To have cried in asda

[Littlemissdan]

Is it just me that the whole cost of living thing is getting too much for? I actually had a (very small and no one watching!) cry in asda when I saw some reduced bakery goods because I didn’t know if I could afford them alongside my entire smartprice shop. £30 I had for a 2 week shop including nappies, and it just broke me that I actually had to wonder if I could afford a 55p treat for my kids. I can’t believe we’re living like this, 3 years ago we were comfortable and now I’m relying on the free school meals half term vouchers.
Not really looking for advice or budgeting advice here, just a bit of solidarity really :(

SucculentChalice Errr, can you point to where I claimed to own property in a city centre? Because I don’t

But straw men aside, it’s not the case in every city in the UK that a small flat near the centre costs more than a bigger house in the suburbs. Sometimes people choose the bigger house in the suburbs not because it’s more affordable, but because they prefer the space, even if they are sacrificing the advantage of not needing an expensive commute. I was just pointing this out. I wasn’t “berating” anyone.

Yes you need a TV licence for sky and virgin.

Rather than take advice that might land anyone in legal hot water, it's worth checking.

You must be covered by a TV Licence to download or watch BBC programmes on BBC iPlayer – live, catch up or on demand. This applies to any device and provider you use.

Don’t forget, your TV Licence also covers you to watch or record programmes on any channel as they are being shown on TV or live on an online TV service.

www.tvlicensing.co.uk/check-if-you-need-one/topics/bbc-iplayer-and-the-tv-licence

@Rainydaysandmondays24 SEN top trumps the distance and transport rules

@Interviewdisaster

SucculentChalice Errr, can you point to where I claimed to own property in a city centre? Because I don’t

But straw men aside, it’s not the case in every city in the UK that a small flat near the centre costs more than a bigger house in the suburbs. Sometimes people choose the bigger house in the suburbs not because it’s more affordable, but because they prefer the space, even if they are sacrificing the advantage of not needing an expensive commute. I was just pointing this out. I wasn’t “berating” anyone.

You just get worse. You think other people should live in a small flat in a city centre just so they can convenience you with their taxes then?

And now you're referring to me as "some people". Utterly charming.

Some people like me with their damn taxes and jobs, eh? The likes of us.

The point is, again, that this country is particularly badly run and particularly unfair. The infrastructure is poor, the planning old fashioned, the public transport dreadful and the local authorities are poor performers. Tax for employees is high, when you take into account the fact that employees are not allowed to deduct their commuting to work expenses from their personal income tax bill. I'm going to keep repeating that last point because its clearly not sinking in.

More expensive and difficult to commute to work here, not even tax deductible for employees.

OP, I am so sorry that you find yourself in this spot, about 10 years ago that was me. I had been made redundant and it took me five years to find a new f/t job. I lost my house, so I really do understand.

However, at the time the thing that kept me going was my sister who would appear at my house once a week with a bag full of supermarket basics and a treat - custard tarts and real coffee. So what I am suggesting if any of you know someone who is going through tough times then just buy them a bag of basics plus a treat, my mum would always say, an ounce of practicality is better than a pound of pity. If you think you or they will be embarrassed, then leave it on their doorstep, ring the doorbell and run.

I am lucky enough to be working f/t now and pay it forward by adding to the local food bank... because I do not know if I will ever need ti.

@Bloomingblooms2022

I feel you , my 3 year old has had tonsillitis and now a lower chest infection. He’s been on antibiotics now for 7 days but finally got his appetite back and eating everything in the kitchen. Went to do grocery shop today and terrified now I had spent what I had left on food to try to make sure he keeps eating I don’t have any money left to take him to Dr or hospital if he gets unwell again. 3rd time he’s had tonsillitis and chest infection this year, feel bad that I can’t keep heating on and that might be causing it.

Being cold won’t cause tonsillitis...it’s an infection .....I’m thinking you not in the U.K. if you have to pay for the doctor? that must be hard ....are there any ways to access free healthcare?

