what they say.

I think you just need to focus on giving him opportunities outside of school and start saving for secondary school or think about moving closer to a grammar school.

@LilacPoppy - I was about to say exactly the same thing.

I as a reasonably robust adult found the last Harry Potter book fairly disturbing...

I would never allow a seven-year-old to read it.

Have you read it yourself @GeniusCreator ?
What did you think to it?

[I call wind up]

I think it is possible, in a way, to be "too clever" for state school, as obnoxious as it sounds. Schools are really stretched and don't always have the capacity to differentiate to help those at the extremes reach their potential with 30 children in a class and a full on curriculum. He would survive, but would be be pushed to reach his full potential?

I went to a streamed private school and it meant the v academic children could really work at pace which was great. I also had a 75% scholarship. I would explore bursaries and scholarships slightly further afield. Or consider self-directee home learning. I would not crowdfund!

I will also say I have a fairly average career because academia came easily to me and I never really learned the value of hard graft, being pushed so much at school meant that when I left and had no one to push me I floundered. Your son sounds quite different though.

Most private schools offer bursaries up to 100%.
Approach a school you think would suit him, and tell them all about your ds.
They will snap him up.

Are you suggesting crowdfunding several years of independent school fees?
Do you genuinely think people are going to donate that - especially if their own children are at state schools?
Seems unrealistic imho.
Most people would place that in the CF category.

I don't think that the answer is likely to be in a private school given the difficulties with fees and the lack of scholarships.

Is the school prepared to stretch him? I was a very bright child, I had finished the school library by about the age of 8, and was always top of my year. My first secondary school wasn't prepared to stretch me - their solution to my being bored in maths was to give me hundreds and hundreds of times tables questions. We ended up moving across the country so my parents could afford a house in the catchment of a decent state school. I wasn't moved up a year in that school, but I was allowed to do my maths GCSE a year early, did an extra maths qualification, extra curricular GCSEs in my spare time, philosophy club and other things to stretch me like a gifted and talented summer school and a regional extra curricular maths class for gifted students on a Saturday for a while. I was reading about relativity at the age of 11.

I went to Cambridge and was broadly average there, which was something of a novelty.

I guess what I'm saying is, keep him interested through secondary school by looking into extra curricular stuff, seeing if there is a teacher who is prepared to stretch him and talk to him about the things that interest him.

Do you feel you can have a conversation with him about the things he's interested in where you can use the discussion to continue to ensure his interest is piqued and to guide him into continuing to stretch himself? I think having someone to set the world to rights with and talk about mad and complicated things is often all you really need. I used to talk about time travel and how maybe faster than light travel, if it were possible would allow it and is that more or less likely than wormholes, and other things that veered heavily between science fact and science fiction but that mad intersection was what interested me most. Then I had friends who we designed ecologically friendly living communities with - it doesn't really matter what the thing is, it's just about exploring, researching, learning and repeat.

I didn't end up going into academia, but the way my brain works makes me pretty good at my job and I've found a niche that works for me.

I’d actually focus on supporting his mental health. I was like your son, I went to an awful school and I was an outlier for them. I was “the gifted kid” I did 6 A levels! And got a 1st class degree.

i am still suffering from burnout now. I actually wish that my school and parents had pushed me to have more hobbies and be more well rounded. Academia is all I know and it can be miserable.

You need to ensure he doesn’t become a perfectionist and builds resilience. Gifted kid burnout is real

Sorry you lost me here. My 8 year old has read them all and I don't consider her a genius.

Look at scholarships at private schools near you, if your child is that advanced then they'll be eligible.

Look into a scholarship or bursary for grammar/private schools. If he truly is a genius he’ll be snapped up in no time

I’m not getting this. Do you not believe the OP? I do believe the op, mainly as my DS was capable, although he didn’t read the latter books because I didn’t let him, He had however read the hobbit and was discussing it by 7 as his class teacher was reading it and he was interested in it. He’d actually read most of LOTR by 7 and had already asked for the silmarillion.

