Why why why do people have kids without marriage

[changedandcantchangeback]

Obviously if you earn more.. have an independent income... so NOT aimed at you..

But WHY after all these years do I see threads from economically improvised women STILL posting how they are so severely compromised ?

I am not, was never tied to the prick. I walked away, his version of fighting for his child was back in the day when you got a free solicitors letter.
I changed my number, still live in the same house now as I did then, he has never knocked my door.
I now have an amazing adult son who I have never regretted. I wouldn't even change meeting his dad or I'd never have my son.

@Robinni that’s not at all what you said above.your post was all about how women were selling themselves short by being with poor men!

what are you “protecting yourself” from by marriage to a lower earner?

People's individual experiences do not trump the fact that not marrying is inherently unstable.

It's just yeah but, whataboutism.

And marrying is stable??

42% divorce rate in the UK

@Villagewaspbyke to reiterate there is a difference between a low earner and a deadbeat - I was talking about the latter.

For example, a man who does not want to earn and accumulate anything. Who is predominately on very low paid work sporadically and who when given the opportunity to buy their child a Christmas present spends the money on drugs. That is what I meant and you can accept that or not.

Why would anyone want that?!

@Felix0204 put out this ridiculous assertion for somebody without assets marriage is unimportant. However most people low/med/high earners accumulate something in the end. And in any event there are death benefits due if your spouse dies so that at least is something to help with funeral costs.

re. Protection - in the event of divorce we both take what we put in, in the event of my death I want a good chunk of my money going to my DC. We have life insurance policies. I am organising my business so my DH and I have a pension income. That sort of thing… and I don’t really see why we should have to justify that? Shouldn’t everyone be doing this sort of thing?!

Isn’t that what this thread is about really, that people don’t think about what may potentially happen in future and don’t have sufficient legal protections?

@speakout

Vs 90% cohabitation split rate.🙄😂

Also for anyone in a council house - rights to remain in the house are different for married vs unmarried… Particularly if tenancy started before 2012… can’t actually believe this. Came to mind as we had a relative who passed on their house to DGC when they died.

england.shelter.org.uk/housing_advice/council_housing_association/can_you_inherit_a_council_tenancy

True but it's a man's world still. Most women get harassed bullied etc etc at work and don't earn as much as men still. It's even harder if you are mixed or poc like me what with all the racism in the world.

I cannot bear the thought of being married OP.
HTH

This thread is 18 months old!

Current trends in the UK suggest that the proportion of women choosing to remain childfree is expected to rise significantly, reaching 45% by 2040, according to reports.

So, the trend of having children outside of marriage is expected to decline.
However, as others have pointed out: "Why do women have children before establishing themselves in a career, having a plan to manage childcare to continue that career, and having an exit plan should they ever need it?"

I think this has a lot to do with it. People are staggered when you say there's no such thing.

Zombie thread.

Because they don’t think they can demand more.