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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbour knocked on our door and had a go...

167 replies

Daisycat76 · 25/04/2022 19:37

Not sure what to think of this.... DP and I moved into a new neighbourhood a few weeks ago. It's a fairly affluent area, detached houses etc. Anyway we had visitors over the weekend staying for 2 days, and DP wanted to move our car so the visitors could park on the drive. He parked the car on the street opposite. Wasn't blocking anyone's drive, or parked in an illegal or obstructive way. He parked it there Friday lunch time.

Saturday evening neighbour we've never met came knocking on the door, and without introducing himself just started having a go at us for parking our car there. He didn't ask us to move it or explain why it bothered him - just immediately started ranting that we're "disrespecting our neighbours" and "we don't give a s*". We said we haven't done anything wrong, it's legal to park on any road as long as it's not blocking a driveway. He accepted it's not illegal but it's not acceptable anyway. Said we "should have realized" it would upset him!!

DP then said sorry I'll move it, I didn't mean to upset you and we'd like to keep good relations with you. The guy just kept having a go, and eventually went "well you have upset me, welcome to the neighbourhood" and stormed off.

I'm not being unreasonable here, right? Would you go and have a go at your neighbours for parking a car outside your house for a couple of days?? I keep overthinking it, is it rude to park outside someone's house?

OP posts:
Melkam · 25/04/2022 20:15

I would order a ton of topsoil when he (and his wife) are at work and have it dumped on his drive. Would be worth the money.

SirChenjins · 25/04/2022 20:16

Agree with @lassof - it really depends on the street. We live in a small cul de sac, everyone has a drive for two or three cars, and any visitors use the 4 communal spaces or park outside the house they’re visiting. It would be really weird to park outside a neighbours house. Otoh, we’ve lived in busy streets where you basically park where there’s a space.

If your street is more like our cul de sac setup, there a reason you couldn’t park outside your own house?

PissedOffNeighbour22 · 25/04/2022 20:20

It would be rude everywhere I've lived, but no way would I go and have a go at someone. Personally I'd park over my own drive rather than annoy other people by parking in front of their house.

I did once have a run in with a neighbour off the next street who had a go at me after she parked in front of my house. Apparently I'd looked at her house when we pulled up so she came out ranting and hurling abuse. She threatened to reverse into our car too. I guess some neighbours are just ridiculous and petty so are best avoided.

Your neighbour seems unhinged so I think you were right not to aggravate him more as you don't know what he's capable of.

AlternativePerspective · 25/04/2022 20:20

Does he have a driveway? Because if not then presumably everyone has to park on the street, in which case parking outside his house is inconsiderate.

Round here it’s a nightmare at school run time where everyone parks outside the people’s houses meaning that if anyone actually wanted to park outside their own house they couldn’t.

If there’s a driveway then it’s different because they have actual parking on their property. But if they don’t then while he was obviously somewhat OTT in knocking the door to have a pop it’s really good manners to ask if you can park outside his house.

I don’t even have a car and people still ask if it’s ok to park outside mine.

MiniCooperLover · 25/04/2022 20:23

lassof · 25/04/2022 19:59

It would definitely be rude where I live to park your car outside anyone else's house. If we do it, we ask first and explain why it's necessary.
Obviously it is perfectly legal, but it does really piss people off and a polite knock to ask doesn't cost anything.
In a busier street, maybe terraces or semis close together, that wouldn't perhaps be the norm as it just wouldn't be possible.
Anyway, his reaction was ott so now you know who to watch out for! Welcome to the neighborhood.

See now I can't agree with this at all! It doesn't matter how busy, quiet, short or wide the road is. Unless there is a dropped kerb prohibiting parking then no one owns the space outside their home and pandering to this nonsense of knocking and asking is just asking for issues

Wouldyabeguilty · 25/04/2022 20:23

Wow, what a welcome. Absolute gimp!

NurseBernard · 25/04/2022 20:27

The guy’s an absolute whack job who needs to get a little perspective.

But, why did you park your car opposite? And not just on the road outside your place?

Veryverycalmnow · 25/04/2022 20:28

I've seen signs near us saying 'thank you for allowing me to park in front of my own house!!!' with words underlined in a passive aggressive way. People can be quite possessive over tarmac. Glad I don't have a car! Good luck.

LubaLuca · 25/04/2022 20:29

Of course it's not rude to park anywhere that's legal and safe. This bellend probably gets pissed off with people sitting on his favourite bench in the park, or going to his favourite till in the supermarket.

