Sex with coworkers

[rahjama]

NC. Repost as I posted earlier under the wrong title and got no responses.

I work in hospitality. Think bar/pub/restaurant. I've worked at this particular place for 2 years. Ever since I started I thought it was odd, but really more so recently.

It is the complete norm in my workplace to sleep with each other. I am not joking. We are completely understaffed, think 10 people. Of these 10, a solid 7 of them sleep with each other.

I want to stress I do not, I have had a partner the entire time I've worked there. The other two I don't include is a gentleman about 60 who is absolutely besotted by his wife of 30+ years, and a woman in her 50/60s.

One example of how normalised this is, is one day I will be having a conversation with, let's call him Jack, about how he is planning a second baby with his girlfriend. The next day he came into work and was asking me "from a girls perspective" about Emma (fake name) from work and what she likes etc as in tips to chat her up.

OF COURSE I have asked him how he is with both of them - that is cheating wtf ?? And his response will be that he is going through it with his at home girlfriend, they're not really together, she is probably seeing someone else, etc.

Emma is another one who has a partner at home. I believe they're separated but still living together. She has been with Jack, "Olivia" (doesn't work here anymore) "Kayla", and "Gary"

"Kayla" has also been with "Dawn".

"Dawn" has been with the MANAGER "Pete" and "Pete" has also been with Olivia who doesn't work here anymore.

Jack has the girlfriend. Gary is engaged. Dawn is single. Kayla is single. Pete is single. Emma is single. So it's not all just people cheating on their partners. My point was that just everyone sleeps with each other and that had never been a thing at either of the other two hospitality workplaces I've worked at.

Ahhhhh just wanted to rant about how weird and fucked up it is at my workplace. And like I said the managers do it too so it's not like they can enforce a "no seeing your coworkers" rule.

It happens inside and outside the workplace - can walk into the kitchen or staff room and find two people kissing. They will obviously pull away as soon as you walk in but you know they've been doing it. Staff room door is sometimes locked and I know stuff has gone on in there because people tell each other!
Go out for drinks and people end up in each other's hotel rooms.

I will just add that everyone is between the ages 25-45. So not huge age gaps. Except for the two older ones I mentioned above

Just wanted to post to see if anyone else's hospitality or non hospitality workplace is as bad as that. These people aren't bad people and they are my friends - just super weird I thought

My youngest DD works in hospitality and hasn't had similar in her workplaces. I worked in a couple of call centers and it was like that. There was a lot of cheating when I worked in a bank. It's just the mix of the people.

Don't shit where you eat

Never shit on your own doorstep.

When I worked in a bar years ago it was quite rife, everyone was under 35 and mostly single, quite a few students etc. The manager had to keep track of who had slept together but since had fallen out so he didn’t accidentally have them working together on the same bar etc. I think it was a perfect storm of young people working closely together, then often having an end of shift drink in the early hours together, being around people drinking and having fun…etc etc.

I’ve mainly worked in office jobs since where there’s been a dalliance here or there but not like the bar. But then maybe people are better at hiding it! You never know what goes on behind closed doors.

Years ago I worked in a very young office and there was lots of socialising and drinking together and quite a few of the staff/colleagues shagging each other, often behind partners’ backs.
I ended up in a relationship with one of the guys there.
It was just that sort of office.

Worked in a Council department and it was pretty bad , especially when you would meet spouses at various times. But I believe it very common in police and medical staff .

I can already see this one getting picked up by the daily mail. 🤦‍♀️

FUCK THE DAILY MAIL

I worked somewhere like this a couple of years back (also hospitality). I didn't find crew doing it weird as such, but managers dating or even casually sleeping with crew was too weird for me, it really blurred the lines in the workplace. Also the way everyone spoke to one another, including how they spoke to me, would cross so many boundaries in normal workplaces. When I think about it now it was completely messed up, it was like our store was its own little bubble where rules didn't exist and everyone was their own boss.

Absolutely standard in the hospitality business. Nothing to be bothered about, except the cheating, which I personally wouldn't want to hear about. Most people meet their partners at work.

I worked in a huge Council building years ago, loads of staff were having affairs.

We worked flexitime so together with 2 1/2 hour lunches or flexi days/afternoons off, daytime trysts were easy. I bet their spouses never found out a thing.

Temped in an investment bank once and when shown around I was told lots of MBA's on this floor. Assumed it was qualifications but no it stood for 'married but available'

I've been sleeping my my coworker for 10 years, but we do have a baby and a house together so it's not rhat casual.

Never seen that in my life- maybe once and it was two people. I got married and had kids early though- so I probably gave off “not interested “ vibes while being covered in baby sick.

@Catflapkitkat

Temped in an investment bank once and when shown around I was told lots of MBA's on this floor. Assumed it was qualifications but no it stood for 'married but available'

Holy smokes, certainly a new openness so to speak

Ive worked somewhere like this too, its all good fun until it isnt but I just accepted it at the time and shagged a couple myself over the years!

Yep, I’ve heard similar stories from friends working across different industries- airline, holiday resort, cruis ships, care homes, and do on …

Hell , I’m guilty of this myself- I didn’t sleep around but I did meet my husband at work so technically I’ve also slept with my co worker 😂

Shove men and women together all day every day and eventually they'll start fucking.

Did someone say medical? You mean hospital doctors?? GPs are on their own seeing patients all day.

I used to work in a branch of a well known supermarket, where you are referred to as 'partners' cough Waitrose.

It was so incestuous it was unreal.

The night shift were all shagging each other, not on the supermarket grounds may I add but they were all at it nevertheless.

One guy dated a girl for three years from one department, decided he'd had enough and then dated a girl from his own department. The second girl had already dated his best friend from the department I worked in.

One guy was dating a girl he was managing, whilst shagging a girl from 'fresh' department.

One couple got together and had a baby.

One manager married another and they had a baby. The two couples mentioned above were friends. I've since found out that the guy from the unmarried couple, is now dating the (now divorced) woman,with the unmarried mum having run a mile a long time ago.

I had a boyfriend when I first worked there, and would laugh about the antics.

Cue about two years later I split up with that boyfriend and started dating my manager, we were together for about 2 years and for an undisclosed amount of time he was sleeping with another girl 🤦🏻‍♀️

And that was the over 20's age range. God knows what the younger lot were up to 😂

In my experience this is totally normal in hospitality. It's a weird sector to work in.

It's practically written into the contract in hospitality, just one of those things, largely because of the ages of the majority of staff. I wasn't aware of so much adultery when I worked in the industry though.

OP you are a character in a soap. In soaps most of the characters have been with most of the others at some point.

Plenty of people meet their partners at work. As for the hospitality industry being more 'hospitable' than most, it wasn't my experience when I worked in it, but then I probably just didn't indulge.

I used to work for a ferry company going between Ireland and Wales, you'd work a week on a week off, the amount of affairs and crew shagging each other was staggering, always in and out of each other's cabins. And we are talking hospitality crew AND officers, seamen, even the captain on a number of occasions. Then once their week on was finished, they'd happily hop shore side and away to their wives / husbands and children like nothing happened. It was like they were living double lives. I was there 6 years in total never heard of any of the affairs being uncovered, it was just too easy when they are away a week at a time with no chance of their partners being around.