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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think we will never be homeowners?

248 replies

GroundToAHalterNeck · 02/02/2022 13:55

House prices are completely out of my reach now. DH and I are low earners due to life circumstances, no family support and a SN child requiring high levels of care.

We currently rent our home. I’ve been looking at options to buy but even the cheapest home in the cheapest areas would require a substantial deposit. Help To Buy and other government schemes also require a huge deposit we are unlikely to ever be able to save whilst paying rent too.

I met a friend for coffee this morning and she was explaining how they’re planning to upsize and how she will make a huge profit on their current home. It made me wonder how on earth first time buyers with no financial help would get on the property ladder in current times?

Is anyone else in the same position?

OP posts:
Scianel · 02/02/2022 13:58

Could you put your name down for social housing? I appreciate that you may not be offered something for a long time, depending on where you're based, but at least if/when you do get a property you'll have more security.

GroundToAHalterNeck · 02/02/2022 13:59

We have been on the social housing list for almost a decade ; we are not priority and it’s very unlikely we will ever be offered social housing.

OP posts:
BertieQueen · 02/02/2022 14:03

Am exactly the same as you. Currently renting and will never be able to afford to get on the property ladder. Have no savings and will never inherit either.

It’s crazy how property prices have gone. Rent is ridiculously high.
I worry my child will never own a property either.

The mind boggles at how others manage it.
You are not aloneFlowers

Seeleyboo · 02/02/2022 14:03

I think the future looks grim for any first time buyer now. My daugher and her partner and 23 and 27 and are not particularly low earners but can't afford a deposit or to buy a house on a mortgage that they would be offered. Rent is outrageously expensive now too. My older son is 27 and on good wages but can only afford a room in a house. My youngest son is 24 and he was amazingly lucky to buy a flat on part buy scheme 2 years ago as he won some money. I feel for you OP. It's hard to be in the position you're in as i have been there. I do own now but was mid 40s before i could and had help with my deposit. Goodluck

Tdcp · 02/02/2022 14:06

Yeah we'll never own either. It's depressing because I'm paying £650 in rent in a tiny house but a mortgage on a bigger house in a better area is around £400 with a £15k deposit.

springblossom22 · 02/02/2022 14:07

DH and I are in the same position, low earners and zero savings. Hoping when our youngest (11 months) starts school we can really get our heads down and save but even then, the size of the deposit we'd need and the monthly payments for our mortgage (as we'd be well into our 30s by the time we might ever buy) makes me anxious.

Years ago mortgages were cheaper than renting, but now there seems to be little difference if you don't have a substantial deposit. A 3 bed semi-detached where we are, with a £25,000 deposit (which I think is a huge amount but clearly not) would cost us over £1,200 a month mortgage repayments for 35 years. Hoping to win the lottery 😂😂

BitcherOfBlakiven · 02/02/2022 14:09

My rent is 43% of my income, lone parent and live in a bog standard terrace, in the Midlands.

Recently had a S21, and the rental price for a similar sized house has risen so much that it will cost me 56% of my income.

I fucking despair.

boringbertha1 · 02/02/2022 14:09

I thought the same but I went to an independent mortgage advisor that is a free service provided by the (Scottish) government and found this not to be the case. There was a scheme I hadn't heard of that made it affordable for me as it was only a fraction of what I thought a deposit would need to be.

Might be worth checking if there's any similar service in your area just to get an idea of what might be possible.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 02/02/2022 14:11

It made me wonder how on earth first time buyers with no financial help would get on the property ladder in current times

It is very tough, but first time buyers on good salaries can do it, and people who live in moderately priced areas can do it. It may also take compromise, and many families would rather rent for life than buy a flat in a less affluent, and who is to say they aren't right?

However in your case I don't know that the current market is the problem. If you are likely to be low earners for life (for good reasons) then buying always would have been difficult, and you may genuinely be much better off renting. Houses can eat money in maintenance and repairs, and just the stress of this possibility would be quite draining.

YellowLemonz · 02/02/2022 14:11

I would speak to a mortgage advisor.
An independent one (they don't charge and get paid via the bank)
They can give you an idea of what you will need etc and help with different schemes.
They may surprise you.

QforCucumber · 02/02/2022 14:12

The big thing for us was doing it pre kids (I know that’s not feasible now) we also live in the North East, so our first house 5 years ago only needed a deposit of £8k at 5%.

If we were buying now with 2 kids and childcare we’d not be able to do it at all so I totally feel for you it’s so awful when people who can afford rent a can’t afford to own their own home!

FooFighter99 · 02/02/2022 14:12

We're in the same position. We earn a decent wage, but rent and the cost of living are so expensive that we are never going to be able to save for a deposit

I will eventually inherit 1/3 of my mum's house/savings/whatever, but that could be in another (hopefully) 20 years, by which time we'll be too old for a mortgage

The only other way would be a lottery win, and we don't even play the damn thing!

I'm going to make sure DD saves for a house deposit when she starts working (she's only 10 Grin )

I'm resigned to the fact that we'll never be home owners, it is what it is

forgetfulnow · 02/02/2022 14:13

I have a disabled dc and we got priority for social housing. I was also a homeless single mum due to DV too which helped bump up my points. Worth getting housing advice though as a secure tenancy is definitely worthwhile (and also gives RTB which I'm going through now as a route to home ownership).

