to get obsessed with unfairness

[Ceci03]

so I'm tired of fighting for fairness. I asked my boss today if I could work 8am to 4pm (instead of 9am to 5pm), There are 6 of us in the team and 3 people already work 8-4, by request. I said I would only leave at 4 if there was someone in who is working til 5pm - i.e. I would be flexible and asked to just do it if there is someone there. I am often left on my own from 4pm to 5pm if I'm on the rota with the people who are working 8-4. I honestly didn't think it would be a problem. We have the use of a free car park for a few months - leftover from covid, - and I've been driving in, which is a lot quicker than public transport, and less chance of catching covid, but I do have to be in by 7.30am to get a space, so I've been wandering in, getting a coffee and starting work usually around 8.30, getting a headstart on the day, which is fine. Colleagues were saying to me I should just ask to leave at 4 as I'm in so early so today I bit the bullet and asked. And was immediately shut down. She referred me to my contract - from 2.5 years ago - which apparently says I have to work 9-5 (I checked it later and it doesnt mention this), she also said she has to put the 'business needs' of the team first, and I need to be there from 4-5. She said other things, like how I need to officially apply for flexible working. When I pointed out that in the policy it says that local managers have discretion for temporary arrangements, she said she had made her decision. I'm finding it really hard to let it go. Obsessing about why she is unfair. I need to just let it go and get over it, but I'm finding it really hard, especially as I get older, to let this kind of unfairness go. I need to though I know that. Life is unfair and that's life. It really bugs me that I take pride in my work, and even last week worked late when I got home, to meet a deadline, and had everythign ready to go on the Friday morning. no acknowledgement of that, or offer of time in lieu, or any mention of it at all. I know, I chose to do that, as I wanted to meet the deadline. But it's just hard when you ask for some flexibility in return, and it's immediately denied. WIsh I could switch off my brain now though.

Is it legal for you to be alone at your workplace?

you say that you work unpaid overtime in order to complete your work on time.
but you are not really completing it on time, are you, if you have to go over your contracted hours to do it.
be more organised. get in to park early if it suit you, then sit in your car, put on some calming music, go for a walk, which helps clear the mind and energise the body, is more healthy before starting work.
be more self-contained. do not gossip with others about your manager, or anyone at work.
just do your work, within your hours, and leave on time.
don't do anything, don't read any work emails, in your own time.
maybe keep a log of tasks done throughout the day.
so if she says why haven't you finished xyz, you can show what you were doing. ask if she can define priorities more clearly if necessary.
don't get het up. life's too short. good luck.

Yeah wel the thing is i sometimes have to work overtime as it is out of my control. Like
The other day I was sat in the office all day not busy and at 440pm work comes in to be done ASAP. In that instant I did what I had time for and got up and left. This did not go down well with herself who was working from home that day and had already logged off at 4pm. She had a complaint the next day from the perso who left the work in and she asked me why I had not finished it and I said I had to go home. Thing is if I was at home I would have happily kept working on it . I think that’s the only reason I’ve stayed so long in that job.

She expects me to be flexible and come in at 8am for meetings, or be availalbe for meetings on Teams, outside the 9-5 , but when I ask for just a small concession, she immediately starts quoting back to me my contractural obligations. The flexibility only goes one way. She has never offered me time off in lieu, or even acknowledged my flexibility

At this point, you should stop doing unpaid overtime or anything above and beyond as your company clearly couldn't care less about you and, like many places, as you say, the flexibility just runs one way.

Ceci03, I take back my previous posts. I think I misunderstood your follow up posts and modeled a very different situation in my head. She does sound unreasonable, inflexible and unfair.

Good luck with the interview on Tuesday.

I'd be annoyed too! She sounds petty. What a waste of your goodwill.

could you email her to say you will be willing to work beyond 5 pm for late submitted work, if she can confirm that you will get TOIL.