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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

If you don't fear (or struggle with) sickness bugs, how do you feel about/deal with them?

121 replies

707smile · 07/04/2022 22:35

Hi,

I have very severe Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (contamination and other obsessions) and vomit phobia. I'm constantly terrified of contracting stomach bugs to the extent that I'm agoraphobic and unable to do the vast majority normal activities. I particularly struggle with eating as I'm terrified of catching Norovirus (which is often caught from someone handling your food with the infection) or bacterial food poisoning.

If you don't have Emetophobia or any particular anxiety around stomach bugs- how do you feel about and deal with bugs?

Thanks!

OP posts:
707smile · 09/04/2022 10:48

Thanks @Notjustanymum , that's great that that mantra helps. I do know a lot about food hygiene but take it to absolute extremes rather than just following reasonable precautions!

@SilverHairedCat, that must be pretty awful, even if you're not Emetophobic. One of my family members has really dreadful vomitty migraines and has said that the actual puking is a relief after feeling like your head is going to explode for hours!

OP posts:
707smile · 09/04/2022 10:50

@MerryMarigold

I really don't like being sick or feeling sick myself but not so bad if it's other people. In terms of germs I just think there are so many risks in life that I take everyday without even thinking about it, plus all the much worse things that could happen to me (car crash, heart attack, lightning strike!) that I'd rather not dwell on any of them and enjoy each day as I have it. I notice the small, nice details around me, and put things around me which bring me joy like plants, pictures, pets!
Thanks @MerryMarigold , that's really helpful. I miss out on so much of life and really want to be able to start shifting my focus onto other things.
OP posts:
Ringmaster27 · 09/04/2022 10:54

Also I’m one of those people who, while I don’t enjoy vomiting (no does do they?!), I know I’ll feel better.
Like if I’ve been on a heavy night out, and I’m passed the point of tipsy, I won’t even attempt to get in bed without being sick because I’d rather spend a minute or two vomiting than get in bed and have that horrible nauseous room spinning feeling. Blush

SpaceChocolatel · 09/04/2022 11:05

As per pps, I don't really think about it at all. Obviously make sure food is stored and prepared properly etc, but I don't consciously think about sickness. If it happens it happens and will pass. Had a bug at the weekend courtesy of DC, and whilst it wasn't pleasant, I want that bad. And bonus of a couple of days in bed whilst DP did most of the childcare and housework Grin.

SpaceChocolatel · 09/04/2022 11:06
  • wasn't
707smile · 09/04/2022 11:11

@Changechangychange

How many stomach bugs have you actually had? I haven’t had one in about ten years (and that was diarrhoea not vomiting), and DS5 has literally never had one. So obviously it isn’t something that bothers me much, because it isn’t really a frequent issue.

I also don’t have a particular problem with vomiting. Obviously I’d rather not, but if it was a choice between a stomach bug and something affecting my mobility, like breaking my leg, I’d go with a stomach bug every time. Stomach bugs are annoying and make it hard to get stuff done/tie you to the house, but they are usually over in 24hrs. I’d find a broken leg far more frustrating and for a far longer period of time.

I remember having loads in childhood/teens. I've been living a life constrained by contamination OCD for years so I don't know how often I would get them if I was living a normal life. The last time I caught a bug was when I was 19 but every time anyone in my house (or in the past in flatshares) was/has been sick I would leave immediately and stay away for at least a week so it's possible I would have caught several in the last decade. I would rather have a broken leg honestly but realise that's probably irrational!
OP posts:
707smile · 09/04/2022 11:42

@ThankyouwithacapitalR

I have health anxiety which has come about since my mother's death and a few other factors. I panic to the point of diarreah if i think my husband or daughter say they feel unwell or start vomiting. I have been prescribed propanalol for the anxiety and i keep buccastem close by if i feel very nauseated. I have to talk myself into taking my daughter so softplay or going to similar places. I also use hand gel regularly and moderate what i eat when at restaurants.

Personally, feeling sick is worse than being sick, and once it's started i just get on with it and its fine although i like being left alone to get on with it.

I hope you manage to get some useful help and are able to overcome such a debilitating phobia xx

That must be awful @ThankyouwithacapitalR , are you having therapy too? I'm having CBT just now for this. Do you find the Propanolol helpful? I can't take it/beta blockers because I'm asthmatic so the GP wouldn't prescribe it/them and I find that Benzos (e.g. diazepam) just cause an increase in anxiety when they wear off (and obviously they're addictive).

I use lots of hand sanitizer too (a foam with benzalkonium chloride as gels work for Covid but not Norovirus) but never really feel 'safe', which sounds similar to you.

I have some Domperidone and Buccastem in the house but always worry that they won't work. Have you ever taken Buccastem when you have had a stomach bug?

OP posts:
707smile · 09/04/2022 11:43

@ApocalypseNowt

Honestly I just have random thoughts like "I really should chew my food better" 😬
Haha, how do some people just have random thoughts or even find it funny being sick and then other people find it traumatic!
OP posts:
707smile · 09/04/2022 11:49

@HedgehogToes, I'm so sorry you have to struggle with OCD too! I'm sorry for your DS too (my Emetophobia started at a very young age too)- do you encourage him to share food anyway? That's probably what most CBT therapist would suggest and might help it to become a passing phase rather than a full-blown phobia.

