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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask for your help with creepy guy at work

51 replies

Bitcreepy · 11/02/2022 10:01

There is a man at my work. I know through other people that he has been through a break up recently and is now really lonely.

English is not his first language and he is older (late fifties / early sixties) and I find it difficult to communicate with him effectively.

He has made some comments which are quite creepy. There is a young woman (20yo) at work who he has approached and said he wants a girlfriend and he likes young, black girls - she has Indian heritage. He has asked where she is when she is off and when I've said she's visiting her boyfriend he has started saying what a shit town he lives in etc.

He has now started coming up to me and calling me sweet, beautiful etc in his own language, which I understand a little of. I'm quite new there and I laughed it off. There is a lot of joking and silly banter at my work, so it didn't seem that weird and I also made the classic mistake of feeling a bit sorry for him Hmm.

Anyway, he really made me uncomfortable last week when I was working and he sidled up beside me and said quietly into my ear "I like you" in English. I sort of froze and pretended I didn't hear it. Yes, I'm an idiot.

Anyway, I have to work in the same area as him again next week. I'm thinking that if he starts all the "sweet, beautiful woman" crap i just say "can you stop that please? You are making me uncomfortable".

I am moving on soon and he actually isn't the only creepy male staff member, which is one of the many reasons I'm moving on after only a few months. Do I report him to HR or is that massively over dramatic? I have an exit interview as well, so I may just mention it in a general way there. But I'm also tempted to ask the extremely lovely HR Adviser to keep an eye out by email today.

Mentioned it to my husband who was equally weirded out by the "I like you", but mentioned it to an older woman at work who said "ah bless him".

Thoughts?

OP posts:
Luredbyapomegranate · 11/02/2022 13:31

Yes report it.

Because he'll be repeating it with other women who may not be able to assert themselves. He can't use women in the office as a balm for his loneliness.

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