To get some money towards Sons Glasses

[ellebelli]

My Son is 15, He has recently finished with his Girlfriend, there was some issue with her friends not being keen on him and wanting her to end it, I think there was a lot of jealousy on both sides.
They all go to the same school.
On Tuesday Son came home from School upset that his X GF Friends had pinched his glasses off him and ran into the Girls Toilets.
They told him they had bent the frames and put them in the Sani bin, Son did not go and try to get them back( said he couldn't go into the Girls Loos, nor did he tell a Teacher)
My Partner( who tends to deal with all the School stuff) Emailed his Head of Year to let her know what had happened.
We heard nothing back-So later in the Afternoon on Weds he Emailed again but directly to the Head this time, She did reply and asked which Toilet block it was...We have heard nothing since..
I know it will take awhile to speak to the Girls involved etc.
If we could get the Glasses back, even if the frames are damaged could still use the lenses and just get new frames..
Meanwhile my Son is struggling in lessons without his Glasses.
No one has spoken to him about it.
Are we really going to have to buy new glasses for him?? He has only had the damn things for a few weeks!!!!!
What would other parents do in this situation?

Be glad that your son is rid of that horrible little bully.

I'd demand a meeting with her parents. To be honest I'd have probably already gone to their house by now to tell them what she had done.

Go to specsavers.
My teenagers glasses are from specsavers. She does get the voucher.

Her last glasses were £220. Like I said.

We've never needed spare ones as she has never lost or broken any in the nine years she's had glasses. Of course nobody has taken them at school and bent them and put them in a bin,

In your conversation with the Head, point out that glasses are a disability aid and that it is impacting his ability to learn.

They may well have CCTV showing the students going in, though it's unlikely to show the glasses and definitely won't be inside the toilets. That's why they want to know the location. Unfortunately they may not be able to do much and can't compell parents to pay, but I would make a big fuss if it was me.

I would be absolutely making a stink. Glasses are expensive and the girls parents should be footing the bill....

@WhiteCatmas Ds2 has been wearing glasses for 11 years, he is now 16. We have been to every optician from high street names to independent ones. Both my sons have a particular style that they like. Ds1 likes moulded plastic, Ds2 likes metal frames. As Ds2 wears them all the time it is part of how he sees himself. He is sadly limited to what he likes, sometimes we end up in 3 different shops (huge branches not small ones) trying to find ones that fit arm length wise, or the size of the frame that doesn't dominate his face or too wide. Also colours of frames without a flash of contrasting colour either inside or outside etc. He is particular.

We always start at the free ones and try to find something in there but usually have to work our way through the more expensive ones. Vision Express also top up the voucher to a higher level. His prescription means he needs lens thinning which is at least £55 per pair. We just let him have what he wants as we are able to afford it. But thank you for the link. It may help others.

Luckily now he is over 16 so next time we can buy his frames online.

I hope it will be dealt with to your satisfaction.
I would have contacted the school promptly.
Those nasty girls will probably deny it happened. There are more of them - his word against theirs.
They need a good fright from the authorities- be it school or police.

I can’t believe that at least 3 people have said he shouldn’t wear them after they’ve been in a sanitary bin.
Way to teach your child that periods are dirty and shameful.
Just bloody wash them! (if not otherwise damaged)

Given that bins can be emptied at any time, I don’t understand why you didn’t phone them school as soon as you knew!

Thanks for all your help and advice
When we went to choose the glasses a few weeks ago my son liked none of the free pairs, he knew what style he wanted and so we paid more for these even with the money off voucher.
I'm just happy son wanted to wear them without fuss or embarrassment(I hated my glasses and wear contacts now)
He doesn't need them all the time but started to wear them between lessons which is when the girls grabbed them.
He thought they would be in them back so didn't make a fuss or tell anyone...though he says you should not tell anyway! (teenagers what can you do!!!)
Son has adhd and sometimes I don't think he realises the severity of situations...?
Both myself and dad were working late that evening and it was around six when we got told..hence the email that night with the hope it would be responded to in the morning.
By lunchtime we had heard nothing so dad did ring and the receptionist said the head of year would get back to him...nothing!
This is when we emailed and copied in the head teacher who did reply straight away to ask where the incident took place.
She emailed this morning to say the matter is now being dealt with by a different member of staff because his head of year is not in school now.
It's the HOY I'm pissed with.
She failed to reply to either email and didn't ring us back.

