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AIBU?

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Original poster

School letting 8 year old watch newsround

421 replies

rhonyvsrhobh · 24/02/2022 20:06

I think that it is important for children to know what is happening in the world - to an extent.

My 8 year old, primary 4 daughter came home today very upset and worried as she had seen on Newsround which is shown at her school that Russia have invaded Ukraine. She has asked me several times if we were going to get 'hit'. I have tried to reassure her that it won't happen (what else can I say) and not to worry. She then asked me to swear on her life that we won't be affected by it. I said I couldn't swear on her life but not to worry, it won't happen.

She is very anxious and I just don't think something so serious should have been shown to 8 year old children. I feel so sorry for them, they've had covid and now this!

AIBU to contact the school about this or am I being precious?

OP posts:
Serrina · 28/02/2022 00:02

@Cbtb

I mentioned the IRA because many parents on here must be about the same age, 1980s kids, our childhood was full of war -cold war, the falklands, NI and then the bombings of the UK, many NI posters of the same age grew up in a war zone. I had older schoolmates killed in Afghanistan when in secondary school who signed up at 18. We have been at war or involved in conflict for most of our adult lives and so discussing war shouldn't be some big . So many fb posts and upset social media -"omg how do i explain this horrid thing to my kids?" "why are their childhoods being stolen" "chgildren these days are exposed to. so much" I cant believe this is happening" We deal with it the same way our parents did for us and their parents did for them.

This doesn't mean its not a big deal but pretending that this isnt something that happens to people like us where we live is pointless. Its not stealing childhoods to mention it. War may come to our country again soon, I hope it doesn't. We shouldn't tell children not to be scared when they are scared of something scary and then pretend its not happening - that creates anxiety. Telling them "don't worry its far away" isnt going to reasure its just going to stop them asking questions. Admit the fear, take any practical steps to make things better you can and then get on with life.

Well said.
KittenKong · 28/02/2022 08:22

When I was at school I had classmates who went on (and their elder brothers when we were at school) killed by the IRA.

ThanksItHasPockets · 28/02/2022 08:44

@mamabear715

I asked my youngest (left school now) what he thought of this. He was wide eyed and wondered why teachers were putting the tv on at all and not TEACHING! ;-) Fair point, I'd have thought! ;-)
Was he aye Hmm
Changechangychange · 28/02/2022 10:10

We have Ukrainian friends, and there are plenty of Eastern European children in DS’s reception class. This isn’t “naughty people far away” to everyone’s child, and we shouldn’t sweep it under the carpet for the benefit of the majority.

We were a bit surprised when DS’s school talked to them about war on Remembrance Day, and we initially thought 4 was a bit young to be hearing about it. But then we thought about it, and realised the Nigerian children’s parents would have lived through civil war, the Cypriot boy would have family who remembered the Turkish invasion, and the Somali girls would definitely be aware of the civil war there. We are just very lucky in Western Europe that our civilian population hasn’t experienced war in 80 years.

GrannyRose15 · 28/02/2022 15:33

"Let children be children and give them as carefree a childhood as possible for as long as possible."

I agree Snippysocks.

It can be terrifying for a child to constantly think they are under threat as we've learnt only too well over the last two years.

It's not always the facts that are the problem - though I do think 8 is too young to learn about a war 2000 miles away - but the hyperbole, sensationalism and speculation that we are all constantly subjected to that is so dangerous to the well-being of sensitive, developing minds.

Future generations are going to pay a heavy price for what we have done to our children since March 2020 - adding to their anxiety unnecessarily now is only going to make matters worse.

GrannyRose15 · 28/02/2022 15:41

"We deal with it the same way our parents did for us and their parents did for them."

I think the problem is we do NOT deal with it like our parents dealt with it for us. Many parents today seem to have no concept of protecting their children from anything. No topic is out of bounds for even the youngest of children. Age appropriate sensitivity is what is needed - and what we got from our parents and grandparents.

Serrina · 28/02/2022 15:49

@GrannyRose15

"We deal with it the same way our parents did for us and their parents did for them."

