Can you be 'too cheap' for kids bday party gifts?

[Kab3042]

Dd has had 4 party invites from class mates between now and April. 2 are also joint parties with younger pre school or reception age siblings (Dd is year 2 if relevant). So not sure whether I need to get the sibling something too?!

Even with the classmates alone, it's 4 gifts. Potentially 6 if you get the for the siblings. Can you look too cheap?

I'm thinking nice colouring books. Aldi had some nice large colouring books for £1.99 this morning and some pencils or felt tips perhaps? So £3-4 each? Too tight? Home bargains also had colouring books for 90p.

we are struggling financially and have my older sons birthday in a few weeks then Dd's soon amongst everything else we have to pay for too.

I do £5 budget too unless it’s a particularly close friend.

One way of saving money is to buy sets of books online and then split them up for presents. So a set of 10 books would do 5 children (2 each) plus I’d add a bag of sweets to the package.

I used to use The Book People but they sadly went out of business, but I’ve recently used Books2Door who do things like 10 Books for £10: www.books2door.com/collections/10-books-for-10

We had a big party for my youngest a few weeks ago- big, because she and her classmates haven't really been able to have any parties at all because of lockdown, so it was her first. Actually, I felt really uncomfortable with how expensive some of the gifts were- with some families giving several. It was very sweet of people of course, and I wouldn't want to sound ungrateful, but the most important thing was that people came (she has some issues fitting in at school). Most of the presents are still sitting in their bags in her room.

I think sub £5 is fine. Aldi has some brilliant wee kits like rainbow labs and tie-dye kits etc around that price. I've already stocked up.

Books2Door also do sets by author so again you can buy a box set and split them up, like this Roald Dahl set 16 books for £27 www.books2door.com/collections/7-9/products/roald-dahl-collection-16-book-box-set-ages-7-9-paperback

Or 10 Sherlock Holmes books for £12 www.books2door.com/collections/7-9/products/he-sherlock-holmes-childrens-collection-shadows-secrets-and-stolen-treasure-10-books-box-set-ages-7-9-paperback-sir-arthur-conan-doyle

Colouring books, story books, or those little pocket money craft sets (make your own unicorn bracelet etc) sets they do in The Works are my go to for DCs friends birthday parties. Under a fiver.

4 x Large Special Effect Bath Bombs Pack, Magic Bath Bombs, 2 x Star, Rainbow & Moon, Children's Birthday Gift Set, Vegan Friendly and Cruelty Free www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B095K8275R/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_i_KWPJRER5Y6CJPRJCJ6HK?psc=1&tag=mumsnetforu03-21

Gelli Baff Red, 1 Bath or 6 Play Uses from Zimpli Kids, Turns water into thick, colourful goo, Educational Creative Sensory Easter Toy for Children, Certified Biodegradable Gift & Vegan Friendly www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B013WHLCDG/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_i_G57T1QF0ZS1ACRFPNGNM?psc=1&_encoding=UTF8&tag=mumsnetforu03-21

Rainbow bath bomb or Gelli Baff is about £3, plus a wee pack of sweets?

I think at these class parties you end up with hundreds of gifts and no one really remembers who got what etc, and anyway it's fine not to spend loads. They are having the party to celebrate the birthday, not for the presents.

My children are past the age of whole class parties now but I think 1 nice picture book and a packet of sweets or chocolate is a great present.
When my children had these big parties I did take some of the 30 plus gifts they recieved (duplicates or something to young for them or I knew they wouldn't use) and put them in my present stash basket to regift.

£5 ish is fine. My dd would have loved the colouring book and pen combo.

Later on when they had good friends of many years then some gifts were £10-£15 but we were also selective about who to accept invites from.

My default cheap and easy gift is a big box of Maltesers. Costs around £4-5 in the local shop but you can get them for £3-4 in the supermarket.

Never fails to please. It's something about the way the box rattles :) I also like the fact that the packaging is cardboard and I know they won't go to waste.

I never count the cost of the present the kids receive. Just happy they come to the party!! I don't spend more than £7 including card though. Most parents dread more crap having to be packed away 😉

Just get gifts for the friend. I stock up on present like stuff in the sales (rex London for example had some great stuff for very cheap- it's nice quality too!), and the works etc and then just choose something from the box when needed. So much cheaper, a few quid per present for something that is worth more.