You only managed a few pages of Harry Potter at a time? They’re not very hard to read. I read them in primary school and I was pretty average at reading.

www.etoncollege.com/admissions/scholarships-and-awards/kings-scholarships/

Oh and also mine are both in primary school but both doing advanced classes in maths and reading. Again, they're not geniuses, they're just slightly ahead of the curve.

I was like this with maths in year 7 and 8, they thought I'd sit my GCSE's early and I ended up with a B 🤣

Your child shouldn't be 'too clever' for a state secondary but you may need to have a conversation as pp have suggested, on how you and they can work together to ensure he reaches his full potential and (as pp have also pointed out) develops his friendships and extra curricular activities.

Oh dear. I've actually met and worked with parents like you. I'd suggest that you surrender yourself to social work now as you're not doing your child any good at all.

Move to an area with a good school. Crowd funding is not likely to cover his uniform never mind school fees.

Meh, my 7yo read Deathly Hallows when it came out (he was waiting for it). Doesn't seem to have done him any harm. He was far more exercised over the fate of K9 in School Reunion.

He's at A Top University now doing a STEM subject.

OP, does your child play an instrument (or two)? Does he play chess? Does he do sudoku, or logic problems, or cryptic crosswords? Does he do change-ringing? Does he do a martial art? a team sport? Does he know Latin? Polish? Welsh? Punjabi? Can he make a hollandaise?

(My "genius" - according to his maths teacher - did some of those.)

I've always felt that if a child is that bright, they should be able to come up with a way to not be bored in class. Use that massive brain to work out how to get the other kids to like you, without annoying the teachers (must admit I never managed that bit myself... but then, I also never complained of being bored).

Ah you must be joking. Crowd funding for your extra clever child? 🤣

If the school are aware he's likely to get nines and are prepared to push him, then I wouldn't worry about Private Education. A decent secondary has a really supportive education system. Private schools are often full of kids whose parents are paying so their kids do well. Those who are intelligent get sent to State schools or grammar because it's free so only the kids who might do badly get the investment.

You would be unreasonable to crowdfund private school. Nothing you mention is extraordinary to me, and I also need to warn you that kids develop at different rates and you may find your genius isn't so far ahead by 16. My DD's school kept pushing us to apply for scholarships but we didn't want her to board. Just offer your child enrichment at home and remember to let them be a kid too

Crowdfund for private school fees

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I've taught children out of year in secondary school, but they've always been moved up in primary school - it's unusual for primaries to keep truly exceptional children in their year. And it's also unusual for secondaries to move them up because of all the social reasons already mentioned. State schools vary (as do independents) and if he's in mixed ability sets, the pace can be slow in Y7. Private schools can be the answer, but not always. There is more to school than just academic stuff.

Please don't. All you friends and family with thing you're that parent.

Your son sounds great but in the kindest way if you struggle to read HP books yourself then maybe he is just clever compared to you.
He sounds bright but maybe not enough to move up a year or get a scholarship.

Definitely encourage reading and other activities like music lessons but as a PP said don’t push him too hard.

Having top grades means nothing if like many students he ends up breaking down and throwing it all away because the pressure got too much.

Sorry to say he’s great socially. Has a big group of boy/girl friends. Very well liked by all. They’re all always happy to see him. I was very worried before he started secondary but he’s had no problems. He’s extremely polite, helpful and kind. He’s in various school committees with older DC. His friends call him Mr Smart, very accepting. I’ve read his WhatsApp messaging where he’ll talk about random science stuff and they’ll be 🤣.

He prefers to stay at home on weekends. thinks it pointless hanging around the street or a park, but will go on activities like the trampoline park or the climbing wall place. He’s always been very articulate from a young age. Had no problem ordering stuff himself in McDs etc from being a toddler. Could always speak very confidently to adults. He’s a complete anomaly in our family (we have 3 older DC).

I have another DC with SEND. Why do you think he has some @Onwards22?

I guess I just think I’m doing him a disservice not trying to help him reach his full potential.

I take the point about private school perhaps not being more academically stretching either.

Will speak to school about how they can move him up either in year group (his age 16 trousers are flapping above his ankles so he wouldn’t stand out as smaller) or any other way.