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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Driveway annoyance

213 replies

Newjourney2894 · 18/04/2022 09:16

Hi all, just wanted some advice on whether I was being unreasonable or not about my new home which I have waited several months to move into! 😅

My DH and I have just bought a gorgeous semi detached on a lovely quiet street which has long drive way and 2 x grass patches between each houses. Our house was vacant for about a year until we moved in and as a favour to the previous owners next door would park on the drive now and again.

The previous owners cut one of the patches of grass away to widen the drive so you can fit 2 cars next to each other but still left 1 patch of grass between the attaching houses attached.

Now it is the house not attached that would occasionally park on the drive until we moved in that I have the slight issue with. They use the middle part of the drive which is the original part of the drive to reverse their cars off the drive so they don’t have to ask the other one to come out and move the car.

They’ve kept their patches of the grass intact which is up to them but that doesn’t mean they should keep using my drive to reverse out. AIBU to start parking one of my cars further back so they can’t get out or go and speak to them? Or let it go which is what DH thinks 😂

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
ture · 05/05/2022 08:04

Zonder · 05/05/2022 07:47

@Everyoneishappier Did you miss the bit where every time the neighbour drives on OPs drive or wheels his bin down the drive it sets off their doorbell and gets the dog barking?

One simple conversation could solve all this.

I think a conversation is the way to go.

WeAreTheHeroes · 05/05/2022 08:08

@Mummyoflittledragon - good ideas. You can buy poles for mesh fencing which would be cheaper and easier to put in than concrete poles. Backed up with planting the neighbour won't be able to drive across.

LakieLady · 05/05/2022 08:21

Newjourney2894 · 18/04/2022 12:01

I think the other slightly annoying thing about it is that it sets my doorbell off every time because even though I’ve tailored the motion to not cover their house or the house on the other side them driving over the line sets my doorbell motion off

That is a very good reason to ask them to stop doing it, or to park your cars to stop them doing it.

Hard to know which option is least likely to damage neighbour relations though.

saleorbouy · 05/05/2022 08:53

I think you are best to communicate with all involved. Make sure you understand your legal position, it's best to be accommodating but they also need to understand your position.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 05/05/2022 08:58

But if they are not damaging your grass or blocking you in, I really don't understand what your issue is?

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 05/05/2022 08:59

Sorry just saw update. I didn't know 'motion' doorbells were so sensitive they'd be set off by a bin!?

elbea · 05/05/2022 09:00

How long have they been doing it for already? Although it takes twenty years, they could gain a prescriptive easement over your property if you don’t tell them to stop.

CurbsideProphet · 05/05/2022 09:16

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 05/05/2022 08:59

Sorry just saw update. I didn't know 'motion' doorbells were so sensitive they'd be set off by a bin!?

Motion cameras and doorbells are set off by motion - ie people walking or driving up /down the drive. Unless the bin is putting itself out someone is pushing it down the OP's driveway and setting off the camera.

CurbsideProphet · 05/05/2022 09:20

If you're planning to spend money on redoing your driveway you will need to find a solution first, ie a hedge or big planters, as they could damage the drive with an oil leak/ towing a trailer etc.

I can't imagine just using my neighbour's driveway without saying anything because I just assume I can keep the same arrangement I had with previous owners. Surely you would go round and explain you've had this arrangement but you understand it might not still stand?

Choccylab2022 · 05/05/2022 20:47

Still setting off the doorbell.. couple of the times it’s been the car and the other day it was then stood right in the middle of our drive chatting to the neighbour on the other side so the doorbell buzzed for 5 mins 😫

Carlycat · 06/05/2022 02:07

Definitely erect a fence. As new buyers of the house it's not unreasonable to start changing things to your own requirements. I think you're making a big deal of the situation. Just get it fenced / hedged off. Simple

BirdWatch · 06/05/2022 06:40

We bought reflective driveway marker sticks when we had a similar issue. Similar to these. We spoke to the main guy renting it (he had roommates who were the ones who were cutting across the corner to squeeze in) and showed him the damaged lawn corner, and he was apologetic and put some sod down.

