Annoying audience members in the theatre

[beverleybass]

Does anybody else ALWAYS seem to have seats right by the worst people in the theatre. I must just be unlucky.

This year saw Come From Away and was directly behind 3 women who kept chatting all the way through, including during really emotional and key moments and solos. Someone tapped them on the shoulder and told them to shush in the end which improved things slightly.

I also saw Cinderella and more chatters as well phones coming out constantly with their shining lights.

What is the point spending all that money on tickets to look at your phone or chat to people??

Anyway saw Mamma Mia as a birthday treat today and it was honestly the worst of the lot. People on my row playing musical chairs, people arriving up to fifteen mins late (and still being let in) the man to the left of me kept singing along with the songs, the people in front chatting and constantly zipping/unzipping bags and rustling noisy bags of snacks.

How hard is it to sit still and be quiet

@Drinkyourweaklemondrink

We saw dirty dancing recently and the mad bints in front of us were texting with bright lights on. Really loudly sharing wine from a big glass bottle and then diluting it with lemonade which they kept on spilling. One literally started video calling someone in the middle of the show. And they chatted incessantly. I did wonder why the hell they bothered.

People are such arseholes.

I'm totally with you on this OP - this is what Netflix and online theatre courtesy of our local independent cinema are for!

[quote DottyHarmer]@CognitiveDissolver - no way the person shouted . It would have at most been a stern voice. I simply can’t believe that you weren’t embarrassed that your companion had behaved in an anti-social manner, instead of relentlessly defending their right to annoy others.[/quote]
@DameHelena see what I mean?

@Cheshirecatwoman I wonder if we were at the same show!? I too saw Wicked last weekend and commented to my friend at one point about it being like Piccadilly Circus! I've never been to a show and seen THAT many people up and down to use the loo etc! Also for the first 30 mins there was constant rustling from crisp/popcorn bags, like a horrible backing track! Food should be banned in my opinion - I want to watch a show not listen to someone chewing crisps in my ear!

Changechangychange, yes, but this poster wasn't asking 'did she really shout?'; they were assuming she had shouted (which is possibly contentious I know, but that's not the point here. They were asking 'Do you understand what made the person shout?' and the reply (deliberately or not) misunderstood the question.

You asked “why do you think she was shouting?” Which could be taken to mean “what do you think caused her to start shouting”, or “what on earth made you interpret her soft and entirely reasonable whisper as a shout”.

Look, neither of us know whether that poster misinterpreted what you meant on purpose or not. But when other people on the thread have been telling her she made it up and the shouter was actually gently remonstrating with her, it wasn’t an outlandish assumption that you meant the same.

Oh no… this has me scared, I’m not from the UK and and after soooo long I’m finally gonna see phantom of the opera in may, which has been a dream of mine since childhood and I’m so looking forward to it but this post has me scared I won’t be able to enjoy it!

There was an article in the Grauniad at the weekend about this. There was a hint of snobbery about it, as it was said that it seems to be particularly bad at "jukebox musicals" (i.e. not your normal theatregoers, who apparently know how to behave), where (gasp) "people sang along".

www.theguardian.com/stage/2022/mar/05/trouble-in-the-stalls-audience-theatre-disruptive-behaviour-noisy

But yes, it's not just limited to the theatre, - concerts, films, shows, school plays - you name it, some despond with zero self awareness and a sense of entitlement and self-importance will give you a running commentary and/or film the whole thing on a shaky mobile phone.

Someone asked "Have social skills massively deteriorated after lockdown or am I just old and miserable" - no, it was just as appalling before lockdown. I went to the theatre recently, featuring local school performances, and mums, dads and children talked all the way through other people's performances, but demanded quiet for their own kids (and stood the whole way through this filming, blocking everyone's view, and THEN decided the whole family would leave after their offspring's performance, disrupting the show still further).

As J-PS said "L'Enfer, c'est les autres" (Hell is other people).

@Changechangychange

You asked “why do you think she was shouting?” Which could be taken to mean “what do you think caused her to start shouting”, or “what on earth made you interpret her soft and entirely reasonable whisper as a shout”.

Look, neither of us know whether that poster misinterpreted what you meant on purpose or not. But when other people on the thread have been telling her she made it up and the shouter was actually gently remonstrating with her, it wasn’t an outlandish assumption that you meant the same.

