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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How far would you travel for a class mates birthday party?

46 replies

TacoCats · 04/03/2022 17:59

My DC was invited to a party 45 minutes drive away today by one of his school friends, AIBU to think that's just a bit to far? Would you travel?

OP posts:
Fizzgigg · 04/03/2022 18:00

Is that far? I live in London and could easily have to spend that travelling on the tube/trains to a party

billy1966 · 04/03/2022 18:00

Not unless it was a very close friend.

Original poster
TacoCats · 04/03/2022 18:01

It is far for us, I live rurally no buses/trains etc there.

OP posts:
Tigofigo · 04/03/2022 18:01

YANBU

Chickychoccyegg · 04/03/2022 18:02

Definitely not.

moita · 04/03/2022 18:02

Yes I think it's far.

AmyFl · 04/03/2022 18:03

If the party was at the party child's house which is 45 minutes drive away I would attend -if it was at a venue (like soft play) 45 minutes away then that is different, and is a long drive away.

DockOTheBay · 04/03/2022 18:03

That would be too far for a random school friend. A best friend, maybe, if they were going to somewhere really special like a theme park. If it was just a soft play or bowling which could be done closer, I would question why it was so far away.

To answer your question my max would probably be about 20 mins before I would start to consider not taking her.

Original poster
TacoCats · 04/03/2022 18:04

Yes it's an soft play centre. There are places closer so not sure why they've picked somewhere really far away not many parents in DC class drive either.

OP posts:
SouthOfFrance · 04/03/2022 18:06

Depends what the activity was and if it was a close friend or if my child wanted to go.

It would also depend on how long the party was for and what there was to do for the parents waiting around to bring them home.

Also, how old is the child? Could a few children go in one parents car?

SouthOfFrance · 04/03/2022 18:08

OK so soft play. Perhaps it's a nicer/cleaner one, or had availability on the day they wanted.

If people can't drive or don't fancy it then they will just decline the invite won't they.

Original poster
TacoCats · 04/03/2022 18:09
  1. Yes I know they won't obviously go, it was just a question really to see if I was being unreasonable by saying no to DC. They aren't close friends either.
OP posts:
SheWoreYellow · 04/03/2022 18:10

I would but I’d lift share or find something nearby to do.

Loopytiles · 04/03/2022 18:11

Not unusual here (home counties)

TheTurn0fTheScrew · 04/03/2022 18:12

we've been to ones that far. Bit of a PITA to be honest but I couldn't think of a reason to say no. To be fair we did lots of lift sharing in the peak party years.

BertieQueen · 04/03/2022 18:14

We have had this a lot when my son was younger. Everyone seemed to pick party venues that were a distance.

I remember one party before covid it was a 50 minute drive on a Saturday afternoon and the local football club was playing so it took a hour and half in the end to get to the venue and then there was no parking so was another 15 minute walk. Never again!! Angry

hangrylady · 04/03/2022 18:16

Yeah I would and have.

hangrylady · 04/03/2022 18:17

@TacoCats

Yes it's an soft play centre. There are places closer so not sure why they've picked somewhere really far away not many parents in DC class drive either.
Really? You live rurally and not many people drive?
glowingpink · 04/03/2022 18:20

I'd probably still go but I'd think it was a bit odd that they'd picked somewhere so far away. Maybe their friends/family run the venue and they're getting it for free?

Hasselhoffsheadband · 04/03/2022 18:29

Yes someone did this once, it was almost an hour away. It was a fairly 'unique' party, but there are plenty of options really close to us that are just as good. I didn't understand why they went so far, but of course I took my kid!

HeadToToesNo · 04/03/2022 18:32

I would regularly drive that far for a kids party, or for anything in fact, but I'm proper rural so even a trip to the shops is about an hour.
If you want to go, go. If you don't, don't.

RedskyThisNight · 04/03/2022 18:32

Unless you're rural and that's the norm, 45 minutes is about 30 minutes too far for a 7 year old's party.

Particularly because at 7, most parents will want to drop and go, but they won't be able to do that if it's so far from home.

cherryonthecakes · 04/03/2022 18:32

I live in the suburbs but when parties were that far away, the birthday child's parents drove everybody to the venue.

Hugasauras · 04/03/2022 18:36

We are pretty rural so wouldn't bother me! That's the distance to nearest city from us so would just be a normal kind of travelling distance for an 'event'.

Mumdiva99 · 04/03/2022 18:39

I booked my sons pool party 30 mins away and am now kicking myself. It's definitely too far to ask people to come - best friends and family will. It will be awesome because there are waves, a flume and inflatables. ...but honestly he would enjoy an empty pool if all his school kids came....we are planning to off lifts to some so he has a few friends.