To not know what to do about this gift from a friend?

[Starryskiesinthesky]

A friend sent me a cookbook as a present but when it arrived it was a secondhand library book and a bit grotty! I am fairly sure she didnt mean it to be like this but she has asked me about it and is coming round for dinner and so I dont know what to do. I thought about ditching it and buying a new version so that she wouldnt be embarrassed, or I could just not let her see it and make little reference to it (but that might seem rude!) or do I tell her? Help! What would you do?!

Do absolutely nothing. I buy second hand books online all the time. She was probably being savvy and you're being dramatic

There is nothing wrong with second hand books but this is fairly grotty! I would never knowingly send a book like this as a present and I am 100% sure my friend didnt know this when she bought me it. She either thought she was buying it new or in good condition.

There is nothing dramatic about it although my son has told me I am being a snob for not wanting a second hand library cook book with bits of food in it.

I’ve bought people second hand books occasionally (e.g. if it’s a specific one I couldn’t get any other way) but I’d always acknowledge the fact, and ask if it was ok when it arrived, so it’s a bit odd if your friend hasn’t done that. Still, it’s only a book. If you don’t want it replace it or get rid.

I would show her and have a proper giggle with her about how cheeky someone has been to sell a library book!! Make it fun, then it isn’t embarrassing or awkward, it’s something you’ll have a laugh about for years to come!

This wouldn't bother me in the slightest. I think sometimes people on MN never have to deal with anything truly difficult in life judging by the issues raised.

@Starryskiesinthesky

Yes it was ordered online and delivered direct to us. I am fairly sure she thought it was new, or at least a good second hand copy, but it is the fact that it still has the library code on the spine and has that horrible plastic cover that has gone old. The pages have cooking splashes on as well!

I wouldnt say anything and would just put it to charity if it wasnt for the fact that she is coming round and I know will look out for it!

Please don't put it to charity, we don't want old books covered with manky food.

For anyone who gives a flying fig I took the manky old cover off, picked the library labels off and used wipes to wipe off the manky food. It actually looks fine now and my friend didnt really notice it had been a library book!

I am laughing @slashlover - you are quite right

This can’t be real as an actual problem. If it is, OP’s friend probably got it secondhand for eco reasons (rightly) and/or she’s not feeling too flush at the moment. Still wanted to be kind and to give a present though.