Y5 taught about child prostitution

[ShiteheadRevisited]

Help me get some perspective.

DD(9) told me last night that as part of their class learning about children's rights in R.E. yesterday, that "there was a really sad one" about "adults who make children have sex for money!"

She looked very shocked and upset telling me. Their teacher (very experienced with older daughter herself) apparently said that "you should all know what sex is" and that "this (adults making children have sex) is really, really horrible" and then moved on.

They have not covered human reproduction yet, and school's curriculum states that sex ed will occur in Y6, with a letter going home to parents beforehand (it's a small independently primary).

Our daughter knows about human reproduction/birds & bees etc but not sex for pleasure or anything else yet.

I don't consider myself a prude but am feeling very out of touch and actually quite emotional that a piece of childhood innocence has been taken from her.

AIBU to feel this way? I honestly don't know whether I'm being a bit of a pearl-clutcher and that this is normal content for primary schools nowadays, or if I have a right to feel pissed off??

@ShiteheadRevisited

Thanks all for your responses. No, the teacher didn't use the term "child prostitution" - that's my own clumsy vocabulary and I realise now that this term is wrong (told you, I'm a dinosaur!).

She did (apparently) say the words "sometimes adults have sex with children for money".

I will have a chat with her to find out the context and her version of events, and then possibly raise it further with headteacher.

Thanks again for you comments, they've really helped.

Yes. You should raise it with the head. Children her age shouldn’t be taught about sex yet, as you’ve mentioned their curriculum states. Really not ok. You said ‘there was this really sad one’ - are you referring to a video? If so, the teacher should have watched the whole video before to check it was appropriate

'You should all know what sex is' - what sort of teacher makes that assumption about 9 year olds?? and to tell them that they should all know - as if they've done something wrong if they don't know - is just appalling IMO. And then to brush over 'adults making children have sex' like that with a 'really, really horrible' but that's the end of it is just shocking. Were they watching a video? It obviously wasn't age appropriate. This is such a sensitive subject and really, really shouldn't have been handled in this way. It's obviously really affected your daughter negatively, teachers should not be frightening children like this, it could really affect the MH of an anxious child. You really need to contact the school about it and get them to now cover this in a much better way.

@CarbonelCat

"I would expect a nine year old to know what sex is, and what a prostitute is."

Really? Really?

My dc have all known about sex for reproduction as a matter of course - no big reveal or discussion but the conversations around healthy relationships, consent, sex for pleasure etc have only really happened with mine since end of primary and they certainly haven't got as far as transactional sex or organised sexual exploitation. Why on earth would they?

How can children possibly be expected to understand these topics and the amount of nuanced discussion around them (why should they) so all that happens when you tell 9 yr olds about CSE is that they feel less safe, more scared and potentially being their lifelong learning about sex and relationships with the sense that sex is exploitative, done to them, not based on consent and something to dread.

I can't see that you're basing this on real life knowledge and experience of 9 year olds really?

Completely agree with this, among other factors, Im of the opinion that childrens MH has deteriorated and anxiety increased in children partly due to adults insistence that we talk to them about a number of adult worries, grooming, climate change, CSE, gangs, drugs etc etc in an effort to educate, empower and inform but what inadvertently we are also doing is raising their anxieties. I find it sad when children are so au fait with a number of professional phrases and terminology like grooming and self harm etc. I worry that the trend in recent years, probably over the past 10 years to include and explore children's opinions, give them a say also may have increased a disproportionate level of responsibility onto their shoulders, without meaning to obviously. Children do need to be informed and heard but Im not sure we are going the right way about it.

completely agree with Opal4
Hasselhoffsheadband - if you RTFT, OP states "No, the teacher didn't use the term "child prostitution" "

I find it sad when children are so au fait with a number of professional phrases and terminology like grooming and self harm etc.
Really? - I rejoice that that they are not in ignorance so that in the event they are abused, they have the knowledge and confidence to tell someone and stop it happening.
All that these hushed tones of secrecy and keeping the subject taboo achieve is to create a safe haven for abusers.

@ThinWomansBrain

completely agree with Opal4 Hasselhoffsheadband - if you RTFT, OP states "No, the teacher didn't use the term "child prostitution" "

Yes I know, I did RTFT. The teacher said 'making children have sex for money'. And as I said upthread, most 9 years only have an abstract concept of what 'sex' is and so wouldn't understand 'sex for money' and how it is abusive.

This is entirely different to teaching kids about reducing risk via something like the NSPCC Pants campaign.

@ThinWomansBrain

I find it sad when children are so au fait with a number of professional phrases and terminology like grooming and self harm etc. Really? - I rejoice that that they are not in ignorance so that in the event they are abused, they have the knowledge and confidence to tell someone and stop it happening. All that these hushed tones of secrecy and keeping the subject taboo achieve is to create a safe haven for abusers.

I not sure where I said that issues should be kept secret or taboo or children kept in ignorance, its about the level and how you do it. Children using almost professional terminology on a regular basis tells me that we are going about it the wrong way.