To frequently change my MN user name?

[CrymeaRvr]

I change my MN on a fairly frequent basis. 1) to prevent anyone knowing who I am when I put on personal stuff so I worry being able to search for my posts would make me identifiable IRL which would out me off asking for advice around relationships etc.

1. I’m in the feminism board a bit and have experienced the nastiness that is a pile-on when my opinions on some subjects, particularly LGBTQ+ stuff, differs from the majority.

A good friend reckons that it’s unreasonable of me, and if I’m going to put out my opinions then I should be able to stand by them regardless of consequences and/or people piling on. She has the one name that she’s had forever and people apparently ‘know’ her on MN.
She keeps banging on about it. So, AIBU to change my name when I feel it’s necessary???

I change my name every 5 minutes. It's just sensible.

I change my name because I have actually recognised some people on here.

How can it be unreasonable to use the features of any forum? This is an unnecessary thing to have to ev en consider.

@CrymeaRvr

I was hoping/assuming I was the norm rather than the exception! Though I am on one thread, left it for a day, changed my name as I do and discover that under my old name I’m being called all sorts for not engaging and just buggering off! Which I haven’t, just a new name. I regret that a bit but maybe it’s for the best as I don’t want to get into an online slanging match with anyone!

OP, if you do want to reply to a thread after you’ve changed names, you can change back to your previous name for the old thread.

Similar to jugglingJanuary I do miss the times when there were posters whose opinions I was interested to read because they had the same username for years and I had respect for their ideas. Now I rarely follow any one poster.

Name change all you like and don’t think twice about it.

@YeahThankYou didn’t occur to me to try that!
Still, that threads a right pile on and my old user name is getting an absolute thumping, so maybe I won’t on this occasion!!

I do miss the old times, certainly, when people had one name for years. The problem though is that as my DC have grown, and had numerous issues in the pandemic, I don't want to risk any school mums recognising them rather than me. Sometimes you can give away quite a lot on here without intending to.

I change my name for different topics. Sex and chat, family another or politics current affairs a third.

I change about once a month. I also change ages and sexes of my children, nursery/work hours, what car I drive, where I live. Bloody hard work trying to remember some times.

I've recognised 3-4 friends/local mums on here.

This post has relieved me of a lot of my guilt! I have changed a few times because I don't want information to be identifiable!

People who put any stock into having a recognisable MN ‘presence’ make me cringe.

I name change regularly too.

I don’t change my username and am pretty vocal on the feminism boards. I feel, for me, it’s time to stand by my views. I’m okay about it but it’s taken me 2 years to get here.

If I was doxed I would probs be really upset and frightened.

I change mine every time I think of something new.

I'm quite outspoken on these boards (which isn't always popular!!), but I stand by my opinions. I only name change if I want to comment something that might be massively outing, then I change back to this name.

YANBU. your friend sounds like a dick though.

‘ YANBU. your friend sounds like a dick though.’

Harsh! She’s lovely but very GC in her views, and not one to hold back an opinion so she just a bit more ballsy.

Honestly, these boards are best viewed as a slightly bonkers parallel universe anyway. Responses range from very sensible and helpful to absolutely demented. I once posted about an evolving security/police issue and if I'd responded the way many of the posters on the thread wanted me to, a right mess would have ensued.

If you opt to keep a consistent username on here and take the consequences, that's a totally valid choice, but there is no moral imperative to, and a strong practical one for frequent changes.

YANBU - though now I'm worried there might actually only be 10 of us on here.

@GreenDressRedWine

YANBU - though now I'm worried there might actually only be 10 of us on here.

😂😂😂

@GreenDressRedWine

YANBU - though now I'm worried there might actually only be 10 of us on here.

The entire user system is built around facilitating trolling so I don't think you are being unreasonable in exploiting that for anonymity

YANBU I've been 'ere since it 'twas all fields lass ... I was a young mum though ,

Seriously though I had been outed by people in RL (people I didn't want to be outed by) a couple of times when I realised I preferred NCing, and it's not just that, a lot of the time I just thought of a name I preferred/felt relevant at the time.

I find that most prolific posters have a distinctive posting style regardless, you can just tell.

So no sinister reasons for NCing here, sorry to disappoint the critics.

You seem to want to discuss your grievances about your experience on the feminism boards rather than whether or not it's reasonable to change name frequently OP!

Most of us change name a lot. There are a tiny number of posters out of however many million it is supposed to be now who have kept the same name for the duration. They are in a very small minority.

@ZoeTheThornyDevil

Honestly, these boards are best viewed as a slightly bonkers parallel universe anyway. Responses range from very sensible and helpful to absolutely demented. I once posted about an evolving security/police issue and if I'd responded the way many of the posters on the thread wanted me to, a right mess would have ensued.

If you opt to keep a consistent username on here and take the consequences, that's a totally valid choice, but there is no moral imperative to, and a strong practical one for frequent changes.

This. ^

@JumperJump

I change all the time. However it always amuses me that posters say they name change so they aren’t identified… many posters live outside England so they are not going to be able to identify someone based on the poster’s neighbour’s parking skills or their adorable three year old triplets with names all beginning with S.

Yes, but there also also lots of posters on from the same places 'outside England', and in some smaller societies, it would be extremely easy to identify people in RL. On a recent thread about something entirely different, four Mners in Ireland turned out to know the same man with an unusual name -- and I don't think it was even on Craicnet, it was on a general Mn thread.

And frankly, it's easier to NC frequently and be comparatively frank about your life when you do post, rather than stay with the same username and hide/alter circumstances that could be identifying, if combined with information you've been posting in dribs and drabs over years. It seems to me unlikely that someone would think 'I recognise that story -- I'll look up that poster's posting history and see if they are actually my SIL', but it clearly happens.

You have to I think (especially if you post a thread yourself, that is about you and your life and your issues etc.)

Because

1. as you say, people could recognise you/identify you, if they look through your old posts.

2. Some posters purposely trawl through your old posts to dig up something on you to use against you, and then think they're Columbo when they smugly yell 'HA HA GOTCHA!'

3. Some posters can be vile. Yep I said that word that some people seem to loathe. VILE. Some posters just dig and prod, and verbally attack, call the OP unhinged, a loony, and 'hard work,' and other rude and obnoxious insults. And yeah, you sometimes get a pile-on.

In addition, I have seen people having a pop at someone PURELY because they had a spat with them some weeks ago, or even some MONTHS ago. I had a bit of an argument with someone on a thread about a week ago, and the poster just fired a rude insult at me a couple of days ago on a different/newer thread, for NO reason other than she doesn't like me.

Sometimes, along the way, especially if you're a bit outspoken, or you don't agree with the masses, and go against the grain, you can pick up a few enemies, and a few of them start ganging up on you.

So it's hardly surprising people make up new usernames every few weeks (or months...)