I think the problem is we do NOT deal with it like our parents dealt with it for us. Many parents today seem to have no concept of protecting their children from anything. No topic is out of bounds for even the youngest of children. Age appropriate sensitivity is what is needed - and what we got from our parents and grandparents.

Hence why we have things like Newsround. Programmes like this can help us to explain things to children in an age-appropriate way without frightening them.
OpheliaThrupps · 28/02/2022 15:50

@rhonyvsrhobh

I think that it is important for children to know what is happening in the world - to an extent.

My 8 year old, primary 4 daughter came home today very upset and worried as she had seen on Newsround which is shown at her school that Russia have invaded Ukraine. She has asked me several times if we were going to get 'hit'. I have tried to reassure her that it won't happen (what else can I say) and not to worry. She then asked me to swear on her life that we won't be affected by it. I said I couldn't swear on her life but not to worry, it won't happen.

She is very anxious and I just don't think something so serious should have been shown to 8 year old children. I feel so sorry for them, they've had covid and now this!

AIBU to contact the school about this or am I being precious?

YABU&P
RedToothBrush · 28/02/2022 15:55

@GrannyRose15

"Let children be children and give them as carefree a childhood as possible for as long as possible."

I agree Snippysocks.

It can be terrifying for a child to constantly think they are under threat as we've learnt only too well over the last two years.

It's not always the facts that are the problem - though I do think 8 is too young to learn about a war 2000 miles away - but the hyperbole, sensationalism and speculation that we are all constantly subjected to that is so dangerous to the well-being of sensitive, developing minds.

Future generations are going to pay a heavy price for what we have done to our children since March 2020 - adding to their anxiety unnecessarily now is only going to make matters worse.

Oh for gods sake,

just teach them the concepts of hyperbole, sensationalism and speculation!

My 7 year old can grasp it. Bollocks is it too young.

Gynaesaur · 28/02/2022 17:18

Children are not being exposed to "hyperbole, sensationalism and speculation" through Newsround, though. They're receiving factual information about current affairs. It isn't a new thing, Newsround has been around for years. I watched the actual news most days with my grandparents when I was a child. Sometimes I found it upsetting or worrying but I'm just about old enough for those to have been thought of as ordinary, routine emotional responses, rather than a condemnation to a lifetime of anxiety.

TheMoth · 28/02/2022 20:58

It was interesting today to see how kids were reacting. Those who were fairly clued up and up for sensible discussion. We did a blanket, factual talk with all groups in form time, to ensure all kids got the same information, regardless of what they already knew. Conversely, ds' school did fuck all, so it's a good job I'd already armed him against the bollocks no doubt spouted on the yard.

Those who had heard snippets or done some tiktok scrolling were the ones coming out with 'I this ww3?' And 'will I get called up?'

So yes, talk to your kids. Explain to them so they DON'T become hysterical.

saraclara · 28/02/2022 23:46

@GrannyRose15

"We deal with it the same way our parents did for us and their parents did for them."

I think the problem is we do NOT deal with it like our parents dealt with it for us. Many parents today seem to have no concept of protecting their children from anything. No topic is out of bounds for even the youngest of children. Age appropriate sensitivity is what is needed - and what we got from our parents and grandparents.

The worst parenting mistake I ever made, was trying to protect my DDs from two separate really scary things that happened in our family. I tried to carry on as normal and try to make out it was nothing. This meant that they felt unable to talk about it, and instead just dwelled on how things just weren't right, put their own explanations on it, and worried even more.

Those mistakes have left their scars on them as adults, never mind when they were young. There is nothing I regret more than not facing up to them needing to know, and not sitting with them and explaining as simply and as unscarily as I could.

Newsround couldn't help in my situation, but in this one, having watched it, I think it did an amazing job of informing and reassuring at the same time. I'm very glad that those children had the benefit of it, rather than being 'protected' and ultimately scared more.