Driveway annoyance
BirdWatch · 06/05/2022 06:42

A fence would be best if you can afford it though.

EnjoyingTheSilence · 06/05/2022 07:55

I would be beyond kissed off with the neighbours using your front garden as a meeting point to chat. A hedge or raised flower beds rather than fence so it’s nice to look at.

WeAreTheHeroes · 06/05/2022 08:07

I love those markers @BirdWatch - simple but effective and spaced so you cannot get a vehicle through.

custardbear · 06/05/2022 08:21

We had a rental house like this for 6 months whilst renovating our home. I occasionally did what your neighbour is doing to you and I always felt really guilty doing it (I had to because my husbands car was regularly breaking down as the battery was crappy) so I don't think it's really what neighbours should do as it's not their property - have a word with them, or strategically park

jackstini · 06/05/2022 08:22

I would probably fence off the back of drive 1 blue and make my private garden bigger yellow

Then park on drives 1 and 2 for easy access on and off for you both

Driveway annoyance
MajorCarolDanvers · 06/05/2022 08:31

Is it causing you harm or inconvenience for them to reverse across your drive.

If yes then YANBU

If no then be a decent neighbour and let them do it.

WeAreTheHeroes · 07/05/2022 08:03

Pretty clear if you've read the thread that it is inconveniencing the OP. Surely a decent neighbour doesn't cut across someone else's drive just because they can?

Ikeptgoing · 07/05/2022 14:52

I'd want to put heavy pots down the side with little shrubs or small topiary fits in, where they drive over your driveway or a barrier of some kind. It'll make it safer for your DCs when playing by side of your house

It's cheeky af that they are driving over your driveway to save themselves moving their own cars around, after you've already asked them not to. Its your property. And It's hardly difficult for them, is it to move their one or their cars to let the other one out? Most of the nation manage this!

It gives me the rage in your behalf. What did you decide to do in the end @Newjourney2894 ?

Choccylab2022 · 07/05/2022 15:10

@Ikeptgoing I have decided on paying for a three brick height wall running along the side of the drive. They were stood on my drive this morning talking to the neighbour on the other side.. another lengthy doorbell recording as they were stood smack bang in the middle of my drive talking to my neighbour on the other side

I was upstairs putting clothes away and starting the day since it was 5 past 8 when this was going on and I daren’t open my own curtains in case they think I was watching them chatting away whilst on my drive. 😭

The other neighbour on the other stood talking to them but he remained on his boundary the whole time

Maybebabyno2 · 07/05/2022 15:11

A takeaway driver parked on my neighbours drive the other day to deliver a meal to my house. When I saw them the next day I apologised. They laughed and said 'don't be silly'. This is the sort of relationship I appreciate with a neighbour. I wouldn't make an issue out of it.

daimbarsatemydogsbone · 07/05/2022 15:14

EnjoyingTheSilence · 06/05/2022 07:55

I would be beyond kissed off with the neighbours using your front garden as a meeting point to chat. A hedge or raised flower beds rather than fence so it’s nice to look at.

Kissed off? What new hellish euphemism is this? Or was the hell that is autocorrect?

Zonder · 07/05/2022 15:18

@Choccylab2022 have you told them that whatever they do on your land is recorded on your doorbell? Surely that would be an easy place to start?

Choccylab2022 · 07/05/2022 15:26

I mean there is a big sign on the window which says that CCTV/motion detection is in place so I didn’t think I’d have too. The thing is that I don’t understand how they can think it is okay… I am younger than them but I know politeness and it’s just mind boggling.

I always tell the children not to even step over the line as I tell them that is not our house if they do and they quickly step back over the line 😪

Its making me feel really sad as I’m new to the street so I don’t want to act like I’m causing trouble and I’m disturbing the peace but I also just can’t live this because what next does it evolve into parking or a fight to use the space 😫

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