To be annoyed my manager hasn't checked in on me?

[Beenylou]

I took 13 months off from work after having my first baby due to a combination of maternity leave and annual leave.

I've been back at work a week now and I'm surprised and a little annoyed that my manager hasn't checked in on me at all. He's just told me to ease myself back into work and that was it.

AIBU to be annoyed by this? I think I'm more annoyed because a manager on another team put time aside to have a chat to see how I am and to also let me know that she was available if I needed someone to talk to.

What have your experiences been like post maternity leave?

Your concern OP is valid. I hope it's not a symptom of a misogynist or just a useless overpromoted manager.

People apparently don't expect common courtesy.
You've had 13 months away, having a baby is a huge life event, coming back to work can be bloody hard for a new parent especially a mother if they've been the main parent (which most are!)

He could've checked on how you were and if you felt ok. A quick check would do initially but it would be good practice to have a good work meeting a few weeks in too!

I'm in two minds. A good manager would have spent some time to bring you up to speed on what you've missed and ask polite questions.

Did someone else fill your role whilst you were away? I think that may have an impact on how they've reacted. They could have had to pick up the slack or alternatively, just lost a temp they valued. Not an excuse, but may explain the ambivalence.

I'd check in, if only to check if there were any access issues, any changes in the time away, any reminders of processes and how to do things, and just to see if you're settling back in okay.

I'm shocked reading some of these replies. Some of you sound like you have terrible people mangers to report to, and I'm saddened that it's acceptable.

I had a member of staff on furlough for a month back in May 2020, and I checked in with her on her first day back, brought her up to speed, made sure she was ok later in the week then agreed with her how frequently she wanted catch-ups (as remote working was new at that point!). That's after a month! It's the minimum I'd offer to someone returning after an extended absence.

Of course he should have! And all the people commenting all have terrible managers too.

It's the absolute basic minimum I'd expect from a manager

He should have had a plan for your return to work, including a coffee catch-up or meeting.

Having said that, you could show proactivity and put time in his diary yourself. You shouldn’t have to but it’s better that than to just leave it.