No direct Wedding Invite for husband

[Aitanacama]

Just wondering about wedding invite etiquette …my brother is getting married in June, he has invited me and my family (hubby and two kids) we live abroad (Europe) so not far. Yesterday was discussing with hubby the logistics and he basically threw a major tantrum and said if my brother didn’t invite him directly as in call him personally about the wedding, then he isn’t going and neither are the kids. That basically it’s rude that my brother hasn’t spoken to him directly and expects him to buy tickets and fly over. Am I missing something ? Because I think it’s pretty ridiculous, since he is invited by both my sis in law and brother, they have made plans for four of us, does he actually need to be told personally? For a little back story, my brother and husband don’t talk much, just polite, there’s literally a 20 year age gap so they don’t have much in common, and my brother is pretty anti-social. We live abroad the interaction is limited to when he or we visit, which we haven’t in the last two years. Tell me because I’m seething and ready to curse my husband all the way out.

We had similar with our wedding. We hadn’t known when we did the invitations that someone had got married and their father phoned my mother in law shouting, demanding that they got a separate invite. No idea why they hadn’t spoken to us about it as I’d seen the mother the day before the phone call and she’d said nothing. They then told 4 other families not to come because of it. Long term it affected our relationship with them badly. We didn’t have any contact with all of them after. Life’s too short your husband needs to get over himself (& think about what behaviour example he’s setting for his children) and put a smile on and just go.

You don’t normally send invitations out until 6 weeks before, that’s normal etiquette.

He sounds so tedious.

Well done for telling him you and the children are going.

Sounds like you will have a better time without him.

Please can we know which culture this is, so that we can all avoid or anticipate similar hoo ha? Or increase our knowledge / awareness?

Anyway, tell him he is being invited to a UK wedding by a UK family, a close relative, so he needs to go with the cultural flow of the invitation and stop being such a knob.