To be annoyed by this text from my sister regarding Alton Towers?

[Chocolattay]

I have no interest in the place. I have a young baby who’d come with us

Just say no, thank you. Baby is too young to enjoy it and it's money you could be spending on something he/she would actually enjoy.

I'm guessing the real problem here is that you don't want to say no to your sister, because she's going to react badly?

Just say no.

Is she with DNs dad or has a partner? It is very literally their job to help with these things. Not yours

Just say no.

We were asked to go on a trip to Disney Land and I couldn't think of a fresher hell. I said no and that it wasn't our thing.

She said Do you fancy she didn't send you a summons or threaten you.

If you don't fancy it just say no. Its not difficult. And no need to be annoyed at her either.

Just say no.

"Thanks, it's a nice thought but DD is too little and I don't think it'd be much fun for her being in the pram all day - one for when she's a bit bigger and we can accompany you all. Have a great time!"

That way she'll have to ask outright if it's actually your help she's after and it's the lack of transparency that's frustrating you (it would irritate me too). If she asks outright and you still don't want to then just say "Sorry, we have plans that day." or "Sorry, I'd rather keep the money I'd spend on the ticket for doing something with DD that she'd enjoy." Then if you want to you can invite your sister and her kids to an activity that would suit all the kids (and if you don't want to then that's fine too, you're not obliged to and it's perfectly OK to say no).

We took dd to Cbeebies land at Aston Towers when she was 2 and she loved it and we had a great day - the shows were especially good and we paid a toddler special rate. However the queues for adult big rides are all 2-3 hours which would definitely not make for a fun day with little ones about. I'd say no but would suggest an alternative day you'd like to do together.

If you don't want to go, just say so. What's with the drama and (deleted) long post?

whatever her phrasing and intention, I think you are gigivng this too much headspace. Tell her no thanks and move on.

I personally would enjoy that and would take my sister up on the offer. The simple suggestion of it wouldn't annoy me. You can say 'actually doesn't sound like my kind of thing but thanks for the invite'.

Another one here who doesn't understand what the drama is? If you don't want to go because it won't really be a break for you and just end up costing you money then tell her?

Do you have a communication problem?

I don't think you'd be much help with the boys and rides given you will have the baby there. Do you like big rides and she doesn't? That's the only way I can think of where she'd potentially be "using" you - she'd offer to sit out with the baby while you go on the rides with the bigger kids? If it really is about turn taking, then I don't see what she is being cheeky about. I'd just decline and say you'd like to go in a few years when dc can appreciate ceebeebies land.

You are getting way too worked up about this. Maybe she did thunk you would enjoy it and wanted you to know if you came she wouldn't just leave you sitting around, that she would sit with your dd while you went on the rides. Why would she pat for your ticket AND your dinner? I assume you're an adult?

If the kids are of an age where they can go on all the rides, and she goes on them then actually she doesn’t need you to come and look after them as she would go in the rides with them. So maybe she was trying to be nice and invite you out if she thought you would like the rides? If she’s missing out on rides to let you go on some then that’s actually her being nice?
Just say no if you don’t want to go

Have never been to AT but from what I've read it's not really baby friendly. Fair enough, if you got a nice day it would be great to have a stroll around in the fresh air, what happens if its tiddling down ? If its something you would enjoy , do it. If not, dont

Just say no thanks?

Just say no, no, just say no, say nooooo.

I would take it as my sister wanting to spend time with me and also her not wanting to be the only adult in kiddie company (I'd feel the same).

You are channelling it into being something negative probably bc you are a bit tired and overwhelmed with having a young baby. People with older kids often forget how all-consuming having a baby can be.
But unless there is a massive backstory re your relationship with your dsis I would just take it as it was probably intended and either say yes or no depending on what you want to do.

To quote the mumsnet classic line: it's an invitation, not a summons!

Is there a difficulty in telling her that her text annoyed you?

@Chocolattay

It’s the phrasing that annoys me. If she’d have said “Do you fancy helping me out with DN1, DN2 and DN1’s 2 friends at Alton Towers? I will buy you dinner.” I wouldn’t even have minded. And I’d have happily done it and left baby with DH.

But she phrased it as if it’ll be a great fun day and she automatically said bring the baby. She adores my DD.

It just sounds like a stressful, annoying day for me.

So you're annoyed by her words, not by what she wants to do. If that's the case, happily leave baby with DH and go. Don't start a row about the words she used in an text, that's petty and silly.

Do you have a good relationship with your sister? Does she have form for being manipulative or a user? If not then l wonder why you would automatically think she had an ulterior motive. Maybe she thought it could be mutually beneficial but there's not much wrong with that.

You have been invited somewhere, would you believe there are some people would think Alton Towers is a nice day out, you don’t, so decline. But there is no need to be so outraged at being invited somewhere!

If she’s got form for dressing up “can you help me with this?” as a fun thing or favour to you I can see why you’d be irritated. If she hasn’t then not.

I have a friend that does dress up favours for her as fun for me and it does get irritating. If you want help then use words and ask for it.

Do you want to go or not?

If not-easy!

If yes-would you be able to make sure you got your zurns?

Go without baby & don't join in the childcare??

Anyone else remember it before it became a theme park?

"Do you want to go to X?"

"No, not really, thanks though. Enjoy."

Done. Just use your words.

Honestly since you deleted your first message I think the problem is somewhat lost in translation.

Having said that, I have a sister (who knows my username so I'm putting this diplomatically) and I know how deeply they are able to hit exactly the button that will make you most irritated. Is it that you feel she is asking you for help and dressing it up as a favour to you? Classic sister move.

Having said that a day at Alton Towers with my sister sounds like a right laugh so maybe you can pull the thorn of irritation out of your skin and send @notanothertakeaway's message above?