WTF are you talking about? I have a job. I pay taxes too People can live where the fuck they like, it’s no skin off my nose.

Are you the only person ever to live in the suburbs and commute into a city? I was answering the question of who lives close enough to city centre workplaces. I answered that people who live in city centres do. Other people make different choices.

I’m sorry. This exchange is detracting from the helpful advice that OP was receiving, so I’m off.

@Interviewdisaster

WTF are you talking about? I have a job. I pay taxes too People can live where the fuck they like, it’s no skin off my nose.

Are you the only person ever to live in the suburbs and commute into a city? I was answering the question of who lives close enough to city centre workplaces. I answered that people who live in city centres do. Other people make different choices.

I’m sorry. This exchange is detracting from the helpful advice that OP was receiving, so I’m off.

Point out to me where I suggested that you didn't.

I pointed out that for most people, living right next to their work is impossible. Its not a point of making "different choices". Its a point of living in the real world and dealing with the circumstances that everyone has to face.

The general point is that this country is continually screwed by shit governments acting for themselves and their pals who make a lot of money out of putting high costs onto ordinary people.

True

Have had to hide my tears a few times reading through this thread. I am so sorry people are dealing with this. We were very poor growing up. I do my best now as a mum of 2 but as everyone says, the cost of literally everything just keeps increasing.

On the off chance this helps anyone I will pass on my latest tip. I discovered that I had some Tesco Clubcard vouchers and was able to use them to buy 6 months worth of free delivery. This was much cheaper than cash as the vouchers go further.

I’m now able to do my scrimping and saving online and can count every last penny. Walking round a real shop doing this gave me huge anxiety.

Xx

@CheesecakeAddict I'm just imagining the electric bike comment said in Boris's voice and I think you've just discovered his secret MN account

When times are hard ( and most of us have been there ) if you have bought fresh veg for dinners , wash and keep the peelings , boil in water with a Oxo cube if you have one. Blitz or mash and use as a soup for the following day.

@Hawkins001

Will everyone that wants to save £ be cancelling their Netflix, sky tv packages ect I know the internet is an essential for most, but tv is a luxury.

We cancelled all ours a few years ago when I had to give up work due to a progressive medical condition. We share a mobile phone that costs £6 per month. My husband is well past retirement age and although he has a private pension as well as the state one, we are on a fixed income. My only income is PIP which I'm terrified will be taken away at each assessment despite my health deteriorating. Our income is just a few pounds above the threshold for help and what little is left of our life savings will cover our funerals and a second hand car if I lose my pip. I cannot get to my various medical appointments without a 15 minute walk to the bus stop and at least 2 busses which I cannot manage. My husband worked for 45 years and me for 35 years to now be frightened about how we're going to manage if prices keep rising. I cannot begin to imagine how young people with children are going to cope over the next few years.

@SucculentChalice. You are right because an awful lot of inner city property is either tiny flats that are poorly suited to families or really big high end stuff that’s wildy expensive ( London in particular but also areas like Didsbury in Manchester, Clifton and Redland in Bristol ) etc — I do agree though that living in the arse end of nowhere whilst it has advantages is hugely impractical long term for many families too and makes stuff like 2 cars a necessity rather than a ‘nice to have— also restricts job choices too - lots of people gave done this to save cash as can now WFH— I do think this will bite people on the arse if they lose those jobs and can’t find another comparable Fully WFH job quickly.

Predictably these threads attract some who come on to advise those struggling that they wouldn't be, if only they managed poverty better 🙄 It's offensive, tone-deaf and completely ignores the bigger issues which causes the poverty in the first place. I don't believe for one second that anyone truly thinks cancelling Netflix would have any notable impact on peoples finances when we are facing unprecedented increases in energy costs, soaring fuel/food prices and NI hikes - you really think Netflix is the problem? Like fuck you do - but it puts the onus of responsibility back on the individual doesn't it? Your government will be very proud of your gaslighting. Some of these replies are very much of the 'tell me you don't give a fuck without saying you don't give a fuck' ilk - disgusting really, considering the emotion in the OP.

