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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Lost my deposit-AIBU?

231 replies

Outofpocket2022 · 12/03/2022 12:28

Not sure if AIBU to feel a bit annoyed by all of this….
My family and all live in different parts of the country, and although we all visit each other’s different houses etc at various points we try to get all together once a year for a meal out-generally on Mother’s Day.

We booked a restaurant (not a chain-small family owned type place) midway between all of us for Mother’s Day in 2020 but the pandemic happened and it got cancelled. We’d paid a pretty substantial deposit of £70, and the restaurant got in touch to offer either a full refund or that if we still wanted to visit then they would issue a voucher for the sum of the deposit plus a % extra per person as a thank you.
We accepted the voucher (perhaps foolishly in hindsight) and didn’t think anything more of it. Mother’s day 2021 came around and lockdown was still in place so we didn’t book anything.

Fast forward to 2022 and I booked the same restaurant again for Mother’s Day. They emailed asking for a deposit so we got back in touch to explain about the voucher.

Problem is, the voucher has expired.

I’m really annoyed with myself that I didn’t check in advance and also that I didn’t get back in touch with them perhaps the same time last year. But everything was still shut and it didn’t really cross my mind. The restaurant isn’t somewhere we’d pass so wouldn’t have been on the radar for us to visit earlier. I got back in contact with them via email to explain the circumstances and asked if they would be able to reconsider letting us use our part of the deposit (not the extra % they added on for goodwill) and it was a flat no. The response was from the owner rather than other staff so I’m pretty sure it’s the final answer. They said that everyone else who was issue a voucher has used it and they were a small business who had been impacted by Covid and they hoped we understood.

It’s not their fault that the voucher had expired-that’s 100% on us and we should have checked. But £70 is a lot of money to us and it feels a little bit snakey if I’m honest. Especially as they’d asked for our support in the early part of the pandemic by having a voucher issues rather than taking the refund.

So yeh, feeling a bit peeved but would be good to hear others opinions-AIBU?

OP posts:
Lockheart · 12/03/2022 14:25

Sorry OP but I think this is on you. It's a shame, but you didn't lose your deposit.

You were originally given the choice of a full refund or a voucher. You chose the voucher, which showed the expiry date.

No-one in your family checked the voucher or followed up.

The business fulfilled its obligations when it gave you the voucher that you chose. What you do with it after that is on you.

I'm not sure why people are encouraging you to slag them off online. If I saw a review bitching about the fact that they didn't use a voucher on time I'd think the poster was a) thick and b) entitled.

Thisisit2022 · 12/03/2022 14:31

I won a voucher for a restaurant that expired in 2020. They added another year onto it due to COVID which was really decent of them. Left a hefty tip after our meal.

LondonDadToBe · 12/03/2022 14:33

@GiftWrappingLikeItsXmasEve

I think hospitality was affected badly by pandemic. If it’s a small business I’d say you really should have checked the date.
Small businesses in particular should not be stealing a customers money when they did them a favour by accepting the voucher rather than demand a refund in the first place.
ronjobbins · 12/03/2022 14:33

@SalsaLove

I get where they are coming from but I think they should honour the voucher as a goodwill gesture and a way to get more customers. Now, it’s doubtful you will ever go there or recommend it to anyone else.
This, ask them to reissue as a gesture of goodwill.
LondonDadToBe · 12/03/2022 14:36

@Lockheart

Sorry OP but I think this is on you. It's a shame, but you didn't lose your deposit.

You were originally given the choice of a full refund or a voucher. You chose the voucher, which showed the expiry date.

No-one in your family checked the voucher or followed up.

The business fulfilled its obligations when it gave you the voucher that you chose. What you do with it after that is on you.

I'm not sure why people are encouraging you to slag them off online. If I saw a review bitching about the fact that they didn't use a voucher on time I'd think the poster was a) thick and b) entitled.

There is absolutely no business justification for a one year expiry date at any time let alone during a pandemic.

It would not cost this restaurant a penny to honour the voucher - they would literally just be allowing the OP to use their own money that they paid. Holding the money is nothing more than stealing IMO.

PuppyMonkey · 12/03/2022 14:39

I'm probably just a bit dim, but I don't really understand the point some are making about it "not being fair" for the restaurant to have the use of the voucher hanging over them indefinitely.

I think if OP paid a deposit of ÂŁ70 and, when the lockdowns happened, agreed to accept the voucher instead of a refund, the restaurant has a duty to honour that no matter how much time has passed.Confused

drawingpad · 12/03/2022 14:40

@ConsuelaHammock

It’s very unfair of the restaurant. I’d put it all over social media. Then I’d book a table and not turn up. Not really but I’d really want to get them back.

I really do wonder about the mentality of some people. What a fucking weird post Hmm

drawingpad · 12/03/2022 14:42

I think if OP paid a deposit of ÂŁ70 and, when the lockdowns happened, agreed to accept the voucher instead of a refund, the restaurant has a duty to honour that no matter how much time has passed.

No they don't. The voucher was valid for a whole year and the restaurant was open for part of said year.

ResurrectionInfinity · 12/03/2022 14:44

Given the pubs were shut for two successive Mothers’ Days, they are being a bit unreasonable, but there it is.

EveryCloudIsGrey · 12/03/2022 14:52

I'd try writing to them again? Explain that you supported them and that you feel they are being a little unfair.

Id also check out their company finances online if you can. It might give some indication how much they struggled over lockdown.

