To not enjoy holidays with babies / toddlers?

[Mountainbear]

Planning to go away in September with a one year old and three year old and my DH really wants to go abroad.

Basically, I find holidays with small children stressful. You're away from home, without all of your baby stuff, their routine is disrupted, you're dragging them around all over the place, you can't go out in the evening etc. In no way is it really relaxing.

So, how do I make it better? If you enjoy holidays with little ones, what is your secret??

I'm thinking of trying somewhere a short flight away, but which is still warm in September and has nice beaches / national parks, but also interesting places to visit - they're too young for lots of kiddy attractions, but somewhere with a nice aquarium, museum, archaeological remains, caves etc., would be good. Thinking about Mallorca and wondering whether to try one of those all inclusive resorts with a splash park, play area, kids' club etc., or whether it'll just be horrendous and we'd be better off with a villa / air bnb??

Any suggestions welcome.

Also, I do know I'm very lucky to be able to go on holiday, and I am grateful.

Be interested to see this too. All our holidays with small children have been uk based thus far.

It’s not like holidays before children so if you have that mindset you will only be disappointed. Me and my husband each get a couple of hours alone by an adult pool in our week- that’s my highlight. I also pick destinations less than a 5hr flight, lots of different pools, a soft play and a playground- and only venture out once or twice. If you can afford pick a family room with a divide so when kids are on bed you can chill on the balcony or on your patio. Evening entertainment usually starts early at family resorts so you can enjoy that.
We have Mallorca booked this year- I’m so excited! I just want sun and not to cook/ clean for a wk!

Personally when our DC were that age my preference is a villa. You can get them into a reasonable routine, feed them at times that work for them rather than having to stick with the set meal times at resorts and enjoy the outdoor space when they go to bed.

It's same shit, different pot.

At least with a UK holiday you can load up the car to the gills with everything you might need, and you can easily find a shop for everything you thought you could get away without.

You could try Mark Warner with its wall to wall childcare but even they don't have car seats for long coach transfers.

U.K. holidays to me aren’t worth it because the weather is near on always crap, as for a villa- I understand the idea of space but it’s not in anyway a holiday to have to cook and clean for me.

Yep definitely change your idea of a holiday.

Our worst holiday was a UK one when DC1 was a year old. We were all miserable because we tried to stick to our routine too rigidly. Now we relax things, bedtimes get pushed, dinner times are more fluid and we just basically do what we want to make the week enjoyable.

I also think it helps trying to get away more regularly so they get used to the idea of not being in their own beds etc but realise that’s a luxury.

The holiday village in Ibiza was ‘nice’ (aka hell on earth with no kids, but worked with kids), short flight and transfer, splash park and pools, easy food choices, decent rooms with doors that closed on the sleeping area leaving a sofa and tv and the patio accessible, lots of space for buggies/travel cots etc. it’s totally geared towards kids, I’d have a look.

We did a few holidays with DD when she was little. Not everyone's cup of tea and I'm aware of the sneery comments, but we went AI. It really depends what you want from your holiday.

We had play parks,pools,kids club,some little shops and entertainment on site. No cooking,no cleaning. We had a flat on ground floor, DD asleep and we'd sit on the porch listening to the entertainment while OH did drinks runs. We talked,played games,read etc.

During the day we were in the pool,or at the park ,or at the beach just chilling. DD had a nap mid day and then after either back to the water or go for a walk around. Back for showers,dinner then evening entertainment for her and bed.

I found them really fun and easy and relaxing, but we're not must do/see things people, every minute must be full and worthwhile people.

Honestly I don’t understand why people get so stressed going on holiday with kids. Do not go to a villa. You’ll just be cooking and cleaning like at home, that is not a holiday.

What you want is an apart-hotel so apartment room with separate bedroom (or ideally 2 bedrooms) and a living space but it’s actually an all inclusive hotel. You want a kids club that’ll take the 3 year old and also offer babysitting within kids club for 1 year old. Kids pool, one with pirate ship slides etc is perfect as they can toddle around and you can sit on the side. Beach, playground. Entertainment in evening. At that age we would eat early with kids then walk them around in double buggy, they would sleep then we would eat / have a drink with them asleep in buggy next to us.

Also divide and conquer - one looks like after both for an hour and then the other so you actually get a bit of time off to read / sunbath / relax.

And personally at that age we didn’t go on many excursions - certainly not “archaeological remains, and caves”. They are happy just playing and being with you guys. Try not to stress. Let the 3 year old chill on iPad in afternoon for a bit. Let them eat chips for dinner. We’ve been all around the world with our 3 from when first was 2 months old and you just have to chill out about routine etc

Book an all inclusive hotel near the beach. We spend the morning by the pool and the afternoon on the beach. There's so much choice in the restaurant and if your kids don't like what you pick for them go up and get them something else. They'll love the unlimited ice cream and drinks.

We don't go to the entertainment, we have dinner then go for a walk around the resort. Youngest will fall asleep in the pushchair then it's back to the room and bed. DP and I sit on the balcony with a bottle of wine and play cards.

The only stress id DP managing all the luggage at the airport while I keep two little ones in control.

I love going abroad with my DD. We always do All Inclusive, made sure to get a couple of naps in the pushchair after swimming throughout day as then we could lie by pool/sunbathe etc. Evening after dinner, put dd to sleep in pushchair ao we can watch the entertainment, then head back to room if she qoke up.

Last holiday we went with friends and did rooms next to eachother so we could put kids to bed and ait out on balcony playing cards and drinking etc.