I’ve spent around £10 for a present for a school party this weekend as I saw something I think their child will love. I’ve been worrying about having overspent. I definitely think that £3-4 per child is plenty. When we have a group of parties together I often look at Argos or somewhere 3 for £10 offers and they all get the same present costing just over £3.

I'd much rather my child receive a colouring book than a bunch of plastic crap.

I’ve found in the gifts we’ve received there’s a huge variety in how much the giver is likely to have spent. I think £5-£7 is average, some less and occasionally £12-£15.

My views on this are:

-at a large party it’s v likely gifts will get jumbled and you won’t get any credit for a fancy gift
-unless you know the child well there’s little point in spending a lot as your present may miss the mark (my DS hates superheroes for eg, that stuff goes directly to the charity shop)

• there’s no correlation between wealth of family and the generosity of the gift

-I really don’t care AT ALL how much people have spent. -‘plastic tat’ is not at all loved by parent recipients

So all in all - yes £3-£4 on a simple gift that will get used like colouring or a book is absolutely fine.

Don’t bother with buying stuff just give £5 in a card.

Most children have too much stuff and after a party you just have a house/flat with just more loads of stuff.

Giving money is better as a child could put the money towards something big or just be encouraged to save.

No gifts for siblings.
Homemade card with drawings from your DC.
Colouring book + pencils / felt tips etc even if not expensive at least it will get used, unlike plastic crap that people often give.

We just had a birthday party and the gifts we received ranged from £5 to a £20 amazon voucher. The one that I was the most impressed with was not expensive but so thoughtful: card on a theme loved by DC with hand-drawn crossword puzzle inside with words linked to this theme + keyring of DC’s favorite animal + notebook with picture of said animal. And the wrapping was very obviously done by a child which makes it even better!

I think a few pounds per present is fine. I’m very pleased with myself that I managed to find some reduced board games at £3 each. DS seems to be at multiple parties every weekend at the moment.

Pa card factory do 10 cards for £1

I feel you. Parties have gone mad this year, we had / have 15 so far this year! I spend approx £10 per child, it’s expensive!

And btw DS birthday was in October. He had so many gifts from his birthday that even now, there are about 10 gifts that are still not touched. It makes me feel a bit ill that people spent money on them. I’d much rather people just spent a couple of pound

I would definitely try to find a pound shop and see what they have.

For kids in the class but not close friends I just put £5 in the card. My kids always preferred money instead of a gift. For their closer friends we know what kind of things they like so spend more (but that's because we can afford it.)

I agree with other posters, don't buy for the siblings.

I absolutely agree that there is little correlation between parents income and presents. In fact one of my kids when to a private prep school (primary) most presents were £5 but in the state primary school where parents income varies some gifts have been way too much I feel £15-20.

As a mum I really don't care and don't judge and I am completely aware that we all have different financial pressures.

We do £8-15 depending on who it is. Always look for offers, 342 etc. Same with teacher gifts, always look for offers, otherwise it costs a fortune!

@1000yellowdaisies

I wouldn't buy for the siblings. Cheap is fine if thats all you can afford but dont be upset when your son gets a load of £3 aldi stuff back in a few weeks time. I usually spend about £15 to 20 per child for their birthday and i think thats fair given they enjoy the party, there's usually a bouncy castle or activities, food and cake :)

Read the room.

I think a few pounds is fine for class parties unless it's a very close friend who you regularly have for playdates in which case maybe 10-15.
Dd1 is now 11 and had a sleepover and trip out just with 6 friends. I was gobsmacked by the £10-£20 notes in cards & presents.
Her richest friend spent the least 😉

We do £10 for presents (reception age so lots of parties) but then there’s wrapping paper and a card too! Occasionally we do spend £15 if it’s a close friend of our DC. We’ve only bought for siblings if we’re friends of the family and so they invite our younger DC along too. They’ve invited both of ours so we buy for both of theirs.

How strange. We live in a very affluent area and yet no-one would spend that here. Are you somewhere that doesn’t share clothes around either and everyone buys new?
It’s all hand me downs, home made treats and thriftiness here. Spending money rather frowned upon as vulgar!

You still have birthday parties where you live? How terribly vulgar. Where I am we knit a balloon and pass on the fun from a pre loved party.

@Kab3042. Colouring book & pens/pencils is a lovely wee classmate present. It's plenty no need to buy for sibling or the other child if party sharing.

Definitely don't turn down an invite because you can't afford a present, kids just want their friends there! A 20p or home made card is fine too. Just come & add to the fun!!