To think I'm right and the doctors are wrong?

[Rabbitpoop]

DD is 13yo and has had really bad nausea and stomach ache for 10 days. Shes been off school the whole time and very little appetite. GP thought it was appendix related so sent us to hospital. First surgeon admitted us and said seems like appendix as she only has pain in the exact area of the appendix. Put us on the list for surgery.

Saw another surgeon who said he wanted an ultrasound first. Fair enough. They couldn't see her appendix during the scan but no obvious signs of anything else wrong so surgeon passed us to paeds.

Paediatrician came in and said it is constipation before he even examined her. She isn't constipated at all and the pain is only on the bottom right side in a specific area. I questioned him and pushed back quite a lot as I'm 100% sure this is not constipation. She's had no change in her bowel movements. Paeds said there's no sign of appendicitis in her blood tests so it's unlikely to be appendicitis.

I looked up the NICE guidelines and it says that you can't rule out appendicitis by blood test or ultrasound and that it can present differently in different people. It seems the only real way of telling is laparoscopy/surgery but the surgeons won't do it as she's not writhing in pain.

I don't know what to do. I'm sure it's not constipation and that it's something to do with her appendix. They said they wouldn't give antibiotics either as there's no sign of infection.

I'm worried they're just going to tell us to go home and she'll continue to be off school, feeling sick, barely eating and with a stomach ache.

Any advice?

Why are you pushing for surgery? What if it is negative. No inflammatory markers I presume in blood.

OP I've read all your posts. I think you've had an awful time and you're being treated appallingly. Also, please don't listen to the anti surgery types. I had a grumbling appendix. But in my case, the doctors decided to remove it relatively quickly and all was fine. It's not major surgery and frankly, rather minor surgery that may well be the problem than her sitting around in pain indefinitely. I hope today is the day!

Frightening - how must this poor kid be feeling now having been refused food and water for so long; I’d be scared out of my wits if it was my DD - can you trust the hospital, will the op be ok, will withholding food and water bake it worse etc - my heart goes out to OP and her DD and I wish she’d got the support she’d needed on here 😡

@Rabbitpoop

I'm so sorry for how you've been treated. You've been clear that you're not pushing for one particular course of action but that you want clear communication and demonstration of effective management of your DD's condition.

Asking you to fast and come back for surgery, then leaving you for hours with no food / drink, only to tell you do go home! (And then reverse that) is appalling.

You must be exhausted. I hope you've got some better treatment & answers now.

And please try to ignore @Schmz deeply ignorant & offensive posts

Hang on in there OP.
If I hadn't insisted my son was admitted to hospital when he was a toddler he wouldn't be here now.
I carried him in unconscious into A and E after 10 days of being fobbed off by an inept Dr. He had sepsis and was seriously ill.

If my drunk GP, who was later suspended and struck off, had listened to me 4 years earlier I wouldn't have required 2 major open surgeries to remove a fibroid the size of a melon.

Trust your instincts, don't be derailed in ensuring your daughter is properly and thoroughly investigated.

Please keep fighting. I had this exact thing with my daughter… they didn’t think it was appendicitis. Luckily for us the surgeon wanted her seen by gynae. They decided to remove her appendix and investigate. Turns out she had a burst cyst and endometriosis. Keep going and ignore the idiots being nasty. You know your child better than anyone… mothers instinct has a lot to answer for x keep us updated xx 😘

There’s clearly a lack of understanding of appendicitis on this thread. I know of no-one who has had it that have presented clinically textbook.
3 days I was fobbed off for with mine…because I’d just had a baby and it must be gynaecological -why? Because I wasn’t being sick/had no nausea. My blood tests were also normal. When they finally took the fucking thing out it was hours away from rupture!
Appendicitis does not always follow a textbook clinical pattern.

DH went to the GP in 1994; GP sent him straight to A&E with a letter about suspected appendix. Registrar reviewed him and asked his occupation. He said Barrister and the Registrar's response was "oh as you're a lawyer, I'll send you straight up to theatre as an emergency". He arrived at 10.30, his appendix was out by 12.30. He was told he was lucky to have arrived when he did because it wasn't far off rupture. He hadn't felt nauseous, he just had a bad tummy ache. He walked to the Dr's and got the bus to A&E.

What was worse was that I arrived at the hospital at 9am because he wanted to be brought home. His discharge had been signed. The nurses said he couldn't go until he had been given his painkillers. I asked when that would be "oh by about 2pm". I then asked why I couldn't take him home and come back for them and got a cat's bum face in return.

As I packed up DH I overheard the nurses complaining at the nursing station that the man in bed x and his wife were insistent on him leaving which meant they had to change the bed and get ready to receive another patient before their shift change. Presumably some poor sod on a trolley in A&E.

I'm not pushing for surgery I just want a doctor to examine her and listen to her history and make an informed decision on what is best to do. Not decide its constipation without even physically examining her, then tell us she needs surgery, then leave us in a busy waiting room nil by mouth for 9 hours during which time we're told to go home twice by nurses, then admit her, tell me a doctor is going to come and talk to me so I wait up until midnight and no one comes, all of which time I can't leave my DD to get food or drinks, no rest and no sleep. I have been polite and patient with all staff but I am understandably frustrated, exhausted and stressed so was looking for some support here.

Thank you to those who have been compassionate.