ComtesseDeSpair · 02/02/2022 14:15

Everyone I know who owns their home bought it before they had children and had that added pressure on their ability to save. That’s probably good advice to young people now, about what to prioritise. Of those I know who opted to have children first, many are now choosing to relocate to much cheaper areas of the country where they won’t need as high a deposit to get a mortgage. Is that an option for you?

AledsiPad · 02/02/2022 14:15

We're not even 'low' earners, OP, and we won't be homeowners until we inherit (which we will only do because one of us is an only child). This could be when we're in our 60s, so not exactly reassuring. It's awful. We pay a fortune in rent, but that apparently doesn't demonstrate to a bank that we can afford to pay less each month for a mortgage. Make it make sense? We aren't old enough to have benefitted from 100% mortgages unfortunately.

I intend to let DC live with us as long as possible to enable them to try and save to buy their own flats when they move out. We're not in a position to help any other way.

allthingsnaice · 02/02/2022 14:16

It made me wonder how on earth first time buyers with no financial help would get on the property ladder in current times

We bought at 25 when my partner was 28, we spoke to a mortgage advisor - found out what we could borrow on our salaries, then worked out our deposit backwards from that. We did the typical lower our spending things, shopped less, ate out less, didn't holiday for a while and it took us just over a year to save our deposit. However we don't have children, and both worked full time so had an advantage there. We paid rent and bills (1.5k per month ish) throughout this saving period, which is crazy looking back at it. I missed my coffee runs and shopping trips so much! I'm not sure what I'd have done if we had children, or lower paid jobs etc.

MiloAndEddie · 02/02/2022 14:20

There is a scheme called rent to buy that might be worth looking into.

BitcherOfBlakiven · 02/02/2022 14:26

@forgetfulnow

I have a disabled dc and we got priority for social housing. I was also a homeless single mum due to DV too which helped bump up my points. Worth getting housing advice though as a secure tenancy is definitely worthwhile (and also gives RTB which I'm going through now as a route to home ownership).
I’m disabled, have 1 disabled DC out of 3 and I’m past the end of my S21 and will probably end up in temp accom, then social housing - I’m not passing the affordability checks for private rent, I have no capacity to earn more money (until I’ve finished my degree and even then, it will be years before/if I ever hit enough to get a mortgage).

I already live in a crap hole inner city area, probably one of the worst areas around here, so I can’t downgrade the area either!

Crankley · 02/02/2022 14:27

I appreciate it was easier when I bought my first property but I had to make a huge effort and several sacrifices to be able to save to get a mortgage at 8% back then, I had a full time job plus I worked in a pub evenings/weekends, had a stall selling antiques in a market on Saturdays, no car, no holidays, very few new clothes, no eating out, cheap home made food.

You chose to have a child which is entirely up to you but that prevents you/DH from doing many if any of the above. It also means you are likely to need more than a one bedroom flat.

When the interest rate rose to 15%, to be able to afford the rent I lived and slept in my living room and rented out my bedroom. You obviously couldn't do that either.

Whatsonmymindgrapes · 02/02/2022 14:28

Others manage it by saving very hard and having high paying jobs or can live at home while they save.

I’m sorry you’re struggling. Good luck.

GroundToAHalterNeck · 02/02/2022 14:32

@Crankley believe me, we have made huge sacrifices over the years. We did choose to have a child, but we did not anticipate our own parental disability alongside our child’s SN. When you’re unable to work more hours to save more money , then your situation is not comparable . I completely agree saving for a deposit takes dedication and sacrifices, but even with those, for some, it’s still unobtainable.

OP posts:
GroundToAHalterNeck · 02/02/2022 14:33

@Crankley my pp is not intended to sound off in any form Smile

OP posts:
leafcuttingwhale · 02/02/2022 14:34

Its the fault of repeated governments. They failed to invest in creating more social housing (quite the opposite) and have completed failed to cultivate a professional private rented sector, and of course not enough housing for sale is being built either.

They basically haven't got to grips with any part of the housing market.

safetyfreak · 02/02/2022 14:37

I managed to buy with my partner and with a child.

Lockdown enabled me to work from home, which meant i saved on childcare costs and when my partner moved into my rented home, we both saved together. We also had a help to buy ISA which gave us 2000 towards our deposit.

We could only afford a 5% deposit and got a new build 3 bedroom house.

At the time our household income was 53k, so not huge but we still got on the market and this is in the South East.

The problem for the majority of people is the depost, it is a huge sum of money and can take years to save.

Heyahun · 02/02/2022 14:39

I never would have been able to save if i'd had my daughter first!

We waited and lived in a bloody house share as a married couple for 3 years and had a pretty shite lifestyle tbh - literally working and spending nothing but necessities (ie food to cook at home) no new clothes unless absolutely needed etc and got there in the end and bought our flat

now i have my daughter and there is no way I can even save a penny monthly at the moment - maternity leave and now nursery fees its nuts