Page 2 | Nighttime anxiety destroying me

Happyhappyday · 02/02/2022 03:26

I would look up CBT techniques & specifically for sleep, I did exactly the same as you and found both HUGELY helpful. Life changing my helpful, plus short very low dose anti-ds make you sleepy.

thisdayistoolong · 02/02/2022 04:21

It's why I'm awake now.

So annoying and while the anxiety is milder during the day why does it have to feel so intense in the dead of the night?

Mine is usually around working and losing my job for mistakes that may be uncovered so I guess this is the catastrophising aspect.

I don't quite know how bad it has to be to see a gp and as it mostly fades away by morning it never seems significant enough to do anything about it.

Hope this provides some reassurance that you're not along OP.

Mabelface · 02/02/2022 06:13

I take a beta blocker every evening to combat this.

LactoseTheIntolerant · 02/02/2022 07:05

Are you drinking any alcohol at all the evening before?
Alcohol used to really do this to me, I stopped drinking completely because of it, and haven't suffered with it since.

AnnieSaxophone · 02/02/2022 07:18

Me too. Exactly the same as you OP.
How old are you? This is classic peri-menopausal / menopausal symptom.
I started HRT as couple of months ago and it all stopped.

thisdayistoolong · 02/02/2022 07:26

No alcohol.

More coffee than usual, not loads just more than usual for me. Could that do it?

Blimmingdull · 02/02/2022 07:34

When this happens to me, I get up and go downstairs, and write down literally every big or little thing that is bothering me in detail until there is nothing else to write down. And then I go back to bed. It usually works.

I’ve also started saying to myself in my head - “your night brain can’t fix these things so leave them alone” over and over again, and that seems to help (partly because it’s happened so often I know that nothing I do in the night has any bearing on what I do the next day!)

ByeByeMissAmericanPie · 02/02/2022 07:42

I also recommend the free app Insight Timer. Not a catchy name, but has hundreds of brilliant sleep meditations. Look up Yoga Nidra which requires nothing more of you than to lie there and listen… and fall asleep.
Works every time!

VelvetChairGirl · 02/02/2022 12:42

@mrshathway

I’m posting on AIBU because I’m hoping that just one person might be able to give me some advice that will help me with this. Most nights I get off to sleep no problem but wake a few hours later and start completely catastrophizing things that might happen. Currently I’m worried about my DS in his late teens. Much of it is pointless worrying such as he’s not eating healthy lunches at college, then bigger things like he’s going to mess up his A’levels and not be able to proceed with the career he wants. Other times I worry about other stuff which is normally out of my control. Then I literally start worrying about anything and everything else. I can’t get back to sleep so I’m tired the next day and some of the anxiety lingers on although it’s never as bad during the day. Has anyone else been able to manage this? I could really do with some advice or techniques to switch off my brain when this happens.

is anything else happening in your life?

my ex was emotionally abusive for years, I didnt see it for what it was but my body did.

I had random panic attacks, I would get anxiety attacks if I stood in a queue at a shop or bank etc and I didnt know why, I was obsessed with cleaning, I had exploding head syndrome which would wake me up multiple times a night, I had palpitations randomly and all sorts of things.

it wasnt until he went that I relaxed and everything started making sense, the panic attacks, exploding head syndrome etc all went away as I got more relaxed and felt safe.

so I say something is stressing you out and it may not be any of the things your talking about such as your childs teenage years that they just be a mental distraction from the cause possibly because you dont even recognise the cause, so you need to figure it out and deal with the stress inducer.

readyshreddiescook · 07/02/2022 09:44

@Mabelface I take Beta Blockers for this but if I take them before bed or when I wake in the night, they give me nightmares - great during the day but hideous dreams if taken at night - do you suffer from them as well?

I'm sick of being soaked through with sweat every night. I'm considering asking for HRT at my medication review next week. I'm 45 but have been suffering the sweats for the last 3-4 four years and the night time anxiety for the last two years (hence asking for Beta Blockers last year). I do the mindfulness etc. and take Kalms and Kalms Sleep but they're not really having much of an effect. Going to sleep is just a miserable experience at the moment.

My mum started the menopause early (around 45) so I'm wondering if it's hereditary and I've been in Perimenopause for the last few years?

