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AIBU?

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Original poster

School letting 8 year old watch newsround

421 replies

rhonyvsrhobh · 24/02/2022 20:06

I think that it is important for children to know what is happening in the world - to an extent.

My 8 year old, primary 4 daughter came home today very upset and worried as she had seen on Newsround which is shown at her school that Russia have invaded Ukraine. She has asked me several times if we were going to get 'hit'. I have tried to reassure her that it won't happen (what else can I say) and not to worry. She then asked me to swear on her life that we won't be affected by it. I said I couldn't swear on her life but not to worry, it won't happen.

She is very anxious and I just don't think something so serious should have been shown to 8 year old children. I feel so sorry for them, they've had covid and now this!

AIBU to contact the school about this or am I being precious?

OP posts:
7eleven · 26/02/2022 16:05

@Cbtb in any of the circumstances you describe, I would have already discussed it with the family and have a plan in place. I’m talking about settling a child who may have become very worried. I stand by that. I don’t think 8 year olds generally need to be thinking about this too much, in the UK.

dottydodah · 26/02/2022 16:06

I would try to reassure her . Tell her that No One can be sure about anything at all .All we as Mummies and Daddies /Teachers and so on can do is our very best to keep them safe . Ukraine is a very long way from UK (nearly 2000 miles) .Maybe show her on a map . The Govt have said they are not sending Troops in . Maybe say to think of the children there in her prayers .

saraclara · 26/02/2022 16:11

@7eleven

Haven’t read the whole thread, but when I taught that age group I would have discussed with the parents before bringing the subject up. It’s so serious and scary. I’d want to respect the parents’ wishes about how much they wanted their child to be exposed to.
There simply isn't time to do a full consultation of all parents when an event like this happens. Children are at their most anxious when they first hear this news. You can't wait for a week until you've heard from every parent. And what are you going to do if 50% of parents consulted want you to do one thing, and 50% the other?

Teachers have to react then and there when dreadful news comes out. And the safest way to respond is through a medium such as Newsround, which they can rely on, and which gives them a start on how to answer the children's questions.

Cbtb · 26/02/2022 16:14

I see I misread sorry.

However I wouldn’t use naughty. Naughty is when you backchat your parents or knock down your siblings lego. Children are often naughty and that’s fine. We explain why what they have done is wrong and move on. It does not make them evil.

War is bad and evil, so is murder and rape and child abuse. It’s not on a spectrum of naughty behaviour. Kids need to know that being naughty sometimes doesn't make them evil but human. Children already see the world in black and white, and I worry that we expect too much perfection from them. Children that are anxious at the smallest mistake because it’s never ok to mess up as all sins are as bad as each other. We need to teach them that nuance.

If children today think being naughty leads to the death of innocents no wonder they are all so anxious.

OchreDandelion · 26/02/2022 16:17

I would have already discussed it with the family and have a plan in place.

It happened very quickly overnight on Wednesday. The discussion in this thread is about showing Newsround on Thursday.

When in the build up would you have had the conversation? Or do you talk to all families in detail about where their extended family are and what their extended family do for jobs? That is not a policy or process I have heard before. Are parents happy to disclose that level of detail? If not, how would you have the conversation in advance?

I had some children totally take me by surprise this week. e.g. a child I knew of as Tanzanian-Filipino, turned out to have a Ukrainian grandad. (who is luckily working in Qatar which I did know).

7eleven · 26/02/2022 16:19

@saraclara I’m not talking about a 7 page questionnaire Smile. I would chat at the school gate. You’re right though, it could come up quite quickly, but then I’d be reassuring, acknowledge concern and move on. Any child who seemed ever so worried, I’d mention it to their parent at the end of the day.

7eleven · 26/02/2022 16:22

Jeez Louise guys. Back off with your freaking over the top responses to this. I couldn't actually give a flying fuck what you think of how I’d handle it, so won’t be justifying myself.

Cbtb · 26/02/2022 16:22

I was a primary aged child when the IRA blew up my town centre (and I can’t be the only one on here who has this experience). My school and parents dealt with it well, and didn’t pretend it was nothing but “far away naughtyness” . That would not have been reassuring because it wasn’t far away and calling it naughty wojld have made me worried I might get blown up for forgetting my homework or something. Treating it as the serious issue it is, talking about it and then moving on, demonstrating resilience and the benefits of doing something practical for the anxiety rather than platitudes and pretending the problem dosent exist are much preferable

7eleven · 26/02/2022 16:26

@cbtb if you can’t see the difference between a bomb in your own town and a conflict 2000 miles away that we’re not militarily involved with then I think you need to get a grip.

Sceptre86 · 26/02/2022 16:27

Precious, she's 8 not a baby. My 4 year old saw it on the news and has been asking questions. I've answered him in an age appropriate way. Maybe you should do the same? Them change the subject and distract her.

ChocolateRiver · 26/02/2022 16:31

I think showing news round was actually quite sensible. It’s aimed at this age group and explains things in a very child friendly way. The children will have lots of questions and this a good way to address some of them without the teacher being accused of having a biased opinion or saying the wrong thing.

BabyTurtIe · 26/02/2022 16:42

They watch it at my kids school

Cbtb · 26/02/2022 17:29

I mentioned the IRA because many parents on here must be about the same age, 1980s kids, our childhood was full of war -cold war, the falklands, NI and then the bombings of the UK, many NI posters of the same age grew up in a war zone. I had older schoolmates killed in Afghanistan when in secondary school who signed up at 18. We have been at war or involved in conflict for most of our adult lives and so discussing war shouldn't be some big . So many fb posts and upset social media -"omg how do i explain this horrid thing to my kids?" "why are their childhoods being stolen" "chgildren these days are exposed to. so much" I cant believe this is happening" We deal with it the same way our parents did for us and their parents did for them.

