Someone stole my DS's school trousers at school

[thenewduchessoflapland]

AIBU to believe that some another child has stolen my DS's school trousers?

I don't think it's accidental.DS is in a mainstream school and year eight.He has additional needs.The catchment area covers area's where there's alot of poverty.

DS has a pair of age 12-13 trousers from M&S.I brought them for the fit and quality as DS is skinny and has ripped cheaper trousers at the knees.They have an adjustable waistband which was set on a high setting to accommodate his skinny waist.

He's come home in a pair of really worn age 14-15 years Asda trousers.I think the child these belong too is wearing a pair of hand me down trousers which are too big for them;they definitely would have noticed my DS's trousers were much smaller when putting them on if it was accidental.

The trousers were hung on his peg with the rest of his stuff.DS unfortunately is an easy target due to his additional needs.He has in the past had his PE bag stolen (empty thankfully) and his PE sweater.They were labelled inside and not in long property.

Thé PE changing rooms are the only place his LSA isn't allowed to be with him as she's female.

As the M&S trousers are his only pair at the moment and these other ones are too big I now have no school trousers to send him in tomorrow.

I've decided if this other child is so desperate for a pair of decent trousers then they can have them but I hate the fact that my DS is having things pinched and other children are taking advantage of my DS's vulnerabilities.

Or it could be a simple mistake?

@DrManhattan

Or it could be a simple mistake?

There's 2 clothes sizes difference and the adjustable waist was set tightly.There would have been a noticeable size difference

I take it your label is a bright prominent label right in the waist where nobody can miss it?
DS lost masses of uniform and PE kit, it's like a SEN tax 🙁.
Its possible if the trousers aren't obviously named the other family might not even notice.

Ds keeps getting his ties stolen. Despite school having cctv ds gets the blame for losing them.
They loaned him one found in a corridor.. It has ds's initials on the back but school are adamant it isn't his and want it back every end of school day.
School uniform issues bring out the batshittery in people..

I would assume that it was a mix up to be honest. School changing rooms are chaotic! Do his have his name clearly in?

If he struggles with the changing rooms can he change somewhere else? My Ds changes in the medical room with his 1-1 just outside the door.

Why would he only have one pair of school trousers??? I would buy cheap pairs but buy a few rather than just one M&S pair if cost is an issue. I don't think any other child would be plotting to steal your child's school trousers tbf, I just can't imagine it happening. They're probably a bit short and too tight and the other kid is wondering why and can't work it out.

It's probably a mistake, someone's knocked bits off the pegs and put them back wrong. Some kids are that oblivious they honestly wouldn't realise being in the wrong clothes.

On a side note... Why on earth does your son only have 1 pair of trousers?!

I think an accidental switch is more likely. Kids don’t really notice quality of things like school trousers. When getting dressed after PE they put things back on incorrectly and obviously uncomfortable but are oblivious. It’s not unlikely a child would put a smaller pair of trousers on and not notice. Sorry it means you’ll have to replace them though. There’s always a chance the parent of the other child returns them to school tomorrow.

Complete overreaction to something that happens dozens of times every year in every school in the land.

If they are that different in size maybe it was a mistake. If they were going to steal something they’d steal something that fitted?
Or am I naive?

Can he put his stuff in his bag and give it to his LSA to look after while he's in PE then give it him back afterwards?

Its not fair but you need to get him a couple of pairs though, what if he ripped them or spilled something on them?

That’s really horrible. School changing rooms are a real problem because they are (largely) unsupervised for obvious reasons. Stuff often “goes missing”. Since covid, my school have kids in games kit all day on their games day (each year group has one afternoon per week) and then there’s far less “getting changed” required. Much more sensible imo.

Did his support person notice he was wearing trousers much too big for him?

It could be accidental. A child in my sons class went home in shoes that were identical to his but ONE was one and half sizes too small. Complained on way home his feet hurt so mum said ok, we'll take you to Clark's at weekend.

Neither parent realised for TWO days. My friend felt so guilty but they got swapped back

My son once came home in his much taller friend's trousers. I text the other boys mum to let her know and she replied with a picture of her son wearing half mast trousers .

When the parent/guardian of the child who wore the M&S trousers home sees your child's name clearly labelled on the trousers, they will return them asap. Yes?

I would also assume this was a mistake. He tells you that he hung them on a peg but changing rooms are chaotic and gross. Stuff gets knocked off, ends up on the floor, mixed up etc.

Does his LSA wait outside the changing room and then accompany him during PE? If so, here's a suggestion.

1. He goes in, gets changed, puts his clothes in a bag, takes them out to LSA.
2. She looks after bag during PE.
3. After PE she gives him the bag of clothes, he goes and puts them on. Then his clothes are never left unattended.

Could this work? Having said that, I work in a school and children honestly don't notice when they put on stuff that's the wrong size! Especially if they are zipping off to do something else!

I hate it when the dc bring the wrong item home. My ds recently brought a cardigan home after p.e instead of his jumper

I find it a bit odd you assume it was deliberately stolen, rather than that it was a mix up.

I don't think boys that age care enough to target m&s trousers over Asda ones.

This is amazing your child has officially made the ride of passage of bringing /wearing home some random kids clothes. Honestly the amount of times my child 'swooped' coats or cardigans or decided her school shoes looked better on her friend I can't count. It's rubbish for you and costs you money but it's happens to most kids either voluntarily or involuntarily

Ds lost his trainers. They sat in his friend's PE bag for weeks. Not once did his friend wonder why he had a spare pair of trainers (in the wrong size) in his bag.
Do you have a parents page on FB? Ours is full of lost and found clothing.

It's annoying yes, but I'm sure it's an honest mistake and wasn't done intentionally. Also find it bizarre your ds has only one pair of school trousers.

There's 2 clothes sizes difference and the adjustable waist was set tightly. There would have been a noticeable size difference

I remember when my 2 dds were aged 18 months and 4yo. Dh managed to dress them in each other's clothes and didn't notice until I came home a couple of hours later.
But also my dc have managed to come home with something too big/too small even though they are normally very careful and not noticed.
I remember dd2 once came home in a much larger (boys) poloshirt. She didn't notice. Nor, to our mutual amusement as mothers, did the much larger boy who didn't notice either that it was far too small nor it had the girlie frill round the sleeves and collar. Mum had to skin him out of it and was very apologetic.

It's almost certainly an accident and there's another boy at home whose dm is saying "how on earth did you get those trousers on? They're way too small. You must get your pair back because I'm not buying you another and they had some growing room in."

The other Mum is probably equally annoyed. I doubt kids take much notice whether trousers are from M&S or Asda. They somehow got muddled up and neither child was prepared to speak up - it happens.
Lesson learned though, don't only have 1 of any item of uniform. When they send the 'lost property' message, go in and claim something, even if it's not yours and maybe go for a bigger size to have as a spare in future.

@MargaretThursday - that made me giggle.