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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

If your neighbours dog was incessantly barking, what would help?

88 replies

Awkwardusername · 05/02/2022 10:52

Obviously it’s annoying, and a total pain for everyone involved, but our 10 month old dog will not shut up at night!

She’s doing it for attention and everything we’ve read basically says ignore it, which we’re trying, but we’re really worried about the neighbours! We only moved in a few months ago and although they’re all friendly etc, they’re all a lot older than us.

We have spoken to them a few times apologising but last night, the dog was on another level!

Is there anything that might help/pacify them a little?

(Please don’t lecture me about the dog by the way, we’re trying our best, and usually if it gets really bad my partner will go downstairs and sleep on the sofa with her but we need to get her back in the habit of sleeping in her crate by herself!)

OP posts:

CaptainCabinets · 05/02/2022 20:27

Probably because she’s in season, they get SO needy! Can you bring her crate upstairs so she can hear and smell you for reassurance? My boy attacks our feet in the night if he has a bad dream and gets woken by movement (frequently, he’s a rescue) so he’s now crated in our room. He takes himself to bed with his blankie and wakes us to bring him in for a morning cuddle 😄

StoneofDestiny · 05/02/2022 20:32

Oh Lord - your poor neighbours

canihaveacoffeeplease · 05/02/2022 21:54

We were that neighbour. We moved house it was so bad.

OnTheBoardwalk · 05/02/2022 22:03

@thereisonlyoneofme

My dog starts getting excited at exactly 7.15 every morning. No idea what starts it as heating goes on at 6.30, no one next door goes out to work or makes a noise ! I end up getting up and she starts barking while I am getting my slippers and robe on and trying to get downstairs before she annoys the neighbours. I know 7.15 isnt particularly early unless its the weekend, havent been able to stop this. Its not needing a either.

So next door are still asleep making no noise and you let your dog start yapping every morning at 7.15? Are you my annoying neighbour?

Train your dog to not yap at you putting your slippers and robe on. Any sort of yapping in the bedroom will most likely be annoying your poor neighbours

StrongTea · 05/02/2022 22:14

Have you tried covering the crate with a blanket?

Wolfiefan · 05/02/2022 22:18

You’ve had crappy advice OP. Don’t leave a dog to bark in its crate. You won’t be teaching it to be happy in that space.

hopeishere · 05/02/2022 22:21

Abandon the crate. Best thing we did.

OnTheBoardwalk · 05/02/2022 22:22

@RealBecca

Genuine question as I've never had dogs. Why does she need a crate? Especially if she isnt having toileting accidents?

Another genuine question to dog owners with crates, do you lock the dog in the crate at night? I've not had dogs either

I know a friend that has an open, covered crate which the dog goes to for quiet time. No one is allowed near the crate but the dog is allowed to come and go as it pleases. They don’t have the dog in the bedrooms but it’s happy with that

Blossomtoes · 05/02/2022 22:27

Move the crate into your bedroom or just forget the crate altogether. Some dogs just don’t like them.

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 05/02/2022 22:56

Can I just say Awkward as someone who lives next to an annoying barky dog that does my fecking head in ........ thank you for addressing it .
And go round to your NDN and say "Yes I know my dog is a pain in the bum, but I am working on it , doing everything I can so please bear with me"

Hopefully you can get her back to her quieter self soon, .
Is she due to be spayed ?

Custardpudding · 05/02/2022 22:57

We didn’t crate but I know lots who do. But have him in the kitchen with a stair gate so it’s like one big crate. He will occasionally bark in the night and it stopped when we got a night light! I’m pleased we didn’t give in and let him upstairs.

CorsicaDreaming · 06/02/2022 08:08

@Awkwardusername - if she isn't barking until 5am, happy asleep until then, your hubby gets up and checks on her and let's her out for a wee at 2:30am every morning, she sleeps at the back of your house and your neighbours at front of theirs and they are saying to you they are fine and can barely hear her... then to my thinking everyone here is totally fine. Apart from you who are worrying unnecessarily.

Your dog is waking up at her natural doggy time and expecting her whole pack (you) to wake up and start the day with her as she's awake.

A 5am walk in mid summer can be so lovely. Best part of the day... February not so much (although our tiler told me he gets up and walks his greyhound at 5am everyday and loves the peace and the fact there are no other "silly b"ggers and their dogs about".

