AIBU to be angry with my sister?

[sparklynailpolish]

I'm 33 and have always been pretty close with my 29 year old sister.

In September last year I started having seizures with no previous history of them. I told her about it and she said that it was probably due to stress and I should slow down a bit. I had some further tests and it was a small brain bleed.

In December I picked up a completely different infection and was taken to hospital in an ambulance after collapsing at home. While in hospital I was tested for Covid and that came up positive as well. My OH text my sister to let her know I was in hospital and in a bad way but she didn't reply.

On the 4th of January after a few days completely out of it, I text her to say I was feeling a bit better. She replied "sorry, is this meant to be something else unrelated to the brain bleed?". I said yes, it was an infection and I also had Covid and she just replied "right". I definitely found her a bit frosty and I text her when I got home from the hospital but she didn't reply.

It's now been almost 7 weeks since I heard from her at all. I messaged a couple of weeks ago asking if everything is ok and she ignored that too. Before this we spoke most days.

I have noticed that anytime I post anything on Instagram stories she's viewed them within about 3 minutes but she doesn't interact with me.

I've gone from being disappointed in her to actually quite angry that she won't engage at all. AIBU?

I once knew a women who was always "ill" and her "health problems" were all fabricated and exaggerated for what I can only imagine was drama and attention. I cut her out as it was seriously weird and fucked up. She couldn't see what was going on. I think she had munchausen syndrome or whatever it is called now and she really believed all this was happening.

I actually think you are best off going round there and getting eyeball to eyeball and having a proper chat.

It could be anything (from terror you will die to her being a covert psychopath with zero empathy who you are better off without) but something is def up.

@Totalwasteofpaper

I actually think you are best off going round there and getting eyeball to eyeball and having a proper chat.

It could be anything (from terror you will die to her being a covert psychopath with zero empathy who you are better off without) but something is def up.

I agree with this! You need to see her in person!

She sounds like my sister and my sister is a f*ing bitch.

Did she definitely see OH's message as she seemed clueless when you messaged her?

I would be worried. Does she have a husband/partner you could contact?

Depends on what your relationship beforehand was like.

My sister has always been a victim (of her own doing I may add) and still thinks like this.

I stepped bak because it was always me who got called when she was stressed etc and I was always available.

When I was really I'll and had emergency surgery she was nowhere to be seen and still isn't.

If I didn't contact her she wouldn't bother so I stopped.

Her dc had covid and I messaged every day and offered to do shopping etc. my dc got it and I never even heard from her and yes she knew they had it.

@Etinoxaurus

Armchair psychology incoming... Your mum died young, and she’s in denial/ petrified/ catastrophising.

I did wonder your before even knowing about your Mom. Like she's withdrawing in case you leave her thinking it'll hurt her less

Even if she is scared of losing OP it's a very odd reaction from her.

Hmm I would definitely read her messages as saying she doesn’t believe you, at least about the later illnesses.

I am not sure why she would disbelieve you though. Is what you’re posting on Instagram inconsistent with being ill? (Eg big days out with DD) Otherwise, I can’t think why she would doubt it.

I can't imagine sitting there wondering for 7 weeks while this passive aggressive bollocks continued, supposedly out of the blue, from someone I was close to.

Go round.

I agree it is odd behaviour.

I do think that she is scared. If you and your Dd are her only family, she is probably getting a hoof of mortality. A brain bleed is not insignificant and she may just be terrified that any subsequent ailment may make you worse.

Her behaviour is strange - make no mistake - but it is more likely to be borne of fear than hate.

Get round there OP. And all the best going forward

This sounds like anger or resentment, not fear

She sounds angry or let down. Does she have her own kids? Could something have happened and she doesn't feel able to burden you?

Health anxiety potentially. That can really make people act out of character

Sounds like she's scared of losing you too.