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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want a lay in on the school holidays

53 replies

Highflow · 18/04/2022 06:57

2 children, age 10 & 8. They haven’t slept in once over the holidays, never do in any other holiday.
Once school is back I’ll have trouble waking them up at 7:30, but over the holiday they are up anywhere between 5:30-6:30. WHY!!!! I’m so bloody tired.
DH says I do too much with them, we have days out every day. He said they need time to chill out. Is he right? Is that why they’re waking up so early?

OP posts:
ssd · 18/04/2022 06:58

Why are you taking them out every day Confused

CheshireDing · 18/04/2022 06:59

I sympathise, I too have an 8,10 and a 6 year old, they’re always up earlier ffs

Some days we do loads, others chill out days so I have no idea why they’re up with the birds

Solidarity though

DockOTheBay · 18/04/2022 06:59

At that age can't they just go downstairs, get a bowl of cereal and watch TV so you can have a lie in?

BlueBeeSpots · 18/04/2022 07:02

I feel you OP! I usually wake up at 6:30 for the school run & work. Over the holidays I stopped my alarm as I was off work. My 1 year old woke up around 6:10 every day 😂 I was also looking forward to a lie in!

Dishwashersaurous · 18/04/2022 07:02

Most children do wake up the same time each day, including holidays.

But once they are of school age they can get up and watch TV , draw, play lego quietly while the adult sleeps.

For children of 8 and 10 there is absolutely no need whatsoever for an adult to get up with them.

Beees · 18/04/2022 07:02

Your DH is correct they really don't need to go out and do stuff every single day, that's unsustainable and sounds exhausting for all involved.

I have to say though that given their ages why are you getting up with them? Surely they are capable of getting themselves some cereal and watching TV independently.

Whyarewehardofthinking · 18/04/2022 07:04

A day out every day is ridiculous; how are they relaxing over the holidays if you are taking them out every day? They are off school for a break!

They are old enough to be some what self sufficient and certainly old enough to entertain themselves.

Dishwashersaurous · 18/04/2022 07:04

Also are you doing full big days out every day, eg out the house for ten hours. Not necessary.

Or are you just out every day eg playground in the morning, craft and chill in the afternoon. Normal

PinkGreen · 18/04/2022 07:06

Can you ask them not to disturb you until a set time? And if they wake before that time could they do something? Is there something you would be happy for them to do in their rooms? Play a game, watch a movie, play on a games console? My ds plays on his Nintendo switch if he wakes early though he was around 10 or 11 when he started doing this. I felt the same as you about my ds waking early.

Greydogs123 · 18/04/2022 07:07

Agree with pp, why do you have to get up? They’re old enough to go down and watch tv quietly and have a bowl of cereal if they’re hungry. Leave them to it and have your lie in.

Dishwashersaurous · 18/04/2022 07:08

And actually if you are really exhausted then in the afternoon you could all watch a film, and you can doze and nap.

RenegadeKeeblerElf · 18/04/2022 07:14

I agree with other posters, why does them waking early mean you have to get up? My kids have been getting themselves up and sorting their own breakfast from far younger than 10 and 8! Surely they can grab a bowl of cereal or some toast and sit themselves in front of the TV for a few hours while you have a lie in.

OfstedOffred · 18/04/2022 07:14

At 8 & 10 you don't need to get up with them until a decent hour.

They can play together, amuse themselves etc.

Tbh at 10 I'd be expecting the 10 year old to be bring me a cup of tea in bed Grin. My nephew brings us all one in the morning when we visit!

audweb · 18/04/2022 07:16

Why are you getting up with them? My nine year old might wake early but I don’t, at least not all the time. They are old enough to amuse themselves for a while, that’s the joy of having older kids!

OfstedOffred · 18/04/2022 07:16

Also consider their diet etc. If they are genuinely sleeping until 7.30 in term time, is that based on the same bedtime, diet etc?

If they are eating a lot of junk during the holidays it can make them wake early due to hunger.

Dishwashersaurous · 18/04/2022 07:18

And actually they are old enough that you can have a proper nap in the afternoon.

If they are noisy when they get up then first time put back to bed and explain that they can only get up if they don't disturb you

cleocleo24 · 18/04/2022 07:19

My dcs are similar age. They go downstairs alone and get breakfast and watch tv whist I have a lie in.

Original poster
Highflow · 18/04/2022 07:19

I don’t get up with them as soon as they wake, but I hear them getting up, the creaky stairs as they go down them. I’m a light sleeper. Once I’m awake I lay here seething about how difficult it is to wake them term time, or stressing about other stuff I’ve got going on.
It’s not a full on day out every day, just a couple of those in the week off. The rest is just meeting friends in the woods, out on the bikes etc. Have to get out each day or kids tear strips off each other.
Yes, I have been known to rest my eyes watching a film in the afternoon, but as soon as the kids spot it they are disappointed I’m not enjoying it with them. Mum guilt

OP posts:
SlashBeef · 18/04/2022 07:21

Why do you need to get up with them?? Confused my nearly 7 and 9 year olds will get a bowl of cereal and watch tv or something if they're up really early!

noworklifebalance · 18/04/2022 07:23

@DockOTheBay

At that age can't they just go downstairs, get a bowl of cereal and watch TV so you can have a lie in?
Absolutely this
WindyKnickers · 18/04/2022 07:24

If I didn't take my DS out every day he would be flinging himself off the furniture with all the pent up energy. We go to the park, local woods, wildlife parks, national trust type gardens, bike rides or I drop him at a sporty based holiday club. If I try and make him chill he ends up in the garden repeatedly kicking balls against next doors fences or running up and down the stairs, jumping off his cabin bed etc. He will play on the switch for a maximum of about half an hour before he is bored. Same with lego, crafts etc. He is 6. He goes to bed at 8 and gets up around 6.30 and does not stop moving in between. Luckily I don't live with his dad so I get some respite for a couple of days a week when he is there and that's when I can finally sit down for a few hours.

Dishwashersaurous · 18/04/2022 07:24

OK. So this is about you being stressed and a light sleeper rather than the children actually getting up.

Is there anything you can do to help improve your sleep and stress levels?

NeededAction · 18/04/2022 07:27

I think they’re just excited to start the day?! It’s not as easy for them to wake up during term time because school (however awesome) is their “9-5.” It sounds like they get to do some fun things during the hols:)

Can you try and reframe it in your head? That they’re not up deliberately to annoy you, but that they’re excited to be up and at it!

Echoing earlier suggestions - teach them to make a cuppa!!

OnceuponaRainbow18 · 18/04/2022 07:28

@SlashBeef

As OP said above she isn’t getting up with them but is a light sleeper so she hears them then can’t go back to sleep. Happens to me all the time as well.

So weird another thread about a 3 year old everyone saying it’s absolutely fine to go out everyday all day and this one is saying it isn’t.

noworklifebalance · 18/04/2022 07:30

I don’t get up with them as soon as they wake, but I hear them getting up, the creaky stairs as they go down them. I’m a light sleeper. Once I’m awake I lay here seething about how difficult it is to wake them term time, or stressing about other stuff I’ve got going on

Can you put some white noise on in your room so you are not disturbed?
Or say the earliest they can leave their room is 7am?
Sorry to say that your last post smacks of martyrdom - “ mum guilt”. What do you feel guilty for?
If there really is no alternative and you must take them out every day and you can’t fall asleep during a film, then just need to go to bed earlier. Something’s got to give if you are so tired.