Unfriendly neighbours

[Lemonnata]

DH and I live in a cul-de-sac in a lovely area, have been here for just over 3 years.

Neighbours are all great apart from one elderly couple, we've always been friendly but have to initiate greetings every single time otherwise they blank us. They are very friendly with all the other neighbours.

The husband on bin days brings in everyone's bins except ours, around ten neighbouring bins, from the communal area right to their gardens, leaving our lonely little bin on it's own which I see when I get home from work (I've seen him do this when I've been working from home). It's so obvious. Another neighbour sometimes beats him to it and brings in everyone's, including ours.

When I was outside cleaning my car the wife went from door to door pointedly delivering Christmas cards, missing us out.

I'm not THAT bothered but do find it irritating and weird when we've been nothing but pleasant. My DP says not to let it get to me (he's way more easygoing than me!) but it annoys me.

We are the only people that rent in the street and my husband is Eastern European. WWYD, if anything?

Have you asked the other neighbours what they think the issue might be?

They don’t seem to like you. Maybe they’ve got the hump about something. Maybe there’s an imagined grievance.

I’d just leave them to it. Be friendly with the other neighbours and ignore them.

They are just rude. Don't pay them any attention, they are not worth it
Others will have noticed their pettiness

I really wouldn't give it head space. Just be grateful for the nice neighbours you do have and stop having any interaction with the not so nice ones.

Ignore it. It's their problem, not yours.

We are the only people that rent in the street and my husband is Eastern European. WWYD, if anything? this is your answer unfortunately, its old fashioned English snobbery and xenophobia. Sorry you are having to put up with it. There isn't much you can do, unfortunately. Just carry on as you are, be friendly with everyone else and ignore the batty ones.

Try not to give them head space, they are complete arses! I'm very sensitive to things like this but made a New Years Resolutions that this was the year of caring less, I repeat that everytime I get anxious about behavior in others I can't control, it helps!

It's their problem. Ignore. Don't assume it's to do with your husband. It could be some perceived slight or mistaken identity.

Don’t do anything. If you get on fine with everyone else, it’s most likely an issue with them rather than anything you’ve done.

Maybe a friend or relative wanted your property and you beat them to it?
Maybe you wake them up leaving for work?
Maybe your light shines through their curtains?
Who knows -people are weird. Ignore them.

I'd personally passive aggressively over nice them but I probably deal with these things badly.

I also wondered if you pinched the house from someone they wanted to have it. Either way it’s their loss, they sound horrible. Don’t give them headspace and rise above.

We are the only people that rent in the street and my husband is Eastern European. WWYD, if anything?

This may or may not be relevant, literally no-one here can tell you but since it's obvious they don't like you, there's nothing you can do.

I totally ignore idiots like that. They are probably massive racists.

He actually takes in around 10 bins every week for all the neighbours? Talk about overkill. Personally I would hate this, I'm perfectly capable of taking my own bin in. I'd avoid anything more than a polite hello as they sound like the type to be all in your business once you actually got to know them. As long as the other neighbours are nice I wouldn't be too concerned.

They sound nasty. It’s so rude to purposefully and pointedly leave out one neighbour when putting bins back or giving Christmas cards. I think I would either have to ask them what their problem was, (but this doesn’t always get a direct answer with weirdos like that, they might just deny it and try and make you feel paranoid), or ignore them totally for ever more, also awkward. Just remember they are the problem, not you.

I have a neighbour like this. She arranged a Christmas light switch on and made it obvious she was leaving us out. In our case this neighbour is incredibly insecure and gets a kick out of having some sort of perceived 'power'.

I feel really sorry for her and don't engage.

My guess is because you rent your property - snobbery. Bizarre behaviour and I'd ignore Themis behaviour and stay just as you are - civil.

We had a man on our old new build estate who was an absolute snob towards renters didn't speak to them, even thought the people with a mortgage were below him! Some people are just strange!

From experience of previous neighbours, some people who've lived in a place for a long time, see themselves as top dog, gatekeeper types, that new neighbours should cowtow to, earn their friendship and abide by daft unwritten rules. Really not worth the slightest notice.

My guess is because you rent your property - snobbery.

I think it's probably this - although probably with a chunk of xenophobia thrown in as well.

Some horrible snobs see renters as second-class citizens, people who won't care about the neighbourhood as they have no personal stake in it, maybe feckless/on benefits/unemployed and an all-round general low form of people blighting the area.

They've read about one or two cases of nightmare social housing tenants in the Daily Mail and extrapolated that to everybody who rents their home. They quite probably see your moving into your home as a terrorist act against the 'decent' folk, determined to single-handedly drag the street into the gutter and eventually leave it an abandoned slum! Everybody loves to jump to massive conclusions and find a scapegoat, to make themselves feel better and more important for some stupid arbitrary reason.

People like this are very hard of thinking and highly unlikely to change their ways. Just ignore them, if you can, and pity them for having to/choosing to live their lives harbouring so much negativity and unpleasantness.

We had a man on our old new build estate who was an absolute snob towards renters didn't speak to them, even thought the people with a mortgage were below him! Some people are just strange!

Some people are so bizarre and pathetically self-aggrandising, aren't they? When his time finally comes, he probably fully expects to make the end-of-year 'celebrating the heroes we lost' sections across all the media.

There'll be an amazing scientist who found the cure for cancer, an influential humanitarian powerhouse who managed to completely end world poverty, and towering above them both, Brian from Winterton Crescent - whose life circumstances enabled him to own the bungalow he lived in outright from a relatively young age

Are you the newest people in the street. Maybe they actually know everyone else 🤷🏻‍♀️