HaveToSaySomethingHere · 07/02/2022 10:01

Good outdoors exercise during the day?

Mabelface · 08/02/2022 10:44

I don't get nightmares. Definitely ask for hrt, peri can cause horrendous anxiety.

deeplyrooted · 08/02/2022 10:53

I’ve no good advice to offer. I mumsnet in the wee hours for this exact reason and once I’ve filled my brain with other peoples problems, I watch short videos on Pinterest (TikTok might be better) with the sound off until I zonk back to sleep.

I don’t think it’s a remotely healthy solution.

I used to just make a note if I woke at night or think “I’ll get on that at ten tomorrow” and my brain would let go. But now (perimenopause) the stuff that keeps me wake is wild catastrophes or stupid niggles that just don’t matter in the morning. It’s really frustrating.

If it happens in the daytime I can recognise that it’s just a surge of some hormone and stay with the physical effects rather than letting my mind go wild making up daft stories to fit the feelings. But in the night it gets away from me.

VariationsonaTheme · 08/02/2022 11:02

Try the CBT stuff first, there are some really good apps, but you might benefit from medication. I’ve had the same over the last year and tried all the psychotherapy techniques but finally had to admit defeat when I was sleeping about two hours a night and the anxiety was spilling over into the daytime and I was having panic attacks. I now take propranolol and mirtazipine, both of which have been lifesaving for me.

Blabla81 · 08/02/2022 11:03

@Laiste

I get this every now and again. The Catastrophsing.

I also get Night Rage (i made the name up) where i get angrier and angrier about something until my heart is literally pumping as if i'm in a big argument! Last time it happened i was tossing and turning at 3am with rage about the inconsiderate fuckers who park on the pavement at school pick up ... i mean ...

Good advice given already. I do believe it helps to talk/laugh about it with someone the next day if you can. It takes away a bit of seriousness of it and might help you lighten your mood when it starts happening.

Keep a note pad by the bed and if there's something specific you are turning over and over in your mind sit up and write it down. Do it for each thing which pops up. Let your brain know you will 'deal with it'' in the morning until it runs out of ideas.

in the morning you won't give a fuck but your night brain doesn't know this

Oh god I get this too, as well as the awful anxiety the OP talks about. I also invent scenarios in my head of things that are ridiculous based on things that might happen (mainly made up things created by my anxiety) . So far, the only thing that seems to help me is taking half a sleeping tablet to knock me out. Not the healthiest way to overcome it, but so far, it’s the quick fix I need. I must find another way though.

itstimeforme · 08/02/2022 11:11

I take magnesium before bed which helps me to have a calm night but often wake in the morning feeling absolute dread even on days when I'm doing nice things! What's that all about? Perimenopause I guess.

carolineannabel22 · 08/02/2022 11:48

Every time I read a post like this, I want to send it to my GP. I had the most horrendous nighttime anxiety and insomnia which was horrific. I almost felt suicidal and that I was going to have to be sectioned. I was having panic attacks so bad that when I had the first one, I thought I was having a heart attack.

GP was convinced I was depressed but after the fifth visit, I persuaded him to let me try HRT and it's been life changing. I feel like me again and am sleeping really well. In tough times, dr gave me lorazapam for panic attacks and Zopliclone to sleep - both of which were also life savers at the time but didn't address the cause, just eased symptoms. HRT for perimenopause is what I needed. I printed off a list of symptoms and ticked all the ones that applied to me and gave it to my doctor who finally agreed it was peri menopause and not depression!! I went in prepared for battle. Go to the doctors!!

Onlyhuman123 · 08/02/2022 13:23

How old are you? are you peri? If yes, this is likely a symptom and when I had this, HRT helped massively (I know it's not always the answer though). I also did meditation using Headspace app (there is another one called 'calm' i think which others say is really good). Other advice I had was to write down what was worrying me and ask myself if i can do anything about it...if no, then it has to be left alone, if yes, promise yourself you will do XYZ in the morning to resolve it. Also, try using essential oils in a diffuser in the bedroom at night...use ones like Sweet Orange, Vetiver, Lavender, Valerian, roman Chamomile; just a few drops of any one of them or up to 3 of them in a diffuser or in a tissue tucked under your pillow.