Freecycle rudeness

[Skelligsfeathers]

Is it just me?
I offered some stuff on there yesterday and some of the responses I have had have been so rude!
Forget please and thank you!

One consisted of the word 'available?' And that was it. Several just said ' when can i pick up? '

Wtf?
Surely if you want someone to give you something for free, you ask politely using please and thank you?
Aibu to give to people who ask nicely? And not first come first served?

You’re not wrong, but I gave something away on Facebook Marketplace recently, I got over 100 messages, and I became sadly inured to the lack of manners but was angered by people just not turning up when they said they would.

Trying to keep up with that many people was exhausting.

You can choose whoever you want to give it to

I suppose often the view is that they're doing you a favour taking the unwanted stuff off your hands, so why try to be polite or try to persuade when you can just ask for a time it can be collected.

Also probably a bunch of people on such sites who are addicted to freebies or take to sell on and because they message so much just keep it blunt and to the point

@Indicatrice

You’re not wrong, but I gave something away on Facebook Marketplace recently, I got over 100 messages, and I became sadly inured to the lack of manners but was angered by people just not turning up when they said they would.

Trying to keep up with that many people was exhausting.

Agreed.

Depending on the item, often easier to leave it out on the street with a piece of paper saying free to good home. It will be gone quickly with zero hassle!

But that is not the spirit of the site. It is meant to be something you use yourself, not sell on.

Yes we usually do leave things outside but this was a working big TV that I didn’t want to get ruined in the rain.

The plus side is the guy who eventually arrived to collect it (on time!) was very happy.

@Skelligsfeathers

But that is not the spirit of the site. It is meant to be something you use yourself, not sell on.

And how would you ever know thats not the case with whoever you give it to? People are very good at pulling the sob stories for their own benefit. Sorry I'm such a cynic.

"Is this available?" is one of the standard canned messges if you message about a sale item on Fb. It doesn't mean they're rude, only that they've clicked on the option available rather than delete it and use a tailored message.

But just 'available?'
Not even a sentence!

Maybe i am old fashioned, it just seems incredibly rude to me

OP, I use a local Facebook group to get rid of stuff and I absolutely look at who said "hello" and was polite in the message.

I put things up saying collection only they ask me to deliver I say no and go to the next person I do get people being nasty to me but no im not doing a round trip fifty miles away to drop it at your inlaws you live around the corner and they are your bloody inlaws 🤣

I’ve given up on it now, too many no-shows when I’ve waited in.

I actually think pp is right and they probably think they are doing you a favour by taking it! Cheeky but what can you do, just ignore those ones.

Not those sites but I put some free food on olio, I had a takeaway delivered and they sent the wrong order I was refunded for it so I listed it instantly, and had a man arrange to come and collect it who just never showed up, no message to cancel nothing. I would never bother again, it was the best thing on there in my area as all the other stuff listed was mouldy carrots and potatoes.

I sell on Facebook quite a lot and I'm forever moaning about manners. I generally ignore the rude ones.
If I'm buying, it takes seconds to add a please onto the pre-loaded responses.

I frequently give away stuff on Ollio and the manners of some folk on there is staggering

"ill pick up tommorow"
"i want this"
"can i have it"

I've started to respond to ones that don't use please and thank you with "whats the magic word?"

They don't usually bother replying further.

People are absolute twats on Freecyle and Facebook Marketplace. So much rudeness. Also loads of entitlement. My mum offered some very decent furniture for free on Facebook and someone had a go at her because she couldn't actually deliver their free furniture to their doorstep for them.

Slightly different, but still rude; I tried to sell 2 stair gates for £5. Buyer asked me my postcode and then if I would to deliver as she didn’t have transport. I said no she’d have to collect. She had a right go at me saying it wasn’t that far and how lazy I was refusing to drive to hers!
In the end I gave them away to a friend.
I gave away a plastic playhouse and the collector complained about the quality of the item! It’s an outdoor playhouse that’s been well used by 2 children over 10yrs and it’s FREE!

Pardon the interruption but might your desirable goods still be to hand, prithee? Or hath they found a worthy home betimes?" said nobody, ever, on Freecycle or FB Marketplace. So I'd not trouble yourself too much with the abruptness of some of the requests.

I suppose often the view is that they're doing you a favour taking the unwanted stuff off your hands, so why try to be polite or try to persuade when you can just ask for a time it can be collected.

Yes, I've concluded this as well. They have the line of 'keeping out of landfill' but that is not because it's useless rubbish that unfortunately now needs to go to landfill, but rather because it is good, useful stuff that you personally no longer have a need for.

They are benefiting just as much as you, otherwise they wouldn't bother collecting it from you. Your bin men wouldn't dream of emptying your bins for fun and giggles and to find the valuable treasures if they weren't paid to do so!

I tend to find that rudeness like this goes hand in hand with a clear inability to see things from anybody else's perspective. Because they wouldn't dream of giving something decent away free, just to do a stranger in the community a good turn, they assume that you're probably lying when you claim that it works properly and are just trying to scam somebody into taking your broken/hidden-damaged rubbish away under false pretences - which is probably exactly what they would do.

All you can do is to prioritise the polite ones. Contrary to what a lot of people think, you are under no obligation to give it to the very first responder.

I wonder how many of the rude people realise how much stuff their rudeness might be costing them, when their "Mine - coming for it tomorrow" is ignored in favour of the "Hi, is this still available, please? If so, I could collect it tomorrow, if that works for you?" that comes in an hour later.

It's not even just a case of not wanting to reward rudeness: in general, the polite people are far more likely to actually turn up and collect the stuff, as they've taken the time to treat you like an actual human offering something that they genuinely want, rather than a faceless commodity to exploit before taking their time to decide if they really can sell on do want all of the items that they demand as soon as they are posted.

I will not use such things because so many people can be rude. I stopped selling stuff on ebay because people would dispute in an attempt to get a refund and keep the goods. I just give to charity instead.

Pardon the interruption but might your desirable goods still be to hand, prithee? Or hath they found a worthy home betimes?" said nobody, ever, on Freecycle or FB Marketplace. So I'd not trouble yourself too much with the abruptness of some of the requests.

Nobody is expecting OTT forelock-tugging as everybody knows that it's something probably (although not always) of relatively low value that you want out of your house as much as they might want it in theirs; but just a word or two of greeting and basic human courtesy doesn't go amiss.

The stuff i am giving away is all actually newish stuff. Unwanted gifts given to my now grown up children.

Join your local buy nothing group on Facebook. The ethos is very much about being polite and building community spirit, as well as keeping stuff out of landfill.

@TheMarmaladeYears

Pardon the interruption but might your desirable goods still be to hand, prithee? Or hath they found a worthy home betimes?" said nobody, ever, on Freecycle or FB Marketplace. So I'd not trouble yourself too much with the abruptness of some of the requests.

Just please would do

I give a lot of kids stuff away for free and I’m surprised at the amount of people who don’t collect when they say they will and never let me know and don’t say thank you.