JellybeansJelly · 12/03/2022 14:52

@ResurrectionInfinity

Given the pubs were shut for two successive Mothers’ Days, they are being a bit unreasonable, but there it is.
OP had a whole year to use it, not just for Mother’s Day.
SpiderVersed · 12/03/2022 14:52

OP, my mistake - You are quite right, it was the 22nd, so a couple of days into things shutting down.

LondonDadToBe · 12/03/2022 15:05

Except that the booking was specifically because they gather for Mother’s Day each year and it involves members of the family travelling to a location midway between them all to do so.

So it’s nonsense to argue they could have used it at any time in the year.

Unfortunately this restaurant will only make things harder for small businesses - taking the voucher instead of the refund was a good thing for OP to do. At a tough time, vouchers rather than refunds kept cash flow in small businesses. She’s now being rewarded for this by the restaurant stealing her money even though it would cost them nothing to honour the voucher.

All the more reason for the law to ban this sort of charlatan behaviour as they have in Ireland.

Wexone · 12/03/2022 15:09

I agree I think they are being very unreasonable. they did offer you a refund or a voucher and you took the voucher thinking it was helping the business. how many of us bought vouchers for local restaurants and shops during the lockdown especially over Xmas period to help businesses out. I think that vouchers should be treated like money and have no expiry date. I would defoe ring them back and nicely explain to them or write an email. we here in Ireland do as people have siad do have a law stating that all vouchers bought after the 1st December must last 5 years. I am surprised the UK don't have this law actually. but I disagree with people saying its your fault

LuaDipa · 12/03/2022 15:15

@JellybeansJelly

Mothers Day 2020 was immediately before we went into lockdown, so restaurants were still open then. So considering they even offered a refund at all was reasonable of them.

You had a whole year to use the voucher, and you didn’t. You now want to use it a whole year after.

I already said YABU, but well done on not being a person who posts a spiteful review.

It was the day before lockdown and at the time everyone was terrified. I can’t imagine anyone wanting to meet up with their potentially older and vulnerable family members for a nice lunch. If they hadn’t offered a refund at that point they would have been slaughtered. The only mistake op made was trying to be kind, she clearly should have just taken the refund.

Businesses may be struggling but if they don’t remember the customers who supported them when they were on their knees they might not be able to count on that support going forward.

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 12/03/2022 15:18

@Vitani

I don't really understand the expiry of vouchers and gift cards tbh. If they are willing to offer them, what difference does the date it is used actually make with regards to somehow negatively impacting the restaurant? If you are willing to offer a ÂŁ70 voucher, why would it being used in 1, 2, or 3 years even matter.
Because when the voucher is actually redeemed, the business often doesn't make money - as the money was made when the voucher was sold.

So if in 2020, they sold say, 20 ÂŁ50 vouchers - they want to know that all those vouchers have to be used by 2021 at the latest, so they can factor in those days where people show up with vouchers and don't spend any extra.

Many businesses don't offer vouchers for that reason.

paintfairy · 12/03/2022 15:20

Ordinarily I would say tough. But because it was because of covid and it was closed for the most part or rules meant you couldn't go, then having a 12 month expiry date is out of order imo. Not to mention they were the ones that cancelled your booking originally. So it's not really a very nice thing for them to do.

ResurrectionInfinity · 12/03/2022 15:29

Mother’s Day 2020 was before lockdown but the pubs had been ordered to close on the Friday before.

ResurrectionInfinity · 12/03/2022 15:30

Mothers’ Day
Bloody autocorrect

drawingpad · 12/03/2022 15:31

@paintfairy

Ordinarily I would say tough. But because it was because of covid and it was closed for the most part or rules meant you couldn't go, then having a 12 month expiry date is out of order imo. Not to mention they were the ones that cancelled your booking originally. So it's not really a very nice thing for them to do.

OP should have taken the refund then. The restaurant have been more then reasonable here.

crowsfeet57 · 12/03/2022 15:39

They are a business not a charity, be more careful

I'd lay odds the op isn't a charity either!

grapewines · 12/03/2022 15:46

@C152

I feel YABU here. The restaurant initially offered you a refund or a voucher, and you chose the voucher. I would be annoyed to have lost the deposit as well but, as you admit, you didn't check the expiry date and you didn't follow up with them for 2 years. The restaurant haven't been sly at all, and their response seems reasonable to me.
Yeah, sorry. This one is on you.
Phormiumjester · 12/03/2022 15:52

Has everyone forgotten 2020 when people were buying vouchers from restaurants to keep them afloat early pandemic?? This is basically what the OP did. In 2020 asking for the refund not the voucher would have resulted I a MN pile-on!

ImInStealthMode · 12/03/2022 15:58

It would not cost this restaurant a penny to honour the voucher - they would literally just be allowing the OP to use their own money that they paid. Holding the money is nothing more than stealing IMO.

Not that the cancellation was OP's fault, but her deposit was spent way back in March 2020 on stock for Mothers Day that would then have been binned when lockdown came in.

The restaurant (whose fault it also was not) did the right thing when they couldn't offer a service and offered her a full refund, or a higher value voucher to use within the next 12 months. If she'd taken them up on either it would have come from the restaurant's pocket, her money has long been in the bin.

OP didn't take them up on this so it's her loss. The restaurant have done nothing wrong and the idea that they've been sitting on her money for 2 years and are now happily pocketing it is absurd.

SometimesRavenSometimesParrot · 12/03/2022 16:03

If the voucher was for 12 months I would expect them to add on the months they were closed or it wouldn’t have been possible to use it, to be honest. It’s not a 12 month voucher when they would have been closed March-June 2020, probably for most of Autumn 2020, all of Jan-April 2021