I have no idea what makes people get so possessive about things they don't possess 😕

Babyiwantabump · 25/04/2022 20:30

He’s a twat . My neighbor once came and knocked my door and told me to move my car as it was “ruining his view” !
we live on a normal street with houses either side and he was just being a mither .

fallfallfall · 25/04/2022 20:30

i know that the road is public and parking is allowed BUT parking in front of someone's home that you are not visiting is a huge no no in my neighborhood.
enough so that when city employees were working a wooded area behind our house they asked permission. just last week a group of 4 young men parked in front of our home, knocked and asked permission, told us where they were hiking and when they would be back which was greatly appreciated. so i'd say it's the culture where i live to not park in front of someone's home who you do not know.

Cheesecakeandwineinasuitcase · 25/04/2022 20:31

This happened to us. The guy didn’t have any rights the the road outside his house. It was on street parking. He gobbled on our car and tucked a snotty tissue under the windscreen wiper. Vile man 😡

Lem0nDrizzle · 25/04/2022 20:31

Aye he's a creep. Keep your blinds closed

Original poster
Daisycat76 · 25/04/2022 20:31

chesirecat99 · 25/04/2022 20:11

As much as you are entitled to park anywhere on the street, is there a reason why your DH parked opposite your house instead of outside your house? It's a bit cheeky to park outside someone else's house if you can park outside your own.

We don't have any space outside our house - the way it sits on the corner of the road means we'd be blocking someone else's drive by doing that.

OP posts:
Cheesecakeandwineinasuitcase · 25/04/2022 20:31

*gobbled - I meant gobbed! 😂

LoveAllCakes · 25/04/2022 20:32

Typical village mentality from hearing very similar stories from friends who moved into a village environment.

MigsandTiggs · 25/04/2022 20:32

I think there's a difference between what is legally right and what has developed through custom and practice. YANBU, but let's be honest, if you were accustomed to parking your car on the street in front of your house you'd probably be pissed off if a new neighbour parked in "your spot". Good on you for not losing your temper with the dickhead, his response was ott and unwarranted. I'd now be as nice as pie to him, while secretly laughing. It's amazing what creatures of habits we can become.

Original poster
Daisycat76 · 25/04/2022 20:32

AlternativePerspective · 25/04/2022 20:20

Does he have a driveway? Because if not then presumably everyone has to park on the street, in which case parking outside his house is inconsiderate.

Round here it’s a nightmare at school run time where everyone parks outside the people’s houses meaning that if anyone actually wanted to park outside their own house they couldn’t.

If there’s a driveway then it’s different because they have actual parking on their property. But if they don’t then while he was obviously somewhat OTT in knocking the door to have a pop it’s really good manners to ask if you can park outside his house.

I don’t even have a car and people still ask if it’s ok to park outside mine.

He does have a driveway and a garage!

OP posts:
Minkmonk · 25/04/2022 20:33

What an absolute weirdo. I couldn't give a rats arse whose house it's in front of. The PUBLIC road is very much that. Do it again and next time tell him to fuck off to the countryside on a private estate with gated access if he's that bothered. It has absolutely nothing to do with courtesy, not his road so not your problem.

Mabiscuit · 25/04/2022 20:34

Our neighbours are lovely until a trades person needs to park on the road for less than an hour. Then we see a nasty side to a couple of them. We rarely have visitors so don't have many confrontations. After a decade I still can't get used to this weird behaviour and entitlement to a public road.

Duchess379 · 25/04/2022 20:36

Are you on an estate? Yeah, it's annoying having a car parked up outside your house for days but as you say, it's not illegal. I just look at it that's it's the bank holiday & people are going to have guests visit.
Batshit neighbourhood clearly doesn't have enough going in in his life so gets all twisted about a bit of parking. Ignore him, he's a dick.

LoveAllCakes · 25/04/2022 20:36

chesirecat99 · 25/04/2022 20:11

As much as you are entitled to park anywhere on the street, is there a reason why your DH parked opposite your house instead of outside your house? It's a bit cheeky to park outside someone else's house if you can park outside your own.

The thing is, it really isn’t @chesirecat99

a1poshpaws · 25/04/2022 20:37

lassof

It would definitely be rude where I live to park your car outside anyone else's house

Where on earth do you live? Any time I've ever lived in a town, it's been everyone for themselves - even in a street that requires permit parking, they sell more permits than there are spaces, and it's basically been a free for all.

pictish · 25/04/2022 20:39

“DP then said sorry I'll move it, I didn't mean to upset you and we'd like to keep good relations with you.”

Did he? In the face of this rude, self-entitled, petty arsehole? What a drip. Even I would have sent the bugger packing.

LubaLuca · 25/04/2022 20:40

I'm not sure what I'd say to someone at my door telling me they'd parked near my property! I think I'd be more annoyed by the interruption than a stranger's car being near my house.