This doesn't mean its not a big deal but pretending that this isnt something that happens to people like us where we live is pointless. Its not stealing childhoods to mention it. War may come to our country again soon, I hope it doesn't. We shouldn't tell children not to be scared when they are scared of something scary and then pretend its not happening - that creates anxiety. Telling them "don't worry its far away" isnt going to reasure its just going to stop them asking questions. Admit the fear, take any practical steps to make things better you can and then get on with life.

pollyanna1962 · 26/02/2022 18:01

Crikey Newsround is for children, I watched it as a child. We cant hide the world from our children, yes they may be upset or worried but the world is nasty and one they must face. You cant wrap them up in cotton wool and then given them an almighty shock in senior school. I know it was far from ideal but my mothers generation lived through the 2nd world war in their home cities and most grew old non the worse for it.

TheMarmaladeYears · 26/02/2022 18:02

I was a 9 year old during the Cuban missile crisis and remember just how unsettling it was to have the news mostly kept from me while my mother uttered platitudes of the 'faraway place, won't affect us here' variety. I was much more worried about the situation precisely because it was obvious I wasn't being told the truth. So I question whether keeping a child in ignorance does more than increase the potential for anxiety.

I wish we'd had such a good source of age-appropriate information as Newsround. However, it's your job as a parent to interpret current affairs for your child and be prepared to answer their questions honestly in a way you know they can take on board. Having a think about how you'll discuss the situation in Ukraine is a more productive way forwards than a complaint to the school.

Bezziebabe · 26/02/2022 18:25

All schools watch news round as it is telling them the news in an age appropriate way. I'd much rather they watch that and have a teacher watch it with them that me have to struggle with the best way to tell them about it. Why shouldn't they know? You're being very precious.

mamabear715 · 27/02/2022 07:03

I asked my youngest (left school now) what he thought of this.
He was wide eyed and wondered why teachers were putting the tv on at all and not TEACHING! ;-)
Fair point, I'd have thought! ;-)

liveforsummer · 27/02/2022 07:25

@mamabear715

I asked my youngest (left school now) what he thought of this. He was wide eyed and wondered why teachers were putting the tv on at all and not TEACHING! ;-) Fair point, I'd have thought! ;-)
Nonsense - even in the 80's it wasn't an unfamiliar sight to have the tv on a trolley wheeled in to your class to watch something. These days there is a smart board in every class
GrannyRose15 · 27/02/2022 09:19

You are not being ridiculous at all to want to protect your child from this. Discuss it with the school.

GrannyRose15 · 27/02/2022 09:28

@Badunkadunk

I don’t think you’re being unreasonable or precious. The news is a constant barrage of fear-porn (if it bleeds it leads) and when I heard them talking about vaccinating kids on newsround (recommended viewing during homeschooling) I told the girls to turn it off. We turned the news off in July 2020 when our then 10yo burst into tears with the announcement of yet another covid restriction. My advice to anyone who wants to retain some perspective in life and keep their mental health in tact would be to turn the news off and reduce their social media consumption. And that’s before we even touch upon BBC bias and propaganda. Yes, even on CBBC; anyone remember the 190-odd genders? Or the MSM journalists that uncritically disseminated the fake videos from China of people dropping dead in the street? They, bluetick journalists, didn’t even verify the sources. If you want your kids to be informed there are more measured and critical sources than the MSM.
Wish I'd put it like that. Children are exposed to irrational fear far too much these days. It's no wonder we are so anxious as a nation.
Lion21 · 27/02/2022 09:34

Precious. Kids need to have a bit of an understanding of what is happening in the world. I can’t imagine how those parents and children in the Ukraine are feeling!

Cbtb · 27/02/2022 10:19

“I heard them talking about vaccinating kids on newsround (recommended viewing during homeschooling) I told the girls to turn it off. “

Why would you do this? Your children will need quite a few vaccines in their lives. Thankfully we live in a country with a robust preventative health system with universal vaccine provision. This is something to be celebrated. Don’t make your kids fear needles. Matter of fact - yes it hurts a little, but you have had loads since you were a baby, it will stop you getting sick and we will do something fun after.

OchreDandelion · 27/02/2022 18:42

In case anyone is interested, the DfE has now issued guidance to teachers.

educationhub.blog.gov.uk/2022/02/25/help-for-teachers-and-families-to-talk-to-pupils-about-russias-invasion-of-ukraine-and-how-to-help-them-avoid-misinformation/

saraclara · 27/02/2022 18:52

[quote OchreDandelion]In case anyone is interested, the DfE has now issued guidance to teachers.

educationhub.blog.gov.uk/2022/02/25/help-for-teachers-and-families-to-talk-to-pupils-about-russias-invasion-of-ukraine-and-how-to-help-them-avoid-misinformation/[/quote]
Well that's a bit rubbish. It looks like a C&P from guidance about talking about racist groups. It has no message at all about how to help anxious children who are worried about war.

Abraxan · 27/02/2022 19:21

@mamabear715

I asked my youngest (left school now) what he thought of this. He was wide eyed and wondered why teachers were putting the tv on at all and not TEACHING! ;-) Fair point, I'd have thought! ;-)
Why does your son believe that learning about current affairs, from a range of sources, isn't part of teaching and learning?

I'd be incredibly surprised that he has gotten through his full education without his teachers discussing a wide range of topics, including news issues, and without using a range of sources including age appropriate TV presentations/shows.