The surgeon has at last come to see her. He said a CT scan is too risky for her age and that while the bloods dont indicate appendicitis, medicine isn't an exact science and the fact that she has a few indications of appendicitis (something called McBurneys point pain? And another test I can't remember where if they press on her left side it hurts on her right) means that it is sensible to take it out. They don't think there are any other tests or treatment options so it's either leave it or take it out. The surgeon says best to take it out as she's had same symptoms for so long and unlikely to get better if we leave it.

OP please give us an update on what happens. I was initially thinking gallstones but not sure sure would have it that young.

Hi hope your daughter is ok . Just wanted to send support and mention that my daughter had similar around the same age . Typical appendix symptons but couldnt get clear view of appendix on scan. One surgeon was ready to remove appendix and then another said to wait till morning. Overnight she developed a severe sore throat and it turned out she had tonsillitis. Apparently the glands that are in the same area were inflamed and the pain that causes is virtually identical to appendix pain. Not saying its the same for your daughter but just thought id mention as id never heard of this before and the pain was intense according to my daughter. even now she sometimes gets that intense pain and around a week later tonsils appear infected. Good luck with getting answers and hope your daughter makes a full recovery soon

What an ordeal you've had

I hope your DD gets the op today and it does the trick.

I'm really glad you have had the opportunity to talk to someone properly - it all sounds very difficult anyway and everything seems twice as bad when you haven't had food or sleep.

One of my friends had a similar issue where she was told it couldn't be appendicitis because she had had the pain for days and days but it was that when they eventually took her appendix out.

Hopefully the OP goes well and it resolves the pain - obviously you don't want your daughter to have an operation she doesn't turn out to need, but neither do you want her not to have an operation if she does have appendicitis!

Thank goodness you've got to speak to the surgeon. Good luck with the surgery & I hope you'll finally be able to eat & get some rest.

So glad you've finally seen the consultant. I think I'd be having a word with Pals about what's happened. It's a shambles. Did the consultant have anything to say about you spending the day kicking your heels in a&e?

@Rabbitpoop I'm glad she's seen a consultant and that a plan has been made (if I understand correctly) and more importantly while she's being so stoic I hope her pain isn't too terrible, I keep imagining my own 13yo DD x

@Schmz

99.9% of posts here are very supportive to the OP

A very few have pointed out another perspective

As far as I can see I’m the only one voicing the opinion that OP comes across as a nightmare to communicate with

And on the basis of that, OP threatens to flounce off …

This is what I mean -
If she doesn’t get a unanimous agreement
Which you won’t get in healthcare -
Then she’s all riled up !!

The OP’s understand histrionics are unhelpful and in my opinion will be driving health care professions to think what is going to head off a complaint as opposed to what their clinical judgement suggests …

OP flounce on that !! You DO sound a bloody nightmare !!

There have been several perspectives on this thread. But it takes a special kind of person to, blame and name call an OP who has spent 10 days worrying about her child's mystery illness.

No he just kind of brushed it off. To be fair I got the impression he seemed a bit embarrassed by it but was eager to move on and discuss what to do going forwards rather than what has happened so far. Which is fair enough. I got a good feeling from him as he actually listened and was really honest and open about not knowing for sure what is causing it but he seemed convinced surgery is the best option, so I feel happy to put my trust in him. DD liked him too as he actually spoke to her like an adult and engaged with her.

OP I think the confusion and contradictions must have driven you mad.
Please do update us. I am genuinely interested.

@Rabbitpoop

I think I'm going to step back from this thread as being told I'm a nightmare to communicate with when nobody has communicated with me at all and that I'm over anxious and that I'm not advocating enough for my child is making a bad situation worse and not helping.

I don't think you're a nightmare OP. I think you and your daughter have been treated really, really badly by several medical professionals and treated unfairly by some people on this thread.

Only leave the thread if you want to. Don't let the keyboard warrior bullies, who are in the minority, push you away.

@Rabbitpoop I saw your thread earlier, I really feel for you and your Dd and think you’ve done your very best for her. Good luck with it all today

@Rabbitpoop

I'm not pushing for surgery I just want a doctor to examine her and listen to her history and make an informed decision on what is best to do. Not decide its constipation without even physically examining her, then tell us she needs surgery, then leave us in a busy waiting room nil by mouth for 9 hours during which time we're told to go home twice by nurses, then admit her, tell me a doctor is going to come and talk to me so I wait up until midnight and no one comes, all of which time I can't leave my DD to get food or drinks, no rest and no sleep. I have been polite and patient with all staff but I am understandably frustrated, exhausted and stressed so was looking for some support here.

Thank you to those who have been compassionate.

The surgeon has at last come to see her. He said a CT scan is too risky for her age and that while the bloods dont indicate appendicitis, medicine isn't an exact science and the fact that she has a few indications of appendicitis (something called McBurneys point pain? And another test I can't remember where if they press on her left side it hurts on her right) means that it is sensible to take it out. They don't think there are any other tests or treatment options so it's either leave it or take it out. The surgeon says best to take it out as she's had same symptoms for so long and unlikely to get better if we leave it.

That all sounds extremely sensible. Good luck to you both today.

I'm glad it's working out for you & your daughter at last. What time is her surgery scheduled for? Hope it all goes well and she has a speedy recovery.

What a shambles. You are doing really well to navigate such a difficult and contrary ‘system’ under such difficult circumstances. Well done.

Unfortunately this has been our experience
of the NHS for decades.

I think they are so busy trying to save £s that millions are being wasted.

I reckon they spent more than £250,000 on me over a period off 7 years that left me in agony unable to work All to save £300 on an mri