LondonQueen · 28/02/2022 23:52

Newsround is aimed at children that age. The school will take no action.

alltheapples · 28/02/2022 23:55

Kids can not avoid hearing about the war whether on social media or in the playground.
If you don't explain it, their own imagination may fill the gaps. They may imagine war as they have seen in films. They may imagine it will happen in Britain or where they live. They may think their dad will be sent to fight.
You do not stop anxiety by refusing to talk about something to kids.

AlexaShutUp · 01/03/2022 00:08

@GrannyRose15

"We deal with it the same way our parents did for us and their parents did for them."

I think the problem is we do NOT deal with it like our parents dealt with it for us. Many parents today seem to have no concept of protecting their children from anything. No topic is out of bounds for even the youngest of children. Age appropriate sensitivity is what is needed - and what we got from our parents and grandparents.

I'm so very grateful that my parents didn't underestimate my ability to understand what was going on in the world. It helped me to develop as an individual and I believe it helped me to learn how to process difficult new stories in a way that enables me to take an active interest now without any detrimental impact on my mental health. I see so many posters on here with out of control anxiety in response to stuff that's going on in the world. I suspect those posters were never taught to deal with this stuff properly as children. Thank goodness schools are stepping in to help fill in the gaps.
Migrainesbythedozen · 01/03/2022 00:24

The problem is if they are just bunging on the tv and not explaining to the class or holding a session like TheMoth did so they had the chance to talk about their fears/ask questions etc, it can do more harm than good. The school needs to interact with children on this, not just sit them in from of the tv and call it done.

Great job btw @TheMoth , that is how it should be done. Unfortunately too many are like the OP's DC. Not have any fears talked through in class.

liveforsummer · 02/03/2022 19:17

I think you lack faith in teachers if you're imagining they just Chuck it on for 10 minutes peace then move straight on to literacy or whatever

Migrainesbythedozen · 02/03/2022 20:19

@liveforsummer

I think you lack faith in teachers if you're imagining they just Chuck it on for 10 minutes peace then move straight on to literacy or whatever
@liveforsummer If you read the thread you will notice another teacher on here said her son's school basically did exactly that. There was no discussion. It's also clear that is what happened with the OP's daughter's school too.
liveforsummer · 02/03/2022 20:22

@Migrainesbythedozen was she there, in the class?

Migrainesbythedozen · 02/03/2022 20:24

[quote liveforsummer]@Migrainesbythedozen was she there, in the class? [/quote]
@liveforsummer Of course her daughter was there in the class, that's why she was so upset.

liveforsummer · 02/03/2022 20:25

No I mean the parent who swears nothing was mentioned, after watching. But I think you knew that Hmm

Migrainesbythedozen · 02/03/2022 20:37

@liveforsummer

No I mean the parent who swears nothing was mentioned, after watching. But I think you knew that Hmm
@liveforsummer I didn't know that, I thought you meant the OP. Hmm The parent who said nothing happened is a TEACHER. I think she would know what happened better than your average parent. Hmm
Migrainesbythedozen · 02/03/2022 20:41

@TheMoth

It was interesting today to see how kids were reacting. Those who were fairly clued up and up for sensible discussion. We did a blanket, factual talk with all groups in form time, to ensure all kids got the same information, regardless of what they already knew. Conversely, ds' school did fuck all, so it's a good job I'd already armed him against the bollocks no doubt spouted on the yard.

Those who had heard snippets or done some tiktok scrolling were the ones coming out with 'I this ww3?' And 'will I get called up?'

So yes, talk to your kids. Explain to them so they DON'T become hysterical.

@liveforsummer This post was only about 5 posts before your reply to me and you didn't read it. Hmm
liveforsummer · 02/03/2022 20:47

Yes she's a teacher but a teacher in another school or at least class presumably? As a teacher she'd know DC's account of things aren't always factual. I had a mum today furious because her dc had been forced to change an item of clothing for his school photo yesterday. The reality was his friend had changed it and he did the same when offered out of choice.

liveforsummer · 02/03/2022 20:48

Actually having re read that the sons school didn't even show them newsround so your point is totally irrelevant