I would just not worry and maybe try getting up early and giving her a walk, or not. But it feels to me like it's you not everyone else who is suffering here.

user1471604848 · 06/02/2022 09:32

My neighbour's dog used to bark so much, that even when it wasn't barking, I could still "hear" the barking in my head. It was awful.
Luckily she didn't keep the dog, since she couldn't handle it.

Could you try a collar that stops them barking? (I don't have dogs, so don't know if they're cruel).

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 06/02/2022 09:36

@user1471604848

My neighbour's dog used to bark so much, that even when it wasn't barking, I could still "hear" the barking in my head. It was awful. Luckily she didn't keep the dog, since she couldn't handle it.

Could you try a collar that stops them barking? (I don't have dogs, so don't know if they're cruel).

They are incredibly cruel.

Dogs who bark when they're alone generally do so because they're terrified and scared - punishing them for vocalising that fear is really unhelpful.

Imagine if you were alone and frightened and every time you shouted for help, you got shocked in the throat or had air or citronella sprayed in your face? Would it make you any less frightened?

Collars will either shut the dog up (and make them shut down as they're too frightened to do anything in case they get punished) or force them into showing their distress in other ways - destruction, toileting on the floor etc.

The only way to cure separation anxiety is to work on it with a behaviourist.

HandWash · 06/02/2022 09:43

Surely the answer is to get up at 5am and see to the dog? Making it your problem rather than the neighbour's?

LakieLady · 06/02/2022 09:45

My last dog beat me into submission in the end.

I decided to try her crate in my bedroom in the hope that she'd finally shut the fuck up settle. It sort of worked.

She didn't bark, but just kept rattling the crate, pulling at it with her teeth and clawing at it. At some point in the small hours, on the 3rd night of next to no sleep, I gave in and opened it.

She was up on the bed within a few seconds, snuggled up next to me, and we both slept solidly for the rest of the night.

She turned out to be the most perfect bed dog, and she was small, even for a lakeland terrier, which are small to start with.They don't moult, so the bed doesn't get covered in hair.

She slept on my bed for the rest of her life. It's 15 months since I lost her, and I still sometimes wonder where she is when I wake in the night.

I can see this might not be an acceptable solution if you had a St Bernard or something though.

LakieLady · 06/02/2022 09:46

Damn, strikethrough fail.

MyGlassKeepsLeaking · 06/02/2022 09:46

Take her out of the crate? It clearly doesn't work to have her in there. Dogs are pack animals, and you all are her pack. She's lonely.

2022booklover · 06/02/2022 09:50

I had a dog who didn’t bark at all ever. But when she came into season (only twice before I had her neutered) she would whine. So it could definitely be that.

That said I’ve never crated my dogs (tried with my current - male, he cried so I just gave up and let him on the bed (he’s small though).

SoupDragon · 06/02/2022 09:55

Next door's dog is a barker. He barks at everything and anything (whilst my dog watches him silently through the fence). It is always annoying but knowing that they were trying to train him out of it did help with the annoyance although that seems to have stopped now and he barks without reproach.

Nothing seemed to work with him, they even had a trainer in to try and sort out. My dog has never been a barker but I had no input into that at all - he just isn't!

sixswans · 06/02/2022 10:18

She might be too young to be alone at night. dog bed in your room?

lljkk · 06/02/2022 10:23

Neighbour's dog stopped barking when he was crated, felt more secure in a crate (he lived in kennels until 1 yr old & he struggled without boundaries). Ditch the crate if your dog hates it.

MintyGreenDream · 06/02/2022 10:27

Put the crate in a room that isnt a party wall to your neighbours.

Wheelz46 · 06/02/2022 10:30

We crate trained our dog with the intention of moving him to just a bed but this didn't work out, he loves the crate and wouldn't sleep anywhere else, so please ignore the posts saying just ditch it, unless he absolutely hates it.

In terms of barking, mine did go through a phase of being on the noisy side, now we have a pet tracker attached to the collar which you can also set commands on which is connected to your phone. If he barked, we used the command quiet, it worked!

If you don't wish to have a pet tracker, you can get a pet cam where you can also speak to them through, that works a treat too.

Pinchofnom · 06/02/2022 10:32

Sorry OP but I think you either need to get rid of the crate or invest in a trainer asap.

We’ve been the victims of a neighbours noisy dog (outside barking) which kept our DC up throughout the wee hours. It did generate a fair bit of animosity between the neighbours so I’d recommend trying to get to a solution fast.

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