To expect a grown man to wake himself up!

[MomOfCritters]

Bit light hearted really, but seriously is this too much to ask? My partner can never wake up on his own without me waking him up and it drives me insane, he had to go into the office today (normally wfh) so needed to be awake at 6am, but no I had wake him 3 times before he actually woke up! Wouldn't mind but I didn't need to be up at 6am DC were still fast asleep! Why oh why can he not wake up on his own!

Being charitable he’s sleeping through because he knows you’ll wake him up.

Nope.

Do you have a local Pipe and Drum band you could invite round to yours, @MomOfCritters??

Why the fuck are you waking him, just let him be late.

Will he wither into nothing if you don’t make him food too? Will he walk around with a shitty arsehole if you don’t wipe it for him?

Stop making it your problem!!

He needs to buy an extra loud alarm clock and he needs to put it over the opposite side of the room so he has to get up to turn it off. He's an adult, he needs to get his own arse out of bed.

Why should he when he’s got you to do it for him? 🙄

@BoredZelda

I can sleep through an alarm. Even if I set a couple of them, I can sleep through them. I never used to, but for some reason some times they don’t wake me up. If I need to be up and I have slept through my alarm, my husband wakes me. I’m not sure what else I’m supposed to do.

Have you seen a doctor? I know it sounds ridiculous, but if it's new, it's worth getting checked it.

Blimey it won't be long before you are laying out his work clothes and bringing him his coffee, getting his breakfast ready awww back to the 1950's you go.
I have to wake my 12 year old no way would I wake a grown ass person.

@BoredZelda

I can sleep through an alarm. Even if I set a couple of them, I can sleep through them. I never used to, but for some reason some times they don’t wake me up. If I need to be up and I have slept through my alarm, my husband wakes me. I’m not sure what else I’m supposed to do.

What if a husband or wife wasn't available ? My Fitbit buzzes an alarm on my wrist.

You aren’t his mother. Let him get himself up, and suffer any consequences.

Stop doing it then, he will soon learn for himself

Your accommodating his childishness

You're enabling him OP. Just let him get on with it.

Have you posted previously as there was a thread recently with the same issue

@LizzieMacQueen

Get him to buy a wearable alarm.

When I eventually go to sleep, I sleep like the Dead. I'm straight into deep sleep, none of this dilly-dallying around in light slumber first.

Fitbit vibrates when I'm allegedly the most wakeable.

Daylight clock comes on round the same time.

Alarm goes off on the daylight clock.

Phone alarm goes off.

Phone alarm goes off.

Phone alarm goes off.

Phone alarm goes off.

DP puts his hand on my shoulder, I sort of wake up. If I'm lucky, I actually wake up, rather than mumble at him with eyes open but brain still not operating.

The loud alarms at the other side of the room did nothing when I had them. Curtains open so that I'd be woken by the sunlight - ha - I just wouldn't be able to sleep for a further 4 hours, making it even more likely I'd sleep through the alarms.

Perhaps if I were constitutionally capable of going to sleep in the first place, it wouldn't be so bad, but my best nights are about 5 hours, usually nearer 4, frequently 90 minutes and every few weeks or so, it's a full on no sleep at all, followed by about 1 hour, then waking up again until around 5.45am. Rinse and repeat. Exercise in the evening, I'm so wired that I'm awake until just before the alarms go off. Exercise early evening, I just about get my maximum 5 hours.

Add in I'm now losing sound from Tinnitus, so even less likely to hear anything and I'm screwed.

My friend's husband takes time off work every time she comes to visit overnight because she won't be there to wake him up. I find it completely bonkers and would've probably smothered him in his sleep ... but hey ho.

An extra loud alarm clock would wake DC up so I would be up anyway, it not normally an issue as I wake up at 6.30 naturally anyway and wake him at 7 when I'm heading downstairs, I don't want to leave him as I don't want him to get into trouble at work because that would impact us as a family, also leaving him to be late would impact me because when he gets up he gives dc their breakfast while I go upstairs and get myself ready for the day. Before we met and when we were dating he used to spend an extortionate amount of money on taxis because he has always slept through his alarms so it's always been a thing for him.

Have you seen a doctor? I know it sounds ridiculous, but if it's new, it's worth getting checked it.

I have had my hearing checked and there is no issue. I’m just a very sound sleeper. It really isn’t a problem as it doesn’t happen all the time and now I’m WFH, I always wake naturally by about 8. Or, if my daughter comes in and just says my name, I’m awake immediately. My mum is the same and can sleep through anything.

What if a husband or wife wasn't available ?
Then that person would need to find another solution.

My Fitbit buzzes an alarm on my wrist.

That doesn’t wake me either.

Sympathies! My DH is the same. Before me he lived 10 minutes from the office and regularly woke up when he needed to be there. These days he's mostly WFH but we live 30 -50 minutes from the office depending on traffic so I make sure I get up even if I don't need to when he has to go in. It's really annoying but not annoying enough to make me wish he'd lose his job.

Aren't there apps where it uses someone's voice? It might wake him better than a sound.

He can wake up on his own. But he knows your their to keep him right so grabs the little extra sleep he can.

Do you think though @BoredZelda knowing you have a partner who wakes you up subconsciously makes you more comfortable and more likely to sleep through your alarm? You clearly can be woken up as your daughter wakes you up, so subconsciously your body is chosing to sleep through the alarms

Because definitely since I lived with DP I am more likely to sleep through my alarm, because he will wake me up so I am less stressed about sleeping through (mostly by telling me to turn the fucking alarm off ).

I also think phones and alexas are very gentle alarms, sometimes a proper old fashioned clock is the best option

My DP is the same, the only person his alarm wakes up is me at 6am it goes on and on for at least thirty minutes before I just shout at him and turn over in a strop.

There was a thread a few months back just like this. OP said she set six alarms and was worried as he'd already had a warning for being late. I can't remember the outcome but her enabling and excuses wound a lot of posters up!

i think you will find, that some wives or partners will actually do this for their menfolk, without much ado.. so they won't be documenting it on here. !

Do you think though @BoredZelda knowing you have a partner who wakes you up subconsciously makes you more comfortable and more likely to sleep through your alarm? You clearly can be woken up as your daughter wakes you up, so subconsciously your body is chosing to sleep through the alarms

I don’t think so. My subconscious is on alert for my daughter because she is my daughter.

I’ve been known to sleep through my alarm when my husband is away. Surely my subconscious would be at work then too? I did sleep through my smoke alarms going off once when I was younger. Thankfully it was only my flatmate burning toast at 3am.

Once in a while I'll wake DH up, if I know he hasn't been sleeping fantastically etc but certainly not an every day occurence and the favour is always returned