for getting fed up with people shutting down debate...

[SueBaroo]

... because they are offended?

It seems to be some unspoken rule nowadays that if someone doesn't agree with what is being said, instead of actually defending their position, they can just whine a bit about their feelings and guilt everyone into backing off?

It doesn't always work (especially on MN, with the high-proportion of marvellously ball-breaking opinionated folk) but it's a cheap trick and it winds me up. AIBU for wanting to tell people who try it to buck up? Should I be more squishy about feeeeeelings?

i athink we all say things on here that we wouldnt in real life. I moan about things that i wouldnt even bother to open my mouth about. I also talk about serious problems in my life. I have however, learnt to be very choosy where i post things. If it is something i feel upset over, unless i feel the world in his wife will come through with a resounding YANBU i definately dont post on this part of the board.

I do worry sometimes that people take my inarticulate replies as personal attacks, but for the record, i love you all and if that seems too personal - tough

Yes personal attacks are out of order. Opinions are not. Also, loads of people jumping on someone for an opinion. Rahter than letting it lie and moving on, everyone wants a piece of the action.

AND something mentioned on another thread recently, fisking.
If you are going to take someones post and answer every part of it by breaking it down, fair enough, but do not ignore the whole tone and point of the post by doing it, or what's the bloody point??????

i know what you mean lazarou, but i think to an extent that is the nature of the beast. I tend to respond to OPs and then realise that what i have said has already been said twenty times already - i could resolve, i guess, to read a few of the most recent posts before spouting off, yep new years resolution 564! You do of course realise that NYR no one was too stay away from mumsnet until my house was clean

I actually shut the computer down earlier (a rare event) so that i could do other things, but then ds2 turned it back on. It must be a sign to keep on posting, obviously.

agree op, wt
i do think alot of it is not reading properly all the thread, and worse,not stating this at the start
vs the tone and context is sooo important too i second that
i get annoyed when posts are clearly not being read
what is the point then??

Oh and it really annoys me when someone copies and pastes a part of someone elses post and pulls them up on it in a horribly smug fashion.

By lazarou on Wed 02-Jan-08 11:26:43
Yes personal attacks are out of order. Opinions are not. Also, loads of people jumping on someone for an opinion. Rahter than letting it lie and moving on, everyone wants a piece of the action.

I think you mean rather

People picking up on typos, really shows a side to someone IMO.

I couldn't find any grammatical errors to pull her up on

but people are even using the personal attacks not being appropriate as a defence. Read a thread yesterday where someone was robustly disagreeing with the OP - whereupon OP said "glad you're not my counsellor " and was accused of making a personal attack on the dissenter

By lazarou on Wed 02-Jan-08 11:26:43
Yes personal attacks are out of order.

technically there should be a comma after Yes...

Yes, personal attacks are out of order.

well I think this thread is wrong and I want you all to obey me ....
___

SueB, I do agree with you (sorry for the pissing about ) - there do seem to be some incredibly over-sensitive people out there sometimes!

lapin, you bloody bugger

and you bahkew, i'm actually crying now...

Well there wasn't any need for the red face emoticon .

I don't know, it's not like the old days, I think it's time for me to leave MN

Had similar with a builder. He just could not take being told he'd done something wrong or not as we wanted. He'd say we couldn't argue with him, because the stress would give him cancer and he'd die.

Twunt.

pmsl at builder with delicate feelings...

oops must change name back

testing testing...

where's my profile gone, bugger...

Everyone resorts to the 'playground bully' insult if they think a poster is not agreeing with them. It is a bit pathetic.

i dont like shutting debate down and i feel that we can do both - bare in mnd someones feelings and also have debate

whilst someone might be fuked off becuase they weaned their baby at 3 hours and nothing happened to them and how dare you tell me that my parenting is wrong and blah de fucking blah and now i am in tears and i'm leaving

one could reply, i am sorry you are feeling that way and i cannot comment on your personal situation howver i feel that ater i have read the relevent infomration posted int he links that for my child i would rather wait until he is 73"

its when one apportions blame or apportions blame by default and we end up with two agressors.

I think that sometimes people are so convinced of their rightness, that they cannot actually believe that anyone would disagree, and it just does not compute.. hence the wailing and gnashing of teeth ....