To be losing my looks in my early 30’s

[Samantha312]

Anybody else feel the same? I felt really attractive in my 20’s..but now with 2 young children I feel ugly and old. Is it just a phase?

Can you ever look as good as you were in your 20’s?

I definitely look better in my late 30s than I did in my 20s or even early 30s. I just feel that my face has sort of settled, my hair colour is softer, I don't drink or smoke any more so my skin is much better and I don't do the full-on Urban Decay eye make-up regime I was a slave to in the past. I also think I'm just happier, smilier and more at ease with myself and that helps too. I'm a bit heavier than I was and much less into looking polished but I don't care, which helps the cause a bit!

I feel exactly the same OP. Also in the same situation (early 30s, young kids)

I’m 30 and whilst I’ve started to get a few crows feet around the eyes etc my skin is not as greasy and my face has slimmed down so I quite like how I look now. I was very slim in my 20s but with a chubby cheeks sort of look and I feel more elegant in a grown up way now. I use eye cream every night which helps me feel a bit better about things too lol.

Unless you've had some sort of accident / illness / gained several stone that has altered your appearance significantly you can't look very different, if at all, to how you looked in your 20s.

It's how you feel about yourself that has changed, and possibly your hair and what you wear. Also without opportunities to dress up and make the best of yourself for a night out, we can forget how well we brush up.

Do you have a partner? If so, I suggest a few date nights which give you a reason to put on your best 'going out' look. If you don't have a partner arrange a girls' night out somewhere, even if it's just the pub.

If you were attractive in your twenties you are still attractive, and will remain so, right up through your 60s until looks unfortunately do start to fade.

Do you think you can still be as attractive in your 30’s…but in a different way?

Yes that's a good way of putting it. You can look like an attractive x year old women. That's not bad or good, it just is. You are the age you are.

Yes I’m 33 and dear god I feel a mess! 3 year old and 9 month old. Recently bitterly disappointed that a new haircut did not take 10 years off. Still look like shit. No fancy creams work. Definitely think I look 43. Not sure if hammering the coffee is helping either ? Maybe dehydrating me and could be doing with drinking more water and shedding 2 stone. Some sunshine/holiday wouldn’t go a miss 🤣

Yep. Crows feet kicking in for me too! I suppose I’ll just have to just look the best I can 😊 I don’t like the filler/Botox look myself I suppose if done properly could look really good. I always thought I would age gracefully and not give a damn 🙄

I felt like that in my early 30s with babies & toddlers, knackered, overweight, relentless domestic work. But by early 40s I felt the complete opposite, prime of my life, fitter, slimmer, and more confident than ever before. Its a phase, it will pass.

I’m 30, I feel the same. So twice a week I wear make up & use fake tan at times. I doubt you look ugly. Treat yourself to some nice skincare/make up or hair. That’ll make you feel better

For many women, me included, it's a matter of losing how you looked, grieving, then readjusting. Loss, grief, readjustment. Over and over.

I don't look how I did at 35, but I am far happier in my skin, need far less external validation, and consequently I feel pretty good about myself considering.

I felt like that when my DC were little. I was tired and hassled. I also felt like I lost my way style wise having been pretty trendy as a teen and in my 20s. I felt good in my 40s and early 50s but my late 50s - now - not so much.

Sorry but this thread is rather sad, it's depressing to see how many people think it's all downhill after the age of 30. It really isn't.

I'm 31 and I have lost a little bit of fat in my face but that's it, I don't really have any lines apart from very faint ones around my eyes and I don't have baggy eyes or grey skin etc.
You can look attractive and fresh at any age. Ok, maybe at 80 years old things are going to be different but there are many women in their 50s who look amazing and beautiful. They don't look 20, but it really doesn't matter.
Being attractive isn't synonymous with looking under 30.
You really don't get uglier as you age. We don't 'lose our looks' they just change.
It's really not a one size fits all thing.

My Mum's 55 and I consider her as attractive. She looks older than I do but it doesn't make her any less attractive. One of my friends in his 30s called her hot recently!

Sorry but once you hit about 35, unless you have exceptional genes and very little stress, you are going to sag in all the wrong places. Wrinkles, double chins, saggy boobs (men and women!).

As a man I think people assume that men don't worry about this stuff too. That's simply untrue. Sure men don't judge other men as much but we also feel ugly and fat a lot of the time.

You can't stop the passage of time. We will all inevitably end up looking s**t and thats okay. I took a while to accept that I look crap compared to when I was 25. Now I don't care all that much because - unless you are going to use plastic to fix your face - everyone always ages. Often badly.

In my 20s/ early thirties I was busy bringing up my kids.
I'm now 46 and look better than ever....its not just physical changes but more confident. Yes I've got a few more wrinkles but I've also got knowledge, strength & confidence.

@Thejoyfulstar

My face is "settling" - like a subsiding house complete w/ cracks, damp and mould :(

Just looked at Davina McCall's Instagram page, her body is amazing! She's 54

@Burgoo haha! Definitely a few structural issues here too

We just got to accept it I suppose…wisdom over looks? Ha. I see some very sexy older women…I hope I’m the same x

Worry not! You will actually start to look younger again once the kids are both at school and you’re not so drained. It’s a thing I promise! You won’t look 21 again but you can look fit and healthy and glow.