Working school hours?

[Isntisironic1]

I currently work part time, not badly paid but my partner who is self employed earns 5x what I earn. I have been employed my the same company for over 10 years. Since having my youngest (and my partner going self employed) I put in a request for flexible working which was accepted. For the past 4 years I’ve worked school hours and there’s never been a problem however we got a new manager a couple of months ago who keeps trying to rota me onto lates/earlies etc after I’ve already explained that I am unable to do these hours. She did it again yesterday for next months rota so I again mentioned that I would be unable to work the shifts due to lack of childcare etc and she’s basically said work the shifts or find alternative employment. Can she do this?
I’ve tried to go to hr but they have told me the best course of action is to come to an agreement between ourselves

[quote DragonMovie]@Isntisironic1

I find some peoples responses to you on here shameful. You don’t have to justify your choices - you found an arrangement that suits you and your family and is good for your finances, your workplace agreed and now they’re being unfair.

Are the other posters jealous that you came up with an arrangement they didn’t think of?? I literally cannot understand the motive for people questioning your childcare arrangements… It doesn’t matter what “millions of others” pay for/do with their kids - it’s simply not the matter at hand!![/quote]
Being forced to only work part time because the father of her children won’t pay for childcare despite earning thousands of £££ a week isn’t a choice though is it? This is a person who is in effect being financially controlled which, as they are not married, could have a devastating impact on her should they split up. She can’t earn enough to pay into a decent pension. His could be worth a fortune but she will have no right to it if they split up. She won’t have amassed any significant savings whilst working part time. If all his savings are in his name then once again should they split she will get nothing.
That is not a situation any mother should find themselves in, and is certainly nothing to be jealous of.

@KindergartenKop

If you divorce DH then you can split childcare 50/50 and work the days you don't have the kids.

They aren’t married.

@NettleTea

It IS the bigger issue because OP doesnt seem to realise how vulnerable she is, as with far too many women on this board at the moment.

OP I hope you are on the mortgage / deeds.

I hope he has made a will that you are named in

But it's not what she's asking advice about, is it?

I think we’ve gone a bit off topic, my partner has no pension he is self employed, we have joint properties that we rent out that will enable us to ‘retire’. We are both named on the mortgage and I am sole beneficiary in his will. Yes on paper it probably looks like he’s being an arse but he pays for everything. The money I earn is mine to spend as I please (although it mainly goes on the kids) so this is not the issue here

@Soontobe60 I posted that before the OP updated that the husband won’t pay for childcare.

Even so, I have to say I do find it really patronising when someone comes on MN to ask a specific question and people take the opportunity to try and educate them on other areas of their life.

The won’t pay for childcare thing is not what the OP is asking about… this thread has been derailed from the moment someone said “why can’t you pay for childcare like millions of others” which comes across as goady and irrelevant.

Her question is: can her company renege on their 4 year old agreement. No they can’t.

[quote Isntisironic1]@Soontobe60 unfortunately my partner would rather I give up my career and be a stay at home mum which is something I don’t want to do, he will therefor not help with childcare costs[/quote]
They are his costs, too; you have a right to a fulfilling life of your own, and for you, that involves keeping some independence and your job.

This is not on, and you need to explain that very clearly to him. Tell the chances of divorce would be A LOT higher if you weren't working, as you would be miserable and feel very insecure.