Alcohol Free Forever?

[SavBbunny]

I have been supported by a wonderful group of people on an alcohol free MN thread to stop drinking. However I loved my wine and the thought of never having a glass again makes me sad. I now feel guilty even discussing it.
Has anyone been able to moderate their drinking after being a binge boozer? All the quit lit, online forums, AA say you can't.

I was sober for about 10 years after falling into alcohol dependency after the death of my partner. I can drink in moderation now, but my life is such that I don't have either the desire or capacity to drink much (young family, work, etc)

@Kimcheese

I am mid 50s so missed the ladette thing. Was doing a national sales job with so much driving. No licence, no job. I moved to a rural village and fell into wine time mummyhood. These friends reminded me of my youth. Big fun (big boozers). TBH I was lonely and bored. Should have gone back to the smoke.
But hey we all make mistakes.

@hihellohihello I agree that it's changing but I'm still surrounded by people who think it's not a night out without boozing and bragging about boozing is prevalent - but thinking about it, they are probably products of that 90s binge/ladette period.

I think it's the same with food. So many meals in pubs are pretty much nearly all of calorie needs for the day or more. I end up with much less choice or trying to order off menu. I'd just be happy with an option of a smaller portion.

Equally some places will not sell a small glass of wine. Many soft drinks are far too sweet to my tastes so I can have water or a limited choice of de-alcoholised drinks (some good some dreadful). I'm getting to know which brands of them I like because I think that be useful with regards to social situations.

And yes, moderation still seems to offend the most people. Polarising people is just far easier!

I did dry January with the intention of giving up 100%. I rarely drunk before but if I did it always ended with blackouts and terrible hangovers. I had no off switch like you. After January my mentality about alcohol changed and I realised its not my friend. Now if I go out I'm very cautious about drinking and only have 2/3 drinks which is way less than before. I had some good sober evenings in January which showed me I don't need to drink to enjoy myself. The only reason I have a couple now is really the social pressure.

I am picking on this thread as I have reached 100 days af. I no longer have the desire to down bottles of wine but don't wish to spend my life without raising a glass for special occasions.
I have lost a friend on my journey as she couldn't go without a drink in my company. Another time i went to a meeting where someone was smashed at 10.15 am. An eye-opener.
I have great willpower and don't want to let my family down by losing control.
Any tips welcomed.

I use the Dry App to set random goals of 100 or 50 days. Then pick a date to have an event, a dinner or a party and plan to drink a number of units.

I’ve done this for three years now and it seems to stop the creeping back up to a bottle and a half every weekend.

I like feeling well enough to get up at 7am at the weekend and go for a run.

I did also like the sitting drinking and chatting thing too and I do miss that, it’s only as I’ve got older I realise I can’t do both.

Health benefits have triumphed for me. I was also a smoker at one point too though and I confess I still feel ‘jealous’ of the friends I have who still smoke and drink in their fifties with seemingly no repercussions.

@Elsielouise13

The event thing is a good idea. I don't want to start drinking at home again. I enjoy my af gin. I also like Nosecco.
My friends birthday is next month and i want to be present.