1. I didn't ask it; it was a poster named ancientgran.
2. that poster, after Cognitive answered the wrong question, clarified their meaning. Here's the relevant snippet: 'That doesn't answer the question does it. I said why do you think she was shouting. Do you think it was because your friend was annoying her or is there some other reason a woman would suddenly be so angry.'

This absolutely boils my p*ss. People need to make all efforts to arrive on time, make sure they've had a wee well in advance of the curtain call bell, get in, sat down, and shut the hell up. If a person can't sit for an hour without eating, having a beer, or a wee, then they shouldn't be there. And people should be banned from rattley sweets and noisy/smelly foods. And no constant coughs. This is why I can no longer enjoy live theatre. I went to the ballet some years ago, a man 3 seats away did nothing but constantly loudly sniff every fews seconds, I was nearly out of my mind by the interval. Christ....

You are not unlucky. People are absolutely ignorant with zero manners. People cant sit for a couple of hours. I have cut down on going to shows because of this.

@Mmmmdanone

Recently went to see Chicago with my elderly mum and teenage daughter and the amount of boozed up, loud, singing aresholes was unreal. But then again if I'd been with different company I may have also had a drink and joined in 🤫

Went to see Chicago in January. Sat next to six people, five of whom arrived literally just before it started and that’s fine. But then another turned up 15mins after the start

They all had drinks from bar and then had bought cans of drink in!!!!

The lad next to me then talked all the way through first half until bloke in front shouted at them

Then girl he was chatting to had to get up to go to toilet so everyone had to get up to let her out and back in again 😡😡

Then they came back with more drinks but were more quiet but still moving in seats constantly

Then at end woman at end of row who they were with wouldn’t stand up to let anyone out so we just had to climb over her

It totally ruined what should have been a lovely show. And it can’t have been cheap for them buying six tickets three rows from the front

There is absolutely no excuse!! It’s just rude full stop

I went to a show and a bunch of drunken women were talking loudly right from the start,people were tapping them on the shoulder telling them to be quiet.Anyway next minute a massive brawl broke out,it was horrendous,all the theatre lights came on,security,ushers the lot trying to break it up.Why oh why do they even bother going.

@Lopoem

It's probably a good job I don't go to the Theatre. I don't think I could resist a good sing along if I was watching Mamma Mia. Surely that's the point? The rest is rude though.

Yes, it probably is a good job you don't go to the theatre to be honest.

DH and I went to a gorgeous production of Romeo and Juliet only to find the women behind me giving a running commentary of what was happening to a child of about 11 who was with her. I tolerated it for a long time, despite it really ruining the experience. In the end, I did the traditional shush that people have done in theatres for generations. It them became apparent from her ranting response (at one point she pushed me in the back) that she was drunk. She went on an on, telling me that I thought I was better than her and that I just viewed her as a Luddite. I refrained from explaining to her that she clearly misunderstood the definition of Luddite, since it would have inflamed her further. She said that me saying shush had upset her niece, the same niece who looked afraid of her aunt at this point. There was no security or any other staff around, but so many people now could no longer hear the play. This experience put me off going to the theatre. A large number of members of audiences now get to drink throughout the productions now. I don’t want another drunken encounter with one of them.

No point is waiting for others to chastise selfish folk. Just tell the you are unhappy regarding their selfish behaviour.

It irritates me deeply when I hear intelligent folk swearing. - particularly the ‘f’ word. I can cope with the uneducated swearing. Not those who should know how insulting it is for me to hear.
I now say to those swearing I find it rude and I’d rather they didn’t use gutter talk to me.
Well it seems to annoy some and others just stop swearing in my company.

It’s the same in theatre or cinema, just tell the guilty party how you find their behaviour rude and unthoughtful. Some folk are just selfish.

Oh yes I feel your pain !
Bette milder concert …she specifically asked people not to sing along …. Idiot next to me starts singing “wing beneath my wings” as she was singing it … the Legend Bette… I had been talking to him before the concert started to be polite … I didn’t say good bye … I blanked him …

And seeing Wicked … people behind singing song …. Dirty dancing … whole crowd of grown women … shouting about laughing loudly …
The staff their were asking them all the time to sit down etc …many other examples …. Those stand out the most 😂