Yes in hindsight we should have rang the school that evening.

Hindsight is a great thing!

This was bullying and straight up vandalism.

I certainly would not want to wear glasses which had been in contact with someone else’s blood. Blood is a contaminant.

There are many different bloodborne pathogens, including malaria, syphilis, and brucellosis, and most notably Hepatitis B (HBV), Hepatitis C (HCV) and the Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV).

transmission of HIV, hepatitis B or C can occur across any mucous membrane - which includes the eye.

Who would want to risk that?

Are you meeting the HT today @ellebelli ?

@resuwen

Both of mine wear glasses. With anti-scratch, anti-glare and thinned lenses they cost a fortune.

This!

Non-glasses wearers often dont comprehend the cost.

The free/cheap frames come with standard thickness lenses, for me that's about 1cm thick.

This is crap for several reasons

• it limits your choice of frames, can't have metal frames with lenses that thick just the thick plastic moulded lenses
• peripheral vision is affected, you can see the edges of the lenses
• people are horrible, children are tactless and thick lenses mean teasing

Opticians charge a lot for thinning lenses, about £70 for each level of increased thinning, often to get them the thinnest they can be which is what I need if I want metal frames you need to add £200 to the cost of the frames.

Has he told you the names of the girls that took them? Make sure they are passed over too. It sounds like he may not want to.

No meeting because she sent a email this morning saying it was being dealt with today and she would get in touch later...though we will ring by the end if the day.
Yes I know the names of the three girls involved and which on actually damaged the glasses
One of the girls has been in my house several times! Though I'm only in touch with his ex girlfriends mum and it was not her that did it so I have not contacted parents etc...though that may be the next step!

Consider getting him contact lenses as schools can take an ice age to tackle bullying. Especially if it is bullying by girls on a boy...they seem to take it less seriously due to sexism.

I agree on the lenses issue. My DC are very shortsighted and a “standard lense” never fit in the free frames so we had to pay for thinning and so on. And that £70 is per lense per degree of thinning, and eyeglasses have 2 lenses...so it’s £140 per degree of thinning per pair eyeglasses. We also needed the anti-refraction lenses due to astigmatism. NHS “free glasses” only cover the barely off perfect vision prescriptions. If your child is moderate to severe prescription, it is very costly.

Absolutely horrible thing to happen to your child.

"She emailed this morning to say the matter is now being dealt with by a different member of staff because his head of year is not in school now.
It's the HOY I'm pissed with.
She failed to reply to either email and didn't ring us back."

Sounds like HOY might be off sick.

Hey OP how horrible for your son to experience. I hope you've managed to have a resolution from the school and from the girl who broke the glasses.

@Lou1siana

Invoice the school. There isn’t anything that he could have said or done that would justify stealing someone’s glasses.

The girl's parents need to be billed, not the school, she is responsible for their loss.

Any update op?

Do you have home contents insurance, OP? My parents were previously able to claim for replacement glasses when I got mine broken in a stupid incident at school (considerably less malicious than this and at least partly my fault). The excess on their policy was a lot less than the cost of the glasses.

I don't think you can pissed off with the HoY if they aren't in school, but I do hope the Head, it having reached their ears, will make sure it is dealt with

In your conversation with the Head, point out that glasses are a disability aid and that it is impacting his ability to learn.

Is needing glasses a disability?

Any cctv in the area where they were taken?

I'm sorry this has happened op. No advice but just sympathy here from me. I think its a very strange and bullying thing for the girls to have done aswell really awful :(