Running a red light at a crossing

[Latte123]

Help me, I feel so ashamed, can you hand yourself in for running a red at a crossing? I've been so stupid and I just didn't realise, until I looked in my rear view mirror and saw people walking on the crossing, I couldn't see them to my left at first because there was a bus there, no one was hurt but I feel horrific, is there anything I can do for more information about what I did?

I went merrily sailing over a zebra crossing a while back and sort of realised half way over that a very pissed off woman was standing there waiting. These things happen.

Haha, sorry, sounded like my mother then

Such a silly thing to do, I've no excuse for how I missed the light,

@GaiusHelenMohiam

I went merrily sailing over a zebra crossing a while back and sort of realised half way over that a very pissed off woman was standing there waiting. These things happen.

Although I’ve just looked it up, and like 80% of people I had no idea I actually did the CORRECT THING.

Drivers are only supposed to stop when someone is ON the crossing, not waiting to cross

OP if it helps we have a crossing on a major road near our house. It's just round a bend and one day when DS was in the pram and we were on the crossing, someone blew through it. I assume they didn't see it. We were inches away from being ploughed down and it was a terrifying experience. I think about it a lot 12 years later. When I think about it, it is important for me to believe that they learnt from that day. I don't need them to have beaten themselves up but I do need to believe that they committed to being the best drive they could be in all circumstances, regardless of distractions, to make sure that never happened again. If you make this commitment to yourself, then maybe this is a good thing. No one was hurt and you will be a safer driver for it.

I feel so guilty for putting them through it, I'm going to be different going forward from this, I'm definitely committing myself to be the best and safest I can be.

I rarely go out, either in my car or on foot, without encountering someone in charge of a vehicle who makes me mutter 'wanker' under my breath, rightly or wrongly. I'm sure that sometimes other people say it about me when I'm behind the wheel too, rightly or wrongly. OP, most people will have forgotten this incident, if it even was one, in seconds. Don't make that mistake again, absolutely, but don't beat yourself up for not being perfect. Who is?

Lucky you weren’t cycling as then nobody would be telling you to forget about it, shit happens.

A cyclist would receive a much less sympathetic response

There's nothing else for it OP. You must go back with a giant hand-painted sign saying "I am sorry to all traumatised pedestrians for my inability to stop at crossings" and stand at the crossing all day. Don't forget your hair shirt.

Or you can do what literally everyone else would do, which is to remember to pay attention better in future.

Now, have a nice cup of tea and for God's own sake chill out.

Obviously it's not great, but it is a mistake. I would put it down to that. What I do wonder though is if you generally feel quite anxious. I can feel really anxious sometimes and a few days later see my response as quite disproportionate.

I will be doing, thank you

I didn't think I was having an anxious day, but I've been really overthinking the situation.

It's sometimes a good thing that these near misses happen.

They serve as a "shot across the bows", or a warning, so you are going to be a little bit more attentive every time you drive past a traffic light, and you will be a better driver.

I nearly reversed into a woman with a pushchair once - my blood absolutely froze, and I never let my attention wander again.

It'd devastating isn't it, so disappointed in myself.

Latte

From experience I know that nothing anyone can say can really take away your guilt. You need to let these awful guilt-ridden emotions go , acknowledge them but don’t pay any more attention to them. If you do, the guilt will never go and you will end up making yourself poorly.

I completely understand how you feel, I have felt like you many times. You can let this go.

Amanda x