I can’t remember the last time I was in a cinema. I stopped going because of the poor behaviour of others. It’s lights from phones etc and people holding conversations that are my main gripes. I sort of expect the odd sweetie wrapper being rustled or someone nipping down the aisle to head to the loo. But once my ear tunes in to someone talking I can’t block it out. Same with random lights in my peripheral vision. Any chance of being immersed in the film is out the window. Usually the people speaking are across the aisle and to my side rather than behind me or in front of me so too far away to say something to them. And unless I want to completely miss a whole portion of the film and ensure that even more people are disturbed it doesn’t feel worthwhile heading out to the foyer to find a member of staff. I have asked people to please stop talking and got a mouthful of abuse back. I don’t understand why someone would shell out £10 for a ticket to just sit and chat with their neighbour. At a cinema trip to see Mama Mia we actually moved seats to get away from someone who was doing the running commentary thing for the child beside her. Blow me if she didn’t follow us - she must have thought we had insider information about where the best seats were.

Live theatre is such an unnatural setting, often with very sparse set design and actors moving props and bits of scenery etc in between scenes. Being fully immersed in the experience is challenging enough without selfish knobheads deciding to chat and fidget and text etc. I just don’t enjoy the experience anymore

I’ve even spoken to selfish arses at live tennis matches. I sat for as long as I could and during a change if ends ended up snapping and turning round and telling them to please stop talking whilst play was in progress. Fine at change of ends and even in between points whilst there was clapping but not during play. When I turned back one of the little shits said in a sarky voice “ well that’s us told”. I turned round again and said “yes it is”. The younger man next to me turned around and said “actually she is correct….you shouldn’t talk during play”. It wasn’t as if they were whispering to each other or commenting on whether a ball was in or out. They were talking at normal speaking volume.

And then there is the whole phenomenon of people spend 15-20 minutes during a concert or tennis match queued at a bar for hideously overpriced booze. I don’t understand why alcohol has to be a higher priority that actually watching the event itself

Arseholes like those people are everywhere now. In the cinema too. We stopped going to our local cabaret bar because we liked to sit in the expensive seats but couldn't hear the show because of cackling, chattering morons.

@Buggersticks

This absolutely boils my p*ss. People need to make all efforts to arrive on time, make sure they've had a wee well in advance of the curtain call bell, get in, sat down, and shut the hell up. If a person can't sit for an hour without eating, having a beer, or a wee, then they shouldn't be there. And people should be banned from rattley sweets and noisy/smelly foods. And no constant coughs. This is why I can no longer enjoy live theatre. I went to the ballet some years ago, a man 3 seats away did nothing but constantly loudly sniff every fews seconds, I was nearly out of my mind by the interval. Christ....

Totally agree. Most recent experience of Les miserables in Liverpool was almost constant movement of people getting up and down for drinks/the loo. The late arrivals are really disruptive. I have a friend who arrives with seconds to spare then insists on going to the loo making us a couple of minutes late for our seats. I hate it so I don't invite her anymore. If the theatre is at 7.30, I get there at 7. Half an hour to get a drink, order interval drinks, use to loo and find our seats in a nice relaxed fashion. Can't tolerate the constant late arrivals.

I looked up the guardian article someone mentioned www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/stage/2022/mar/05/trouble-in-the-stalls-audience-theatre-disruptive-behaviour-noisy?client=safari

Turns out it can be even worse

Can I ask are you sitting in the stalls or the balcony? Lol

You have been really unlucky! The worst I can remember was seeing Carlos Acosta dance and the couple in front were having a dinner of many courses out of plastic bags. At the interval when people on their row wanted to pass them they gave everyone filthy looks because they had to pack away all their cartons and boxes.
A friend got us great seats for Wicked and as we were waiting for the show to start a huge huge man walked in. We were laughing to ourselves about how unlucky it would be for the person he sat in front of. It was me! Could see noting and felt very aware that I was shifitng abut and bugging the person behind me.
Generally I think I am quite lucky. But I splash out on good seats when I can - front row of circle so I minimise the risk.

Yanbu! Far too many inconsiderate people with no etiquette! Not meant in a snobby way, purely respect for others and certain unsaid rules to abide by so allow enjoyment. Plain manners really, sadly lacking a lot to many.

Just to add to my previous post. I went to the theatre recently with my mum and DD and it was lovely! I have realised I find the theatre very stressful with DH. He always goes to the loo at the last minute and then pisses everyone off by making them stand up so he can get to his seat seconds before curtain up. I go in without him as I can't bear to be rushing. He never finsihes his drink at the interval and takes it back in and sips it all the way through. Just bloomin' drink it down and stop faffing!