OP posts:
Branleuse · 09/04/2022 11:55

I feel about tummy bugs the way i feel about other illnesses. I take steps to avoid them. If someones ill i wont meet up with them. I dont limit my life more than that though. I bloody hate getting sick bugs but it doesnt terrify me to the extent i wouldnt go out. I have 3 kids and its been years since any of us had one. I think the last time i was sick was from having too much whisky at NYE.

chipshopElvis · 09/04/2022 11:55

I don't worry about it because the last one I had was about 10 years ago and if I do catch one, I will feel poorly for a few days and then be ok. I had hyperemesis in two pregnancies, that was horrendous, sickness bug not so bad.

pepsirolla · 09/04/2022 12:08

Very rarely sick apart from when I got salmonella from swans I was caring for, I was a vet nurse, that was terrible. Never vomited so much in my life, couldn't keep even a teaspoon of water down. Ended up in hospital in isolation on a drip for nearly a week. However, my take on it is that vomiting though unpleasant is a good thing, it's a natural process its your body protecting you by removing viruses, bad bacteria, too much alcohol! etc from your body. Like dogs, cats etc do

Disgruntledpelicanlady · 09/04/2022 12:27

I have Ocd and used to have debilitating emetophobia (lead to EDNOS and lots of physical issues due to food restrictions).
What helped me was understanding projection. The way my OCD works is when I'm feeling overwhelmed about something I can't control I focus the attention on something I can take 'practical' steps to manage e.g. through handwashing, food restrictions, cleaning etc.
I wouldn't say my emetophobia is cured - ill always be a bit more nervy around vomit and illness than others but I genuinely don't think about it every day anymore.
I'm also a primary teacher so I think a degree of exposure has helped!

StrawberrySanta · 09/04/2022 13:22

It never crosses my mind. Our house had norovirus a couple of years ago after DS got it from nursery but we were over it in 24 hours. My DH has a phobia of being sick though. If me or DC is ever sick or feeling sick while he's at work I can't tell him because he will convince himself he's going to be sick and come home. He's done it before, come home spent the day in bed, there's nothing wrong with him! He just works himself up worrying that he's going to be sick that it makes him feel that way. It's easier not to tell him

Caneloalvarez · 21/11/2022 10:47

I know this is an old thread but how’s everyone doing on here? A mum on the school run was asking every parent whether they’d had sickness and diarrhoea last week and then I just felt awful dropping my DD off, I feel like I’ve let her down by sending her go into this germy place! I have anxiety and ocd and emetophobia and I’d been doing fairly well at rationalising these fears recently but I’m in a bit of a panic today that we will all be sick soon :(

Marigoldandivy · 21/11/2022 10:54

I never think about them and can’t remember the last time I had sickness/vomiting. I’m sorry you worry so much about this.

Caneloalvarez · 21/11/2022 11:01

@Marigoldandivy thank you for your reply! I really appreciate the rational calm replies as for so long I thought everyone was as terrified as me, they were just better at hiding it! I know reassurance isn’t good for ocd but at the same time when i re-read the more “indifferent” replies to this thread I realise that how I think is quite unnecessary and irrational. Thank you xx

Flamingogirl08 · 21/11/2022 11:25

I don't even think about it. I actually don't think I've ever had a stomach bug well not since childhood. Only time I've vomited was with morning sickness really

Sistanotcista · 21/11/2022 11:28

caulkheaded · 07/04/2022 22:37

Genuine indifference. I rationalise that sometimes I get get unwell, that’s normal, move on.

This. Plus, slight optimism that a side effect might be some weight loss.

LadyMarmaladeAtkins · 21/11/2022 15:37

We have a large steel bowl that is easy to get to which is the sick bowl, just as my parents did, might be the same one! If you need to be on the toilet as well, then the bath is okay to be sick into although it can be tricky to clear out afterwards. Or a washing up bowl. Try to keep the sink free for washing your hands. In fact, anything that can be cleaned with very hot soapy water is fine to be used in an emergency to avoid making a worse mess. Bleach is not strictly necessary although you can use that on some surfaces if you want to.

I had to sacrifice an old towel to cleaning up a huge pile of sick on the floor once, double bagged it and took it out in the morning. But it was fine. We try not to get it on the bedding or the carpet if possible as any of the hard floors are easier to clean, but carpet shampoo and then later, Febreeze, should sort it. No need to boil wash the linens, most of which wouldn't tolerate 90 degree washing anyway. 40 degrees with a prewash or extended wash and a decent amount of laundry detergent is fine. 60 if you think the bedding will tolerate it and 60 for any towels that were involved. Use biological powder if you can tolerate it, and that laundry sanitiser if you want to, but neither is necessary.

I have long hair so I always have bands to hand to tie it back, there are little dishes of them all over the place in my house not specifically for sick incidents! Agree with rehydration salts, sipping these, and then plenty of fluids and very plain food for a day when you are ready, and then build up.

A friend has carpet tiles in her children's bedrooms, you can just lift these up and rinse them down. You could even get some of that sawdust they use in schools if you want, to have to hand.

I am not that prone to being sick but a medical condition was making me more prone to food not agreeing with me last year, hence the above. Plus have had sicky children over the years. Car sickness is a different topic again!

MintJulia · 21/11/2022 15:46

We seldom get them because I cook from scratch and am very careful.

I had salmonella poisoning on holiday in Yorkshire and spent two days in hospital on a drip about 30 years ago. I felt too ill to care about anything really.

Ds had gastric flu when he was 8 and was being ill so fast we ran out of pjs and t shirts. But I love ds and just dealt with it. Being a single mum, no-one was going to pop round and do it for me.😀

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