When my DC were that age - we always tried to book ground floor apartments with 2 bedrooms, preferably with sun terrace by pool - they were good nappers so we could have a bit of peace and quiet during day and sunbathe on terrace a few feet away from them
I don’t go on holiday to cook so we would eat out every evening and just do sandwiches and snacks during the day
We would also take it in turns to look after both DC for 1/2 a day a couple of times a week to allow the other parent some total relaxation

We went away last September with my daughter, her partner and two children of 3 and 20 months. We stayed in an AI in Corfu. Weather was perfect. We spent the days by the splash pool where the boys played happily. Then down to the beach for pre dinner cocktails. After dinner there was a kids disco and then we could put them to bed and sit on the terrace with a drink. It was perfect.

I feel the same re holidays with the kids, but we still do them and always come back with happy memories. It is harder of course but as my DD get older she absolute lives going away. It's easier with her being 4, but DS is still only 1, so we have a little more hardship to come!

Having said that, we took DD to Lisbon when she was 15 months, and it was great. We went at the end of September and it was still really warm/hot. It has a lot of what you're looking for; short flight, warm weather, aquarium, short train rides to beaches, etc. It's also a super family friendly city. Everyone was so accommodating of DD. We stayed in an Airbnb in a quiet zone of Lisbon, a mere 10 min walk from downtown; and a couple of minutes walk to the train station. It was perfect!

Unless you go on a Mark Warner type holiday where childcare is provided it is the same shit different bucket with less tools and equipment available to you to survive. I wouldn’t bother.

We just got back from Disneyland Paris with our 2.5 year old and 6 month old.

We're planning Orlando towards the end of the year so the Paris trip was a bit of a test trip to see how we got on.

My biggest tips are to intend to take it at their pace and pick a really child friendly destination . But don't expect it to be a relaxing pre child holiday unless the place you're going to has a kids club you can use.

Also, definitely look into carriers. We used a double pram in Disneyland cause it's such a crazy amount of walking. But if it was a slightly less intensive holiday I'd plan for each of us to back carry 1 of the kids. That'll give you more freedom of where you can go and they're also invaluable in the immigration/passport control hall when you arrive in your destination.

Last thing I can think of... It might be a bit marmite but we took our toddler's tablet and it was invaluable for keeping him focused and helping him calm down when it all got a bit much or if we were having some downtime in the hotel.

I love going on holiday with my toddler. I've done one long haul, two short haul and two UK solo with her.

Partly, I would say I'm one of life's more laid back people so that's a natural advantage. But stuff I do that helps

• go to a supermarket and get stuff to make lunches. Then I know she's had some fruit and I'm not constantly thinking about snack time.

• I have a Phil and Ted's travel cot and a Snoozeshade so I can still have the lights on in an evening, hotel room wine on the balcony is still good wine

• Don't care much about bed time/nap time or what she eats, she loves a pool bar meal on a sun lounger (despite being quite rigid at home)

• Baby carriers are easier than prams and noone will ever convince me otherwise!

• Have a beer at lunchtime

When you say you don't have all your baby stuff, what do you mean?

We've done long trips abroad from the time dc was around 7 months old. The only difficult thing I found was taking all their stuff along. Dh and I always chose child friendly resorts/hotels, always split the childcare between us so that we both felt like it was a holiday. I think its difficult if you make it to be. Both parents need to share duties equally.

Look at TUI blue holidays. If you go Cyprus or Majorca or something where similar you will companies who you can hire baby equipment from, they will deliver it and collect it from your hotel.

But your description seems to involve a lot of dragging your kids around at an age when they will be happy with a watering can, a handful of toys, a swimming pool and a playpark.

I absolutely love our holidays with our children.

We usually pick a hotel with a waterpark and have a swim up room. That way if the children nap, you can still sunbathe and swim if you want to.
With regards routine, we don’t bother on holiday and my children have always been fine. We love seeing them enjoying themselves in the pool and on the beach. They’ve experienced so much and I love seeing them so new things. We tend to hire a car for 1 or 2 days to explore the area and then a day on a private boat to explore different beaches.

What baby stuff do you need? Hotel rooms have cots and you take your sling and or pram with you.

We always go out in the evening when away. Youngest can nap in the pram if he wants to. It’s lovely seeing them play together and having a dance around before bed. They always sleep well on holiday after their busy days.

I enjoyed my holidays when my DC were babies and toddlers. He had a pattern of one Mark Warner holiday, one Centre Parks Monday to Friday break and a week long Haven holiday each year. We didn’t have a bad holiday.
Once the youngest went to school we started to go on long haul holidays.

We're going all inclusive in Benidorm this year. We're going somewhere that has a little cottage type room with a small kitchen and separate room for the kids.

It has an on-site water and animal park as well.

I really wanted all inc because I didn't want any meal time drama. I didn't want to have to cook anything or think about what anyone was eating. I don't care if they eat chips for a week, I really don't.

AI with creche. Make sure you get a suite/apartment so you don't have to spend your evenings sitting in the dark with sleeping children.

For a holiday to be relaxing for me, I want zero cooking, lots of food options available for DC, some child-free time and plenty of fun kids activities. We do other types of holiday too - self-catering, city breaks - but those take a lot of planning and I just accept that they're going to be more stressful than staying at home (but at least a break from the monotony).

I haven't been abroad with my DC but when we holiday in this country we aren't so regimented regarding meal or bedtimes, i found if you try and stick to your normal routine it becomes a nightmare, take a step back, relax and go with the flow

I loved holidays with our kids when they were young, we took all of ours away from the age of 3 months. We always got a 2 bedroom apartment or villa (villa was best when we could afford it). It meant that we could sit out on the balcony/terrace when the children were asleep (mid afternoon or evening). Or swim if we had a villa.

We did a mixture of BBQ on the terrace in the evening, or eating out with the children. But they were always very good at sitting at the table, or in their pushchair, so even if they weren't asleep, it wasn't too stressful.