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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

was wedding guest a CF?

63 replies

UnsureCF · 03/04/2022 15:08

I was at a wedding venue yesterday. Wedding breakfast had finished, very very behind schedule, we were being ushered out so the room could be set up for the evening event.

There was loads of wine leftover from the lunch, many bottles unopened. I spoke to father of bride and advised that the wines were taken from the room and popped in the ante room for the day guests and evening guests to continue enjoying.

(At my wedding a few years ago, the different hotel cleared the unfinished wine in similar circumstances and it was never seen again, despite being fully paid for. I can only assume the bottles were put back into stock and sold again 😲)

I was chatting to another guest who'd just arrived for the evening party and explaining the situation and she grabbed an unopened bottle of rosé and said that'd be good for when she and partner return to hotel room later that night.

AIBU to think this was not acceptable? That wine was for all the wedding guests, not for someone to squirrel away for drinking later alone?

(BTW, the FOB didn't get the wine moved across and when I spoke to him at the end of evening, he'd got no idea whether venue had any plans to pass it on to the happy couple. Haven't spoken to anyone about it today)

OP posts:
VladmirsPoutine · 03/04/2022 16:21

I don't think the guest taking a bottle would have annoyed me but that the venue didn't proactively move the wine or ask what should happen to the wine would annoy me. If they're hoping on people's joyous ignorance in such circumstances they must make a pretty good margin of re-stocking 'sold' bottles.

Memyselfandfood · 03/04/2022 16:22

Yes cf, you are not a busybody Hmm

UnsureCF · 03/04/2022 16:23

@Eggshausted

You bothered approaching the brides father about this during the reception? It would probably be the least of his concerns that a few bottles of wine may go missing, YABVVU to even speaking to him about this. Why try and spoil his total enjoyment of the day by telling tales on others? None of your business.
We were just standing chatting anyway. So I said "remember what happened at my wedding FOB? Probably best to get the wine shifted across to the other room"

Was very low key

OP posts:
Chikapu · 03/04/2022 16:23

You seem way over invested in the booze at someone else's wedding. I doubt many people would give a fig about it.

Katyrosebug · 03/04/2022 16:25

I know it's not the same, but at my wedding once the cake had been cut and taken away, it came back having been sliced but most of it never appeared, I found out later that the bottom tier hadn't even been cut and had been left out back, never offered it or advised. I was really miffed

Tulipomania · 03/04/2022 16:26

I agree with you OP. It is very bad manners.

UnsuitableHat · 03/04/2022 16:27

Bit cheeky yeah, but no biggie

Grumpasaurusrex · 03/04/2022 16:28

Wouldn't bother me to see someone do that to be honest.

Blimecory · 03/04/2022 16:34

I think that’s very poor of the guest. I’d be shocked, to be honest.

WalkingOnTheCracks · 03/04/2022 16:35

My raisin detre

All the time? Or just currantly?

Tenohfour · 03/04/2022 16:36

Yeah they are cheeky, but it's not really any of your business what happens to the wine at someone else's wedding.

Suzi888 · 03/04/2022 16:42

I wouldn’t personally, it’s cheeky but wouldn’t be that bothered.

Mummyoflittledragon · 03/04/2022 16:49

Yes it’s rude. We had this at our wedding. The wife of dh’s distant cousin came without her dh so she took a bottle of champagne home for him. These people are cf - not just because of this. Lots of people we used to hang out with were cf. I could go on.

Nothingfree · 03/04/2022 16:51

This happened at my wedding my DM spotted my DH cousins wife sticking red and white wine in the boot of her car which we would have been refunded for if unopened, she is a CF in life who denies being so. If I had known at the time I would have told her to put it back.

unname · 03/04/2022 16:53

Yes, super rude.

My husband furnished nice cigars for our wedding. A family asked if her husband could take a few. We never saw the cigars or the humidor again. We laugh about it but will watch her more closely in the future.

unname · 03/04/2022 16:53

*family member

Pipsquiggle · 03/04/2022 16:53

You said there were 'loads of bottles left' so no harm no foul.

Kite22 · 03/04/2022 16:57

The guest was being a bit cheeky, but you do seem over invested in this.
Seems an odd thing to be helicoptering over, when it wasn't your wedding, your money, and you don't even drink the stuff so it wasn't like you were being cheated out of your share Confused

Spaghag · 03/04/2022 17:00

I'm not sure that it matters where the wine was consumed. It was taken by a wedding guest wasn't it? I assume if she had opened the bottle there & then you wouldn't have minded?

UnsureCF · 03/04/2022 17:01

@WalkingOnTheCracks

My raisin detre

All the time? Or just currantly?

Grape repartee Grin
OP posts:
rwalker · 03/04/2022 17:02

Most venues just charge for the wine any used gets put back on the bar resold and no refund .

BobHadBitchTits · 03/04/2022 17:04

I twice worked for a wedding catering company.

The workers stole so much alcohol it was obscene.

Gonnagetgoing · 03/04/2022 17:06

It’s one bottle of wine not like she grabbed a case! What with the cost of attending weddings these days I don’t blame her.

burnoutbabe · 03/04/2022 17:08

well if the Father of the bride was maybe the OPs father too, then of course you'd be alerting them to being potentially ripped off by a wedding venue (as in taking all the unopened drinks and not refunding them)

girlmom21 · 03/04/2022 17:09

Was the wedding really that boring that you had to start 3 different conversations about bottles of wine?

Sounds like the guest did the family a favour as it would've disappeared if she didn't make us of the wine!