If you struggle to offer any advice, other than 'buy an electric bike' (seriously, wtf?) maybe click off the thread, you don't have to comment if your level of empathy is on par with the Moggs and Allsopp's of this world.

@Sugarplumfairy65
I understand your perspectives, I'll admit I should of worded my comment better than I did.
All the best in these times, it would be a miracle if everyone below a certain amount got a raise to help ofset the costs with inflation.

@Londoncallingme

Get an electric bike for work?

How on Earth is she supposed to afford to buy one when she can’t even afford petrol? Some people on here don’t have a clue 🙄

@lemmein

Predictably these threads attract some who come on to advise those struggling that they wouldn't be, if only they managed poverty better 🙄 It's offensive, tone-deaf and completely ignores the bigger issues which causes the poverty in the first place. I don't believe for one second that anyone truly thinks cancelling Netflix would have any notable impact on peoples finances when we are facing unprecedented increases in energy costs, soaring fuel/food prices and NI hikes - you really think Netflix is the problem? Like fuck you do - but it puts the onus of responsibility back on the individual doesn't it? Your government will be very proud of your gaslighting. Some of these replies are very much of the 'tell me you don't give a fuck without saying you don't give a fuck' ilk - disgusting really, considering the emotion in the OP.

If you struggle to offer any advice, other than 'buy an electric bike' (seriously, wtf?) maybe click off the thread, you don't have to comment if your level of empathy is on par with the Moggs and Allsopp's of this world.

I understand your perspectives, and I'll admit I could of worded my perspectives better than I did. And yes for society can the government improve and do more ? And on an individual level, can people do more ? I also understand some people already do all they can, but we as individuals cannot always point to the government when the government is limited via resources ect on what it can do for the people, and if people suggest e.g. Tax x companies then from a business perspectives they just shift their registered company offshore, ect.

@DownstairsMixUp

Op it sounds awful. Regarding the telly license it's definitely worth not having it. It's a complete waste of money and they can't do anything. I haven't it in years and never. I've had knocks and it's a simple "who is it?" "We are from the tv licensing" "no thanks, bye" and close the door. I've had one since I had a ring doorbell so it's even easier now. It's not much but another £100+ off your annual bill is something.

And the cost at the moment for the full sky package is 75+ each month,

It's really tough.
Have you tried giving up meat for a while? Others have said about lentils. Also
Butter beans and chick peas and kidney beans are filling and healthy.
If you have a slow cooker there are lots of good recipes for casserole with frozen veg and beans or pulses and chopped tomatoes and stick. They are filling and nutritious. And if there's any leftovers you can use it as a jacket potato filling.
Good luck

@PebbleMillAtOne

Use the scanner they have in store and it adds up tour shopping as you go along. My swear by buy is Frozen veg, never get fresh.

Yes I agree, we go to farm foods and stock up on frozen food. Frozen corn on the cob from tesco is great. Dc love them. The price of food shopping is shocking. I am really going to have to start being more careful as well. I find writing meal plan/list helps to keep costs down.

@Hawkins001. But that’s what the government want you to think— it’s like saying if we tax Amazon fairly they will leave the country— no they won’t— it’s one of their most profitable markets— they do tax efficiency here- because they can. certain countries it’s a condition of business that if you do physical business sakes (whether on line or not) in ‘that ‘ country , those sales are taxed within that country, nitcehete registered address is — I believe the USA works that way and I think Sweden and Denmark do , as do others.

One thing that people fail to mention over and over and having done a spell at CAB is debt— the reason quite a few people have such poor budgets isn’t always income , it can be that large amounts are covering off debt— if you really are struggling but partly because you are paying off hundreds a month in debt payments — it’s better to try and negotiate payments down or sort an IVA rather than try and keep up payments as they are and be cold or hungry . Another thing is I was shocked at the amount of women shouldering all these worries themselves with partners and husbands who worked and certainly were not fully contributing or hiding income- this isn’t aimed at the oP- it’s a general comment. Make sure you know fully the household income and know it to be the case